I'm super proud of this one-shot and I hope you all enjoy it! 

Warning: May cause crying. 

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Astrid was sitting at the table in her hut with a mug of mead in front of her. She was on her third mug of it and told herself she would stop after this.

She looked around her house seeing the disaster it was, still was in from over the last few weeks. She wiped some tears she felt falling down her cheeks and sighed. They came so much it didn't even phase her anymore.

One memory or thought would set them off or even set her off into a complete breakdown. She was running the village and raising two young children. Alone. She still couldn't believe it. He was gone.

It had been three weeks. Three weeks since the Chief of Berk was set off and burned in a ship towards the Hidden World - Astrid knew he would've wanted that. Three weeks since Astrid has been a widow. She still couldn't believe he was gone and would stay up late so much just waiting for him to come through the door to greet her and their children. To hug her. Kiss her. Touch her. To hear his voice again. Which was now just a memory in her mind.

"Mommy?" Said a small voice. Astrid looked up from the table to see her daughter.

"Zeph, what are you doing up?" Astrid asked her.

"I can't sleep." She told her mom. "I miss daddy."

"Come here, bug." Astrid said calling her daughter by the nickname Hiccup gave her when she was a baby. Zephyr walked over to Astrid and climbed on her lap. Astrid hugged her.

"I miss him too." She told Zephyr. "We will always miss him. But he's here with us. He'll be with us all the time. Even if we don't think so."

"Why did he have to die? We needed him." Zephyr asked her mom sniffing a little.

"He died protecting us. He died protecting me and to keep his village safe." Astrid told her.

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They're had been an attack on New Berk and Hiccup got a group together and the gang to defend it. Astrid had gotten in a bad situation with the enemy and Hiccup intervened and ended up being stabbed in the process. Right in front of Astrid. Astrid partially blamed herself. She had fell to her knees and tried to stop the bleeding as some others took down the enemy. Hiccup grabbed her hands that were covered in his blood as she screamed. He looked up at her choked out some words here and there about her needing to lead. Make sure the kids knew he loved them. That he loved her. Astrid was sobbing at him to stop talking like that and he was going to be fine. She told him she loved him too. Kept trying to stop the blood.

Hiccups body had stopped moving. Astrid moved him. Saying his name. The others came and gathered around her seeing their Chief, son and friend, still on the ground. Astrid screamed his name and shook him telling him to wake up. Heather approached her gently.

"Astrid...." Heather said putting her hand on Astrid's shoulder. Astrid shrugged it off and threw herself over her husband's body. Screaming for him.

They stood there, everyone in shock and having their own tears fall. After some time. Valka walked over to Astrid and tried to move her off of Hiccup so they could take his body back to the village.

Astrid screamed at them, at everyone to leave her be. Leave them be. Valka took charge to get things and people in order and it had been a while. Astrid didn't know how long. But everyone had left except Heather, Valka and Gobber. Heather walked back to Astrid who was now laying beside her dead husband.

"Astrid, I know you don't wanna leave him. But the kids... they're asking for you. No one has told them yet." Heather told her friend gently. Astrid stood up slowly. She looked at them and wiped her tears away, smearing Hiccup's blood across her face.

"Okay." Was all she said. She walked away.

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Astrid was trying not to start crying again remembering the memory. Zephyr had fallen asleep in her lap and Astrid picked her up and went upstairs. She put Zephyr back to bed. Astrid closed her daughters door and walked to her bedroom.

She hadn't slept in her own bed since the last time Hiccup was with her. She usually slept with one of the kids or downstairs on the couch. She grabbed the handle and it was cold to the touch. She sighed and opened the door.

It was cold and dark. Something ominous about the room. Astrid saw one of the candles in the hall and grabbed it. She walked in leaving the door open. She slowly changed into her nightgown that had also been laying on the bed since she had changed out of it the morning before Hiccup's death.

The room was left the same. Some of her clothes on the floor and some of Hiccups laying over his chair at his desk that was full of his notes and drawings. Drawings of Toothless and Stormfly and their family we're pinned to the wall for him to look at while he worked.

Astrid sat on her side of the bed. She laid down and turned on her side to look at the empty space beside her. She thought back to the last night she had with her husband. They had brought up the thought of having a third child. It had been something talked about before, but kind of got forgotten about until that night.

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Hiccup had come home early and spent time with the kids, even put them to bed before joining Astrid on the couch in front of the fire. She had moved closer to him and he welcomed her into his arms with a smile. Planting a kiss on her head. She smiled. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Hiccup asked her.

"Do you want another kid?" Hiccup had said. Astrid sat up and looked at him a little surprised.

"That was out of nowhere." She said to her husband. Hiccup smirked at her.
"I've just been thinking of it more lately. But only if you want too." He said to her. Astrid smiled at him.

"I've been thinking about it too. Nuffink is six now. We waited longer than planned." She told him. Hiccup smiled at her before kissing her.

"It'll be a boy." Hiccup told her. Astrid laughed.

"I'm not pregnant yet." She told him.

"Well let's change that." He told her smirking. Astrid blushed kissing him.

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She grabbed his pillow pulling it to her and hugging it and smelling his scent and cried herself silently to sleep.

It was the next morning and Astrid woke up and noticed a blanket on her that she didn't remember putting on herself. She could tell by the light that it was probably mid-morning. She sat up and looked around the room. She heard the kids awake downstairs and got up and headed down the stairs.

She heard someone in the kitchen and saw Valka making something. Valka heard the steps and turned around to see Astrid.

