❝𝕴'𝖒 𝖓𝖔𝖙 𝖇𝖊𝖆𝖚𝖙𝖎𝖋𝖚𝖑 𝖑𝖎𝖐𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚,
𝕴'𝖒 𝖇𝖊𝖆𝖚𝖙𝖎𝖋𝖚𝖑 𝖑𝖎𝖐𝖊 𝖒𝖊.❞
- 𝖀𝖓𝖐𝖓𝖔𝖜𝖓

Your POV:

"Huh?"

I couldn't believe what I had just heard. He looked really sincere; or was it just my heart wanting him to be sincere? Wanting him to mean it? Taehyung took my hands in his own large and warm ones and I knew that it wasn't my mind playing tricks on me– this was real.

My heartbeat was faster than ever but my mind was sharper than ever too. Trying desperately to seek some sort of closure to this revelation.

"Don't think about yourself so badly," he said gently. "I have loved getting to know you. I don't regret it at all. I really do mean it when I say I really love you. This guy you like..."

He trailed off, searching my eyes for something but I was suddenly feeling shy. Four years of crushing on him and I finally find my dreams coming true.

"I'm going to take a really wild and hopeful guess and say it's me," his lips had tugged up from one corner. "It is me, right?"

I laughed and gave a nod, smiling widely. 

"Yeah well, see?" His smile was making my stomach twist into knots. "I love you. I don't know if you love me–"

I opened my mouth to tell him I do but he raised his right hand, effectively making me pause in confusion. 

"But if you do, I don't want to hear it," he continued, a knowing smile on his lips. "I want to hear you say that you love yourself first with as much sureness as you would have when saying you love me."

"Loving... myself?" I felt broken. I couldn't. I have never thought of loving who I am. 

"I want you to be proud of who you are," Taehyung squeezed my hands. "Because I can tell you that I'm proud of you. I'm sure Eul-soo and Min-ji are too. But none of it matters if you aren't proud of yourself. It doesn't matter if we love you but you don't love yourself."

I looked down at my lap. Loving myself is not going to be easy. I wonder if I'll ever be able to do it. Taehyung held my chin in his finger and made me look up.

"(Y/n), if someone else tells you that they hate ice-cream and think it tastes horrible," he said so softly that I felt calmer, "would you start hating ice-cream too?"

"No," I shook my head. He smiled kindly and tilted his head.

"That's how it is for everything," he answered. "Even if the whole world starts hating ice-cream, it wouldn't make you stop loving it. Because you truly do love it. Just like that, if you love yourself, others' opinions wouldn't matter. I know it won't be easy but we're here for you. I want to ask you out, take you on dates and have so much fun with you. But until you learn to love yourself, I don't think I'll be happy doing so. I want you to see that you're amazing."

"I'm not, Tae," I whispered. "I might be for you but I don't think I'm amazing."

"Then change," he said simply. "Change what you don't like about yourself so that you can develop into someone you'll be proud of. If you hate being fat, then exercise. Go on some diets or something. Whatever you don't like about yourself, try to change it. Try to make it better. But don't hate who you are on the inside. That's the (y/n) I love. And you should love her too."

"Even the manipulative part of me?" I asked teasingly, feeling the confidence coming from the way he was still grasping my hands. He blushed and looked away.

"That's kinda my favourite," he answered, turning to face me again. I was surprised. "I'm shy to compliment you so whenever you try to get them out of me I feel easier. Better. Because then it isn't awkward. You wanted my opinion. You wanted to hear it. When you cut your hair, I thought it looked good on you. But you didn't ask me so I couldn't bring myself to tell you that. I thought I would make my crush too obvious."

"You really..." I didn't know what to say. He seemed so sincere, so calm and so gentle. I wanted to do this. I wanted to love myself. Not just because of Taehyung, but because it's something I need to do for myself. Because I should love myself before I love others. 

"Come on," he stood up, pulling me up too. I leaned a bit forward and ended up in his arms. I could see him trying to keep in his amusement but the smile on his face was still really wide. "God I love you so much."

"I–," I tried to say it back but he placed his warm hand over my mouth and I felt something warm bloom in my chest. 

"Nuh-uh," he shook his head, the smile dropping into a mock seriousness. "Until you can say firmly that you love yourself, I'm not gonna hear those three words."

I nodded and he smiled before stepping back and slipping his left hand through my right one. We started walking back to my dorm like that, and I could feel the blood that had rushed to my cheeks upon holding his hands. 

Those few minutes seemed to last hours but seconds at the same time and then the next thing I knew, I was standing outside of our dorm room. I turned around to say bye to him but Taehyung just gave me a smile as he knocked on the door. The door opened and Eul-soo smiled upon seeing us.

"Take her inside and pamper her," Taehyung pushed me inside and I nearly fell into Eul-soo's arms; he was strong. I turned to look at him with wide eyes. He was smirking. "Tomorrow's gonna be a big day for her. It will be the start of the next big chapter in her life."

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Updated/Published On:
27th September 2020
27/09/2020

A/n:
Shoutout to Cursed Princess Club by LambCat on Webtoon which is where the ice-cream thing was totally inspired from. It's really awesome; give it a read guys!