I'm such an idiot. What was I thinking? How could I have just thrown myself into the arms of a stranger and let my guard down like that? That desire to be close to someone, for once, had been so enticing. I had wanted it too badly...so badly that I trusted someone that I barely know. 

Pretending to be someone that I'm not was taking such a toll on me that I was all too willing to open up to the first person who I thought saw me for who I am. I've been walking around on autopilot for so long, doing things to please people, but never doing things for myself. I was pleasing Alec by dating Logan. I was pleasing Cade by pleasing Alec. And I was pleasing Logan by convincing him that taking vows would be part of our future. 

When Harry came around, I finally realized how exhausted I was around everyone else. Something about him woke me up from going through life mindlessly. He was exciting and confusing and the only disruption to my otherwise dull life. 

Rubbing my temples in small circles, I try to relieve the headache that has begun to throb. All of this emotion and confusion that I've experienced tonight has made it difficult to keep my eyes open. I plug in my Dreamscope cords and roll over on my side, not even bothering to change into sleep clothing.

I try to fall asleep, but my mind keeps wandering back to a pair of green eyes and shaggy brown hair. That idiot doesn't even have the decency to leave my thoughts while I try to sleep.

Even though I'm trying not to think about him, I can't help wondering if I'll ever see him again. Maybe he sees me as a lost cause and he doesn't want to protect me from whatever he's so adamant about hiding. If he doesn't come back, that means that I'll have to return to my bland, repetitive, empty life. I'm not ready to accept that idea yet, so I squeeze my eyes shut and try to drown out the anxious thoughts springing to the forefront of my mind. 

For some reason unknown to me, Harry is giving my spirit fire. It's a slow burn, but at least it's something, where before him there wasn't even a spark. He might be pissing me off in the process, but he stirs something deep within me that has been numb until now.

At some point during my internal discussion, I fall into a deep sleep. It isn't long though before I feel fingers caressing my forehead and my disoriented mind can't piece together why Cade would be trying to wake me up this early. Or at all. Why is Cade in my room?

My eyes open rapidly, expecting to see Cade's face, but I'm greeted by another. The same green eyes that hadn't left my thoughts earlier in the night are now staring back at me. They're pools of jade green, filled with concern.

"Harry? What is it? What's wrong?" In my tired state, I completely forget that I'm supposed to be angry with him. I want to fix whatever is worrying him.

"Nya, I'm so sorry." He whispers as he looks away, ashamed. As I blink a few times and my mind becomes clearer, the events of last night begin to resurface. Anger stirs in my chest and I'm prepared to give Harry an earful, but he looks back up at me with such sorrow in his expression. "I should have never left."

I'm just now noticing that the sun is just barely making its way into the early morning sky. It's so early that I can't imagine Harry has had time to get any sleep tonight. His paler than normal complexion and shrunken eyes reveal that my assumption is probably correct.

"Please say something," he pleads and his voice holds so much emotion that I wouldn't be surprised if he dropped to his knees and begged for forgiveness right here and now.

"I'm not sure what to say, Harry." It isn't that I'm struggling for words. I just don't know how much use it would be to have this discussion. Every conversation we've had since I met him has been an argument. "You came to talk last night, but you didn't really tell me anything. Then you left. You hold all the power here. Not me."

"No, no." He shakes his head vehemently. "No, I don't at all. That's why I had to leave last night. I know you don't understand right now, but it's you who holds all the power. I'm not sure how that happened, but for some reason I find myself wanting to tell you everything. So I had to walk away."

"You should tell me everything. I want to know things, Harry. Part of me is selfish, I know. But there's another part of me that just wants to know so that you don't have to be alone with whatever is going on. Please tell me. But...don't walk away this time," I say softly.

He's sitting so close to me and I don't stop myself as I reach out to him. I can't help but notice how opposite my feelings are around him compared to how they are with Logan. Logan repels me while Harry draws me in. I find myself needing to touch him the more I'm with him, even if our contact is brief.

My hand runs along his arm and his body visibly relaxes at my touch, his eyes closing with satisfaction. I know I should still be keeping my guard up after what happened last night, but my gut is telling me to give him another chance.

I choose this moment to unplug my Dreamscope cords. Even though I'm up early, I doubt it will look suspicious since I went to bed earlier than normal last night.

"I'm not going to run away this time," Harry says as he opens his eyes to look at me, his troubled look subsiding. "I've been up all night, going crazy about all this, and I've given it a lot of thought. There are a lot of things that I still won't be able to explain and I probably won't be able to answer any of the questions I know you're bound to ask..."

A small smile tugs at the corners of his lips and I find myself smiling back in return, but I throw in an eye roll for good measure.

"What made you change your mind?" I ask, genuinely curious. Does my safety not matter as much to him as it did before?

"It's not that I've changed my mind. I still want to protect you," he answers, as if reading my mind. "I just need to tell you things that I hadn't planned on telling you until much later." He rubs the back of his neck and seems flustered for a moment. "I don't want to keep things from you anymore, Nya."

I'm filled with elation as I realize that my curious nature is about to be rewarded. But another part of me is also warmed by Harry's admission.

I pull him toward me and make room for him on the bed so he can lay beside me. After getting under the covers, Harry rotates on his side so he can face me. We're close enough to feel each other's warmth even though we aren't touching.

"I want to hear about it if you want to tell me," I say after we are situated comfortably in the bed.

"You don't have to say that for me to know it already," Harry teases. "Your curiosity seems to grow by the day."

For once, since the first time I've spoken to Harry, I'm at a loss for a witty reply. What he said is true and I don't even have a denial.

"I suppose I was just saying it as a courtesy," I admit.

"I wouldn't peg you for a girl that says things out of courtesy often," he jokes and I'm glad to see that a little life has returned to his features.

As if anticipating Harry's explanation, my hand grabs his for comfort and I lace my fingers through his.

"Don't be nervous," he whispers, his tone switching from playful to serious in an instant. "I just want you to know the truth."

"Then please start because I'm imagining the worst possibilities." As I say this, my body starts shaking slightly. 

He rubs his thumb against my hand the way he had last night and my shaking instantaneously begins to lessen.

"Okay...Well don't say that I didn't warn you..."

A/N: TRIPLE UPDATE!!! I might even update again tonight. I just want to post more chapters so I can get back to where I was before (which was approximately 65 chapters), so we still have a long way to go. 

ALSO check out the trailer that an amazing reader created for Dreamscope! I wish I could give them proper credit, but I'm not sure which wattpad user made it since I just found it on YouTube. It's my favorite thing ever to find trailers and manips that you guys make. <3