"Good morning, I figured I'd come by today." Valka told her. Astrid tried to smile at her but it disappeared quickly. She sat down at the table and Valka gave her some tea. Astrid looked over at the kids and they were playing together.

There was only a couple of people that walked into their house whenever. Valka was one of them as well as Heather. Sometimes even Gobber.

"The village?" Astrid asked quietly.

"Gobber and Heather are taking care of things. You need rest too you know." Valka told her. Valka could tell Astrid was in rough shape. She had dark circles under her eyes from the lack of sleep. Her hair wasn't done the usual way, Astrid was lucky if she got her hair in a braid most of the time now. She looked pale and all the light she usually had was gone from her. Valka knew she was being strong for the kids and that running the village was a distraction for her. She even looked thinner then usual. Valka was worried about her.

"Maybe you should go see the healer, just for a check up. Get you out of the house." Valka suggested.

Astrid looked at her and came to a realization. She nodded. "Yeah." She said it so quietly it was like a whisper.

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Astrid went the long way around to the healers. She didn't want anyone seeing her, let alone asking how she was doing. That's what everyone did now. They saw her as a weak, depressed single mother and cheiftess. Not the strong warrior and general she had been her entire life. All people wanted to do was ask how she was.

She got to the healers and knocked on the door quietly. A women around Astrid's age opened it and gave Astrid a small smile.

"I was wondering when you would come by." Linnea said. Astrid raised an eyebrow.

"Oh? You were expecting me?" Astrid asked. She nodded and let Astrid in. Linnea led Astrid to a private room and shut the door as Astrid took a seat on the bed.

"I was. Just to check on you. Do you want to talk about how you're doing?" Linnea asked. Astrid sighed.

"Not great. I just never thought I'd lose him. Especially the way I did. But I was hoping you could do a check up. It's a long shot and I could be too early. But I might be pregnant." Astrid told her.

"Oh? Why do you think that?" Linnea asked and wrote it down in her notebook.

"The night before, we..." Astrid sighed. "We decided to try for one more. I know that it's not likely since it was our first time trying but I just..." Astrid sighed again.

"You're hoping you still have a part of him." Linnea said. Astrid nodded. "Well, we can test you in a few weeks, we'll get a more accurate result that way. But for the time being, how is your sleeping and everything?"

"It's fine. I don't get a lot. But it's manageable. Between running the village and the kids." Astrid told her.

"Well I'll give you a calming herb for tea that should help you sleep. I advise you to take a break, take a few days off and don't do anything. No village, have someone help you with the kids. You need to rest too." Linnea told her. "Are you drinking at all?"

Astrid looked down at the question. "What Vikings don't drink?" She said. Linnea sighed.

"You know what I mean. Astrid I've known you for a long time, you've never been a big drinker. But when something like this happens its stressful and you want to keep yourself calm and that usually means drinking." Linnea told her.

Astrid looked at her. "So?"

"So, no drinking." Linnea told her. "Besides if you are pregnant, you shouldn't be drinking anyway."

Astrid nodded at her and Linnea went to get the herbs for her. 

Astrid came back home and it was quiet. She noticed that Valka had left with the kids, but had cleaned the house first. It was spotless. Astrid smiled a little to herself before it disappeared again. She went back upstairs to her room and shut the door and crawled back into her bed. 

If she couldn't drink her thoughts away, maybe she could sleep them off. 

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Another month had passed without the great Chief of Berk. Most of the village had gotten back to normal by now. Even Astrid's friends seemed to be back to their normal selves, although they still missed him. Astrid even noticed Valka seemed to be her normal self. But I guess if it was easy for someone, it would be easy for Valka. 

Astrid on the other hand seemed to only get worse. She had become more numb as time passed. Almost as if she was just there. She would manage to get around the house or do some things for the village, but she didn't really talk to anyone anymore. Did what she had too and would go home, she tried to be there for the kids. She would still make them dinner and sit there with them as they each rambled about what they did that day with their friends. Astrid did her best to interact and let them know she cared. Which she did, but taking care of two kids while she constantly felt defeated and running a village was a lot harder when she wasn't herself. 

Astrid had gotten the kids to bed and asleep and made herself some tea and sat on their couch in front of the fireplace. She had another visit with the healer and although she was happy to know she still had another part of Hiccup. She had no idea how she was going to manage three kids and a village. Especially one being a baby. There was a knock at the door and Astrid got up to answer it. 

"Heather?" She said seeing her best friend. "What are you doing here?" 

"Astrid, I'm your best friend. Although you've been avoiding me, I'm still here for you. We all are." Heather told her and walked inside. Astrid watched her walk inside and shut the door. She went and sat back down and Heather joined her. 

"So, do you wanna talk about it?" Heather asked her. 

"Talk about what? How I've fallen apart without him? I use to think I didn't need anyone, I just wanted to be the best warrior. That's all that mattered. I never thought about getting married or kids until Hiccup. He was the one I knew I would be able to get through it with. Now he's gone. I have to raise all three of them alone. The one won't even get to know him." Astrid rambled facing the fireplace. Heather raised an eyebrow. 

"Three?" Heather asked. Astrid blinked and looked at her friend and nodded. "You're pregnant?" Heather asked. 

"Yeah. I'm surprised actually. We had talked about it and then just got busy with the village and life and the other two. Then it came up again the night before, so we tried. The other two took more than once." Astrid smirked to herself and Heather smirked a little. 

