People were often afraid that once they lost control in their lives, the remainder of their life would just vanish away from them. They were mostly afraid that they had a small possibility that would become so much bigger, later on, they were afraid of losing themselves to the arms of psychotic danger.

Unfortunately, it was me this time. My fear consumed me as I shivered in my wheelchair and tried to calm myself by watching Levy's frantic eyes in front of mine the moment he crouched down, holding my sides when my body continued its usual spasm and my eyes went blank at another hallucination.

"Make it stop, make it stop!" I screamed as another image of Levy shooting my dad with an atrocious smile as he aimed the gun at me once again. My heart frenzied and my hands trembled at a faster rate, making my fingers throb even more.

Levy's face was replaced by Dr. Alana as she placed both of her hands on the sides of my head and began to massage it as she told me to calm down. I couldn't thank her enough for making the hallucinations fade away by her soft fingers. They were slowly trudging away until it disappeared through thin air.

I exhaled steadily and my eyes watered at the impact which was losing feeling of my hands, I recognized the symptoms of the post-traumatic disorder and I wanted to deny that, convincing myself that I was fine but the agitated expression on Levy's face further proved that I was turning into maniacal, sick person.

I was becoming like my mom. I thought as the dreadful realization settled in my head, creating a thread of despaired thoughts. My eyes flickered between the exchange of hushed conversation between Dr. Alana and Levy, the main discussion was about me. The psycho, unstable Lia Maxwell who was completely filled with life before.

It was God's plan and I fully wanted to recover from these scary hallucinations. I had to, or else I would turn out like mom and go crazy after Levy's girlfriends just like what she did with Mr. Clay.

"Fix me, right now," I demanded from the surprised therapist as she raised a hand under her chin in thought. Her eyes searched my nervous ones and her chestnut hair illuminated her blonde highlights under the fluorescent lights of her office. I could tell that she thought of the fastest ways to heal me but she couldn't come to a proper conclusion as she wore her eyeglasses again.

"You have post-traumatic disorder," she validated my thought exactly and continued, "I shouldn't have dived into a serious question that fast because it seemed like it had triggered your brain, we need to make baby steps," she said and I agreed with her.

"These hallucinations were extracted by your untamed fears so you need to learn how to let your fears go, you can do that by meditation or exercise to keep your brain busy and away from these hallucinations, as well as find inner peace," she educated further.

I felt like an old woman because I couldn't move a muscle from my worn out body that has been the victim of these harsh imaginations.

"According to what I saw," she went on, "you are now in the guilt phase, you need to slowly let your mind know that you aren't guilty, don't let your mind be easily triggered, distract yourself and you'll be able to deal with that, any questions?" she asked when she concluded and I shook my head.

"We will start next week because you need rest," she stood up and walked to me to shake my hand and Levy's hand. I thanked her a million times, she chuckled in response and told me that she hoped I felt better soon.

I was deep in thoughts as Levy silently strolled me out to his motorbike after he filled my application form and signed for me. He placed me on the motorbike before leaving the wheelchair on the side of the center entrance then walked back with troubled amber eyes.

"Levy, I am turning insane," I said in a hoarse voice, I had the dire need to admit that to myself and to Levy.

That only made him frustrated as his hand bashed his motorbike's handle and he tried to calm himself. I could tell he was affected by my disorder too, it was the first time he saw me this way other than the night of me thrashing and screaming, this was the worst. I felt like a fish out of water, begging to live again as the crazy arms of deranged dreams embraced me and I tried to swim over the water but to no avail.

"I should have never listened to you and took you to my business deal," he boiled in his own heat of anger as he paced in front of me, ruffling his hair two times in one minute.

"Levy, what happened has happened," I told him with a tight-lipped scowl, "you can't keep blaming yourself over and over again, my mom was bound to hit rock bottom because of your dad," I reasoned but that only made him pace faster as he crazily laughed.

"We could have prevented that, I don't want you to stay in that disorder, it will kill me with worry," he stopped and took my face in his palms with conviction in his eyes.

"I will try to not think about it as much as I could," I held his hand as I promised him, "I will do everything I can to keep myself stable."

"Great, because you're coming to the gym with me tomorrow." A grin took over his handsome face as he kissed my cheek and I groaned at his idea. I couldn't even walk still.

"Nope," I grinned back, "don't you remember that I have a fractured ankle," his excited smile turned upside down.

"That's okay," he smiled when he uncovered his face from his hands, "we are going to train your jelly-like arms."