"Maybe the gods knew you would need one more." Heather told her. Astrid smiled a little. 

"Maybe." Astrid sighed. They were quiet for a moment. "I just don't know how I'm gonna manage it. It's going to be hard without him." 

"I know, but you have Valka and me and everyone else. We will all help you. You're not alone in this Astrid. Hiccup is with you too. You know that." Heather told her best friend. Astrid wiped a tear that escaped from her eye. She hated crying in front of people, even Heather. Astrid got up. 

"I think I'm gonna try and sleep." She told her. 

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Heather asked. Astrid shook her head. 

"I'll be fine. Thank you though." Astrid told her friend. Heather got up and hugged Astrid and then left. Astrid locked the front door and headed upstairs to go to her room. It still felt extra cold and dark in there. Like the light Hiccup brought to her life was gone forever. Astrid opened a chest and pulled out one of Hiccup's red tunics. She held it against her, breathing in his scent. There she went crying again. She knew her hormones were out of whack as well so she just blamed it on that. She got undressed and put the tunic on herself and then crawled into her bed and let sleep overtake her. 

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Another month had passed and Astrid was around three months pregnant at this point. She had only told Heather, Valka, Gobber and her own parents. Giving them strict rules not to tell anyone else and she would announce it when she was ready. She wanted to tell the village but at the same time she was worried some would accuse her of being with another man after Hiccup had passed. The timing lined up, but she knew some people would find it hard to believe. But that was there problem and she knew they would be proven wrong once she had the baby. 

She had a small bump and was wearing one of her tunics she wore while pregnant with the others. Valka had come over to watch the kids so Astrid could go see Linnea. Astrid walked through the village and greeted some villagers. She got to the healer's hut and went inside calling for Linnea. 

"I'm in here." Linnea called from the back room. Astrid followed the sound of her voice and came into the room shutting the door. "Hey Astrid." 

"Hi." Astrid greeted back sitting down in the chair across from Linnea's desk. 

"How are you feeling?" Linnea asked. 

"I'm okay. I've been a little nauseas but nothing too bad." Astrid told her. Linnea stood up and walked over to her. 

"You look like you've lost more weight. Are you eating well?" Linnea asked. She had noticed Astrid's drop in weight after Hiccup's passing. Which made sense, but if she still wasn't eating much, that wasn't good. 

"I don't feel hungry most of the time. I'm still working through it." Astrid told her. Linnea sighed a little and nodded. 

"I know it's been hard, Astrid. I get it, when you feel like this, you don't want to eat much. But you have another person to think about. You're still working through grief, and I would hate to see you go through more just because you aren't taking care of yourself properly. If you aren't eating enough, or sleeping enough, or you're doing too much work. You're going to throw your body out of it's habit and cause your body stress. That's not good for you or the baby, and you could even lose it. I know you don't want that." Linnea told her. Astrid sighed and nodded. 

"I'll do better. I need to get back to being myself anyway." Astrid told her. Linnea gave her some herbs for the sickness and Astrid headed back home. 

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A couple more weeks passed and Astrid was starting to show. She had called the village to The Great Hall to make the announcement and was still worried about how some of them would take it. Valka was there with her and Astrid looked at her. 

"What do I even tell them? What if they're angry or think it's not Hiccups." Astrid swallowed nervously. "I've never been so nervous about something." 

"It will be fine, love. Everyone knows how loyal you were to him. Hiccup would want you to share it." Valka told her. Astrid smiled a little. 

"I wish he knew. He always wanted three kids." Astrid told her. Valka smiled. 

"He knows." Valka told her and looked to see that everyone was inside. "You ready?" Astrid sighed and nodded. 

Valka went up in front of everyone first and quieted them down. "Alright, I know we haven't heard from Astrid much lately, but she is still our chieftess and she has an announcement for all of you." Valka looked over at Astrid and Astrid walked up to where Valka was. Astrid looked out to among everyone in the village. She took a breath. 

"I'm happy to announce that I'm expecting again. The baby should arrive in the winter at some point. Thank you." Astrid told them. 

There was silence around the hall. Astrid heard whispers. She looked at Valka. 

"Is it Hiccups?!" Someone yelled from somewhere in the hall. Which caused more whispers and now everyone was staring at Astrid. 

"Yes, of course. I just didn't know until after he-" She stopped herself. "It is Hiccups. If you believe that or not is your decision, but when I have this baby, it will be taught that Hiccup was the most amazing husband, father, and Chief that we ever had, and changed our entire lives for the better; this baby will be the last part any of us have of Hiccup. I can't wait to meet him or her." Astrid told the village and then walked away and left. 

Heather saw her leave and looked down to Zephyr and Nuffink who were standing with her. Zephyr looked up at Heather. 

"Why do people think it's not daddy's." Zephyr asked Heather. Heather knelt down and looked at her. 

"People just doubt things sometimes, but your mommy knows, and grandma knows, and all of us - her friends, and you and Nuffink. That's what matters." Heather told her. Zephyr nodded and grabbed Nuffink's hand and they went with Heather. 

Heather opened the door to the Haddock hut and the kids went inside and Astrid was sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace. Astrid saw the kids go upstairs and Heather walked over and sat down. 

"So?" Heather started. Astrid looked at her. 

"I don't care what they think. If they think I would've slept with some random person after he died, that's there issue." Astrid looked back at the fireplace. 

"Zephyr asked me why people think it's not Hiccups." Heather told her. Astrid sighed. 

"I feel like it's been harder on her then it's been on me. She adored him. Hiccup was so good with her, always helping her build things and invent things." Astrid smiled a little remembering the two of them together. "She didn't even believe me when I first told her." 

"That he was gone?" Heather asked. Astrid nodded. 

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They had told Astrid that no one had told the kids yet. Astrid had gotten up, leaving Hiccup's lifeless body there on the ground. She knew the others would take him away until they could have a proper send off for him. Astrid walked towards their hut and saw the kids playing outside with some of their friends. Laughing and smiling. She was about to give them the worst news of their short lives. 

She walked over still in her old dragon scale armor that they still used for battles. Covered in dirt and blood - mostly Hiccup's. Not realizing it was on her face as well. 

"Mom!" Zephyr called running over and hugging her. Astrid smiled a little and hugged her. 

"Hi sweetie, can you go get your brother. I have to tell you something." Astrid said to her. Zephyr looked at her mother's face and furrowed her eyebrows and then walked away to go get Nuffink. Astrid sat down on the steps to their porch and put her helmet down. The kids came back over and Nuffink sat down beside Astrid and Zephyr stood in front of them. Astrid looked at them. 

"Where's dad?" Zephyr asked looking around for Hiccup. She looked back at Astrid seeing that something was wrong. Zephyr wasn't stupid, she might only be ten, but she was smarter than her own good. "Where's dad?!" She raised her voice a little. Nuffink looked at Astrid too. 

"You're daddy was hurt in the battle today, badly, and we couldn't save him in time." Astrid looked at Nuffink and Zephyr. She watched Zephyr's face change to concern and her eyebrows furrowed. 

"Is he dead?" Zephyr asked her mom. Astrid looked at her daughter and reached for her. Zephyr backed away from her. "You're lying! Where is he?!" Zephyr yelled. 

"He's gone sweetheart. I'm so sorry." Astrid told her. Zephyr felt her breathing escalate, and tears fill her eyes and she looked around, and it was like nothing made sense in her brain. Astrid got up and went to her and grabbed Zephyr's arms. "Sweetie, look at me." Zephyr pulled away from her. 

"Don't touch me!" Zephyr had tears streaming down her bright red cheeks now and Astrid was a blur in her vision. Zephyr let out a sob. "You're lying!" 

"Zephyr-" Astrid started and Zephyr ran off from her. "Zephyr!" Astrid sighed and watched her run into the woods. Astrid turned around and knelt down to Nuffink. Nuffink sniffed a little. "Come here, sweetie." Astrid said to him and reached for him. Nuffink wrapped his arms around Astrid's neck and buried his face against her and cried. Astrid held him close as her own tears fell again. "I'm so sorry, honey." She told him. 

Astrid was sitting on the porch holding Nuffink when Valka came up to them. 

"Where's Zephyr?" Valka asked looking around. Astrid looked at her mother-in-law. 

"She ran off into the woods when I told her. She thinks I'm lying... I couldn't leave him here." Astrid told her glancing at Nuffink. Valka put her hands out and took Nuffink from Astrid. Nuffink hugged his grandma. 

"Go find her." Valka told her. Astrid nodded and got up from the step and headed in the direction she saw Zephyr go. Valka brought Nuffink inside. Astrid got into the woods and she knew some areas Zephyr liked to go and had probably checked two or three of them already. She was coming up to a fort that Hiccup had help the kids make once. It was still standing strong, not surprising if Hiccup had built it. Astrid got close to it and heard faint crying. 

"Bug?" Astrid called using Zephyr's nickname. 

"Go away!" Zephyr sobbed. Astrid sighed and went into the fort and Zephyr was sitting against the wall with her knees to her chest and her arms wrapped around her legs. Zephyr looked up at Astrid. "I don't want to talk." 

Astrid sat beside her and pulled her daughter onto her lap and held her. "We don't have too. But you do need to know that daddy loves you, even from Valhalla." Astrid told her. Zephyr laid her head against Astrid and Astrid kissed her daughters head. 

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"Hiccup and her were really close." Heather said. Astrid nodded. 

"Nuffink misses him too, but it's different. I think he's just too little for it to really sink into him the way it did to Zephyr. This one-" Astrid looked down at her bump. "they won't even get to meet him." 

"But we can tell them all the stories about him. There's plenty of those. I'm sure you have some that I haven't even heard yet." Heather smiled at Astrid. 

"Please, you're my best friend, I've told you everything about him and I." Astrid blushed a little. 

"Well, I should probably go home to my own kids." Heather got up from the couch and Astrid stood up and walked with her to the door. 

"Tell them Aunt Astrid says hi." 

"Of course." Heather smiled and headed out. 

Astrid closed and locked the door. She put the fire down and went upstairs and checked on the kids. Zephyr was reading a story to Nuffink and Astrid smiled at them. She walked into the room and picked Nuffink up and sat down beside Zephyr and put Nuffink on her lap. Zephyr stopped reading and looked at her. 

"Keep going." Astrid told her. Zephyr smiled a little and continue to read the story in the book. One of the many adventures Astrid and the gang had when they were younger. Hiccup had written them all down in separate notebooks as separate stories. Zephyr would read them on her own or to Nuffink, and the other kids in the village. 

When Zephyr finished, Astrid walked Nuffink over to his bed on the other side of the room and laid him down tucking him in. She handed him his stuffed dragon that looked like a Stormcutter. He loved Valka's stories about Cloudjumper and Valka had made him a stuffed dragon to look like the dragon. Nuffink took and snuggled it. Zephyr put the book back on her shelf above her bed and got up. 

"Mom." Zephyr looked at Astrid. Astrid looked at her. 

"Yes bug?" 

"Can I sleep with you tonight?" She asked. She was holding her Night Fury stuffed dragon that Astrid had made with the help of Valka, when she was pregnant with Zephyr. 

"Of course you can sweetheart." Astrid smiled at her. They went downstairs for a while before bedtime and Astrid sat at the table going through some work for the village that needed to get done. It was starting to get later and Astrid and Zephyr headed up to bed. They went into Astrid's bedroom and Zephyr climbed up onto Hiccup's side. Astrid laid down on her side and looked at Zephyr. Zephyr was flicking one of the ears on her stuffed dragon. 

"Do you think dad is with the dragons?" Zephyr asked. Astrid ran her fingers through her daughters auburn colored hair. 

"Absolutely. He loved them and dragons loved your dad too." Zephyr looked up at Astrid. 

"What about Toothless?"

"What about him?" Astrid asked with a slight smile at the mention of the dragon. 

"Does he know that dad died?" Astrid took a moment to answer.

"I think he knows. I think Toothless can feel it, kind of like me. I feel like a part of me is missing now without your dad. Toothless and your dad had a very deep connection, so I think Toothless feels like somethings missing too." Astrid told her daughter. Zephyr laid on her back and looked at the ceiling. 

"Why did there have to be mean people who wanted to kill dragons. I want a dragon." Zephyr sighed. 

"Maybe you will someday. But for now you need to sleep, so maybe you can dream about them." Astrid told her. Zephyr turned on her side again and faced Astrid. Astrid kissed her forehead. "Goodnight bug." 

"Goodnight mommy." Zephyr closed her eyes and Astrid continued to run her fingers through Zephyr's head, eventually falling asleep herself. 

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 Astrid was six months along and was lying in her bed and staring at the ceiling with a hand on her baby bump. She sighed and looked down at it. 

"Go to sleep. I can't sleep unless you stop moving." She told the baby inside her. She turned on her side and felt the baby kick her again in protest.  Astrid did her best to try and sleep and woke up in the morning to the sound of the kids fighting downstairs. Astrid sat up slowly and used the bedpost too help herself to stand. 

"No Nuffink! Stop it! I'm making you breakfast - mom is sleeping, just sit down at the table." Zephyr was telling her brother sounding annoyed and frustrated. 

"I don't want you to make my breakfast - you make it wrong!" Nuffink told his sister. 

Astrid walked out of her room and made it to the stairs and started coming down. "Guys, stop fighting." She told the kids. 

"We aren't fighting." Zephyr told her mom. "I'm just making breakfast." She got down from her stool and put three plates on the table of bread with jam on it. Nuffink climbed onto his chair and looked at the bread and jam and saw it was cut into triangles. 

"You made it right." He told Zephyr.  She smiled at him. 

"I've been watching mom make it for a long time you know." Zephyr told her brother while sitting in  her own chair. 

Astrid got to the table and sat down as well. "Thank you Zephyr." She told her daughter and Zephyr smiled at her and started eating her breakfast.  Valka came inside the house as they were finishing up eating. 

"Hi Valka, what are you doing here?" Astrid asked her mother-in-law. 

"I was gonna take the kids and drop Nuffink off with Heather and take Zephyr with me around the village. You need days off to you know." Valka told her. 

Astrid smiled a little. "You don't have to do that. I can manage." She said yawning and standing up. Zephyr looked at Astrid. 

"Mom, go back to bed. You always told us to have a nap when we're tired." Zephyr told her. Astrid smiled at her daughter and looked at Valka. 

"Are you sure?" Astrid asked. Valka smiled and nodded. 

"It's fine." Valka told her. Nuffink ran to the living room and grabbed his stuffed dragon off the floor. Zephyr grabbed his hand and they went outside and waited for Valka to join them. Astrid put the plates in their wash-bin while Valka went outside with the kids. Astrid watched them out the window until they were out of site. She went back upstairs to her room and hung up the black sheet she had in front of the window to block out the daylight and went back to bed, to hopefully sleep more. 

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Valka and Zephyr brought Nuffink to Heathers and then continued on walking in the village. 

"You're birthday is coming up, are you excited?" Valka asked Zephyr. Zephyr sighed a little. 

"I don't know. I want to be, but mom has been so busy with the village and the new baby coming. I don't know if she even remembers. I don't want to celebrate it without dad. He always made my birthdays special and they won't be like that anymore." Zephyr told her grandma. 

"We can still celebrate. It can just be small. Don't worry, your mom won't forget about your birthday." Valka told her. Zephyr smiled a little and they continued to walk to the Great Hall. 

Zephyr didn't want to tell her grandma that she felt like her mom was forgetting about her in general, let alone might forget her birthday. Zephyr had noticed Astrid not paying as much attention lately, unless it had to do with Nuffink, the village or about the baby that was coming. It was partly why Zephyr had started making breakfast for them, hoping her mom would start paying more attention to her again. She was going to be eleven, she was growing up and she had always thought getting older would make her closer with her mom and dad. But now that her dad was gone, and Astrid was running the village and the family, Zephyr realized over the last couple months that her getting closer might not happen, especially with a new sibling around. 

But she was a Viking, and if her parents taught her anything about being a Viking it was being strong and independent and making sure no-one ever saw you be weak. So that's what she was going to do. Be strong and independent and not let her mom know anything was bothering her. 

Zephyr and Valka entered the the Great Hall and Zephyr saw her friends sitting at a table and looked at Valka. Valka smiled at her and nodded and Zephyr ran over to sit with them, they were playing with marbles. They said hi to her and Aren looked at her. 

"You okay?" He asked her. She nodded. 

"Yeah, can I play?" She asked. 

"Sure." Aren said and grabbed a marble for her. Zephyr took it and Aren set up their makeshift net for the marbles that they would keep track of points with. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was about two weeks later and Astrid was sitting in the living room making something for Zephyr. It was her eleventh birthday the next day and Astrid was trying to make it special, like Hiccup always had. She found some of Hiccup's old leather and was making a new kransen for Zephyr.  She had sewn it together and was carving a design into it and pressing some circle metal pieces around it. She was hoping Zephyr would like it. Especially since it was being made from something that was Hiccups. 

Astrid heard something and put her work down and covered it with a blanket and looked up seeing Zephyr. 

"Hey bug." Astrid said as Zephyr came over and climbed up beside Astrid. "You excited for tomorrow?" Zephyr shrugged. 

"I don't know. I guess. It's gonna be different without him." Zephyr sighed. Astrid pulled Zephyr close to her. 

"I know, daddy always made your birthday special." Astrid told her daughter. "Is there anything you want to do tomorrow?" 

Zephyr shook her head. "No. Just with you guys and grandma is fine." 

"Not even your friends? Maya, Aren, Noah and Nesryn?" Astrid asked. 

"Maybe, I might see them during the day. I just don't want to do a lot." Zephyr said and laid her head against Astrid. Astrid sighed and ran her hand through Zephyr's hair. 

"Do you want me to braid your hair?" Astrid asked her. Zephyr look up at her and nodded. She got up and moved to be in front of Astrid and  Astrid smiled a little and started to braid her daughters hair. Astrid finished and Zephyr hugged her and then went back upstairs to her room. 

Astrid pulled out her supplies to continue making Zephyr's gift. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was the next day and Astrid got up and was making breakfast. She had Zephyr's gift in a small box and wrapped for her, sitting on the table. Nuffink came down first and climbed into his chair. Zephyr came down a few minutes later and Nuffink looked at her.

"Happy Birthday Zeph!" Nuffink said to her. Zephyr smiled at him while she sat down. 

"Thanks, Nuff." She told him. Nuffink handed her a little box and Zephyr took it from him. She opened it and looked at it. It was a little metal carving of a dragon. A Night Fury. 

"Gobber helped me make it. It's like Toothless, like your stuffed one." Nuffink told his sister excitedly. Zephyr smiled at him. 

"Thank you Nuffink, I love it." She looked at the little statue and noted the details Gobber had put into it. She knew her dad would've loved it too. He probably would've made it with Nuffink too. 

Astrid put the kids breakfast in front of them. She made some special pastry for breakfast with fresh berries on it. Zephyr's eyes lit up when she saw it. She dug into it. Astrid sat down to eat hers with them. When they were done, Astrid gave Zephyr her gift. 

"Happy Birthday bug." Astrid told her. Zephyr smiled at her and opened it. Zephyr pulled out the kransen and looked at Astrid. 

"A new one? It's beautiful, but why a new one?" Zephyr asked. Astrid smiled.

"I made it out of some of your dads old leathers. That way you always have him with you." Astrid told her. Zephyr smiled and hugged her. 

"Thank you mom. I love it." She told her. Astrid hugged her and kissed her head. 

Later that day, they had Valka and Gobber and a couple of Zephyr's friends over for her. She was wearing the kransen Astrid made for her. Zephyr was showing Aren the carving Nuffink gave her, and Aren had given her some notebooks, knowing she liked to draw. 

After everyone left again, Zephyr was laying in Astrid's bed with her. It was late. Astrid was running her hands through Zephyr's hair and Zephyr was half asleep. 

"Did you have a good day?" Astrid asked. Zephyr nodded. 

"Yeah, better than I thought it would be. But still not the same. I'm sure I'll get use to it though." Zephyr said and yawned. Astrid smiled a little and kissed her head. 

"Go to sleep bug. I need to sleep too." Astrid told her. Zephyr sighed and closed her eyes holding her stuffed dragon close. Astrid also let sleep overtake her. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
 
Another couple of months had passed and Astrid was due soon, any day really with this baby. Valka and Heather and others had helped her get the old cradle they had had for the other two kids out from the storage space Hiccup had put it in. They cleaned it and got it prepared in Astrid's room for when she had the baby. 

Astrid had found the kids old baby clothes as well and had them out along with some blankets and furs Valka had given her. Valka also gave her another stuffed dragon, a Deadly Nadder this time for the baby and Astrid smiled at it remembering Stormfly and thanked her. Astrid put it in the cradle and had gone through some of Hiccup's clothes and picked a few she felt she could part with and made a small blanket for each of the kids to have, and put the one for the baby also in the cradle. 

Astrid was searching through Hiccup's desk that was still in their bedroom. She found the notebook she was looking for and sat on the bed and opened it. She ran her hands over the words 'Baby Names' in Hiccup's hand writing. Then over the words of 'Hiccup'. They had made the list when Astrid found out she was pregnant with Zephyr. Astrid had picked their daughters name, and Hiccup had picked Nuffink. It was the first one of his list with the word 'boy' beside it. 

She felt tears come to her eyes and tried to blink them away as she read down his side of the list trying to find a boy name option and a girl name option for the baby she was about to have. She figured that was at least one way she could keep Hiccup involved with the birth of the child, was giving it a name he had loved. 

"Mom?" Astrid heard her daughter's voice and sniffed a little wiping tears from her cheeks before turning around to see her daughter at the door of the bedroom. "Are you okay?" Zephyr asked her. 

"I'll be fine sweetie. Just missing your dad." Astrid told her closing the notebook and putting it down on the bed. Astrid got up and walked to the door. "What are you and your brother up too?" 

"Well, we were going to ask if we could go outside. Aren and Maya asked me and Nuffink wants to come." Zephyr said a little annoyed. "But once he sees his friends he'll probably go play with them. 

Astrid and Zephyr made their way downstairs and Astrid nodded. "Sure, you guys don't need to ask to go out, just let me know if you're going. Alright?" Astrid told her. Zephyr nodded. 

"Okay mom. Thanks." She hugged her and Astrid smiled at her daughter and watched her go out to the deck where Nuffink was waiting and they went down the stairs to find their friends. Astrid watched them from the door and smiled a little while putting her hand on her swollen belly. 

"You'll be running around with them soon enough." Astrid told the baby that was kicking her insides repeatedly. 

                                                                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a few days later and the middle of the night and Astrid was wide awake staring at the ceiling. She couldn't sleep and she'd been feeling a low pressure all day, she knew that she was probably having some small contractions but she didn't want to worry anyone just yet and if it was false labor, she would feel awful about waking up her mother, Valka and the healer for her. 

Valka had insisted that her and Astrid's mom start sleeping at Astrid's house in case she did go into labor during the night. So Astrid's mother and mother-in-law were sleeping in the spare room. Astrid sighed and sat up feeling the pressure again. She stood up and walked towards the bedroom door opening it and made her way slowly down the stairs. She grabbed a small cast iron kettle and filled it with water and hung it over the small embers of the fire and added a log to the fire to heat up the water to make a cup of tea. Astrid sat down on the couch after she had made her tea and slowly sipped at it. Hoping it would help her sleep.  

Ida - Astrid's mom was making her way down the stairs and saw her daughter sitting on the couch. She walked over and Astrid looked up at her. 

"You alright, Unnasta?" Ida said to her daughter. Astrid smiled a little at her mother using the old language to call her 'sweetheart'.  She nodded a little. 

"Yeah, just couldn't sleep. I've been having pain all day, but I can't tell if it's actual labor or not. You'd think I'd be able to know after the other two." She told her mother and looked back to the fire and sighed. Ida sat down beside her daughter. 

"Have you given any thought into what we talked about before?" Her mother asked. Astrid sighed. Remembering their conversation from a couple weeks before. Her mother had asked if Astrid was interested in finding a new husband and Astrid had gotten extremely defensive and told her mother off about how she could think like that when Hiccup had only been gone for less than a year and when she was pregnant with his child. No man would want her with that situation, as well as two other young kids. 

That aside, she knew her mother had good intentions when she brought it up. To have someone help her with the children and to love her. But Astrid didn't want anyone else to love her. Hiccup had more than enough love for the both of them and had been in love with her a lot longer than she had been with him. Astrid knew that. She knew that the love Hiccup had for her would last long after they both went to Valhalla. She couldn't ever bring herself to be with another man. She didn't want too. She knew she wouldn't find anyone like Hiccup. 

"I can't do it mom." Astrid told her. "I know that's not what you want to hear. But I'm going to do this myself. He would of, if it was the other way around." 

Ida sighed and nodded. 

"Besides, between you and Valka, and Heather and everyone else. I have plenty of help." Astrid told her mother. 

They sat in silence for a little while until Astrid put a hand on her swollen belly and braced herself on the couch. Ida sat up and put her hand on her daughters shoulder. Astrid had a wave of pain and her mom stood up. 

"Alright, we need to get you up to your bed. You're clearly having contractions." Ida told her daughter and helped Astrid stand. Astrid breathed hard and slowly, stopping a few times from contractions, made her way back up to her room. Ida had moved the pillows so Astrid could sit up properly and Astrid just leaned over the chair at Hiccup's desk. Ida told her she'd be right back and went to get Valka so she could bring the kids to Heathers and get Linnea, while Ida stayed with Astrid. 

Astrid let out a groan and gripped the chair hard. 

"Astrid, come to the bed." Her mother told her. 

"In...a...minute." Astrid said between breaths. The contractions stopped and Astrid walked to the bed and slowly got onto it and laid back against the pillows. 

A few more minutes went by and Valka returned with Linnea, and Heather showed up a few minutes later after having got Zephyr and Nuffink settled back to sleep at her house with Fishlegs there. 

Astrid had wanted Heather there. If she couldn't have Hiccup, at least she had Heather.  Linnea was at the end of the bed and Ida and Valka were getting bucket of water and towels and furs ready for her. 

Astrid was hoping this was quick. It was her third after all, but it's also been almost seven years since she's given birth. Not to mention, she was worried. Both her other births had some complications. Zephyr was born a little early and wasn't breathing when she first was delivered and they had rushed to get her clean to and when they heard her little scream, it was music to their ears. 

Nuffink was late, clearly wasn't planning on getting out and when he did, Astrid had some complications afterwards and Hiccup had been given their son as they tended to her. 

Astrid was hoping this one was easy and smooth. But she knew that probably wouldn't be likely. As much as she wanted this baby out, she was over the pregnancy. But she still wanted to keep this baby safe inside her. She didn't want anything to happen to them. 

Heather stood by her friends side and held Astrid's hand. Ida was on the other side with a small bucket of water and cloth to keep Astrid cool during the process. Astrid felt another contraction and groaned a little. She squeezed Heather's hand.

It had been probably an hour or two and Linnea was checking her again. 

"She's not dilated enough." Linnea said shaking her head. Astrid groaned in frustration and laid her head back against the pillow. She was already feeling exhausted and Linnea was dealing with some blood loss already. Which wasn't good. Ida dabbed Astrid's head with the cloth and was humming. Astrid already felt like she was losing her strength. 

Another hour past and Astrid was letting out a scream as she pushed until Linnea told her to stop. Valka had a look of concern on her face and Astrid was pale and sweaty and cold blood was on the bed beneath her and on her. Heather could see Astrid wanting to give up. 

"Astrid..."  a male voice said. Astrid looked around the best she could recognizing the voice. 

"Hiccup?" She said quietly and she looked towards Heather seeing her green eyes. Heather squeezed her friends hand. 

"You're okay. You got this. You need to stay awake. The kids can't lose you too." Heather said to her best friend. "None of us can." 

"Astrid..." She heard his voice calling her again. Astrid had pushed again and felt the baby leave her and heard a scream. Linnea had the baby in a towel and cut the cord quickly before handing the baby off to Valka. Valka brought her new grandchild to the bin of warmed water to bathe them. Astrid had watched the blur of her baby be moved around and heard Linnea's voice saying something about 'too much blood' before closing her eyes and passing out. Heather panicked a little. Valka had Ida take over bathing the newborn. 

"Astrid, wake up. You need to stay." Heather said to her friend. Valka was trying to help Linnea stop the bleeding. 

                                                                                                ~~~~

"Hiccup?" Astrid called out. She was standing in an empty room, it was dark and cold. She felt someone touch her shoulder. She caught her breath and turned around to see Hiccup standing there with that soft smile on his face that she loved. "Hiccup!" 

She hugged him and Hiccup smiled and hugged her. Holding her close. 

"I miss you." She told him. "So much. The kids miss you, and the village. It's not the same without you." 

She looked up at him and Hiccup lifted a hand to wipe the tears off her face. "I miss you all too."

"Can I come with you?" Astrid asked him. Hiccup smiled gently at his wife. 

"Why would you want to do that?" He asked her. 

"I need you. I've always needed you. I'm the person I am because of you. It's different now. I'm not myself anymore. I need you to stay, or I need to go." She felt herself choke on a sob. Hiccup's eyes turned a little sad. 

"But what about everyone else? And our kids? They need you." Hiccup moved some of her hair behind her ear. He looked over her shoulder, like he was watching something. He looked back at Astrid. "Come M'lady." 

Hiccup took her hand and Astrid turned to walk with him to where he was looking. They walked through... nothing, but were now standing in their house. In the bedroom. With Astrid watching herself on the bed, passed out, while Linnea was packing towels to stop the bleeding, while Valka helped her. Her mother, Ida was wrapping their new baby up in some furs and comforting them. Heather, her best friend, besides Hiccup, was there at her side. Holding her hand and telling her to wake up, that they needed her, that her kids needed her. They can't lose both of their parents. Not like this. Heather was doing what Hiccup would've been doing at Astrid's side. 

Hiccup looked over to the baby and smiled. "He's perfect." Astrid looked at him. 

"He? It's a boy." She said. Hiccup nodded. "You knew?" She asked him. 

"Of course I knew. I've been with you the entire time." He turned to his wife and took her hands in his. "Astrid, I've been there every second since I died. You know that don't you?" 

Astrid looked up at his green eyes with tears brimming on her blue ones. "I wanted too. But it was hard." Hiccup frowned a little. 

"I've seen everything M'lady. After I died, I watched you from the side as you threw yourself over me and yelled at everyone. I saw you tell our children, and I followed Zephyr to our fort in the woods when she ran off. I watched you find her and comfort her. I was there watching you drink and sleep on the couch or with the kids; because you couldn't sleep in our bed afterwards." 

Astrid had tears on her cheeks. "Everything? When I found out I was pregnant? Zephyr's birthday?" Hiccup nodded. 

"Everything. I always will be." He told her. Astrid looked back at the scene before her and back at her husband. "I'm still here M'lady. I always will be. For you, for the kids. All of them. I know you'll tell this one every story about us." 

Astrid smiled a little. "Of course. They love those stories." 

They stood there for a moment until Astrid asked. "Does Toothless know that you're...?" She couldn't finish her sentence. Hiccup looked at her. 

"I think he does. I've seen him too. Bring them again, someday. I don't want them to forget." Hiccup told her. Astrid nodded. 

"I promise." She hugged him. Hiccup hugged her. "I picked a name from your list." She told him. "I wanted you to have something to do with the birth. So I found our baby name list and picked one from your choices." Hiccup kissed her forehead. 

"Good. That way you know I'm always there too." Hiccup looked back at the scene and back to Astrid. "You need to go back." He told her. "They're getting more worried by the minute that you're gone." Astrid looked down. 

"I need more time with you." Hiccup lifted her chin to look at her gently. 

"I'm still here, Astrid. I'm not going anywhere. There will always be a Hiccup and Astrid." 

"Always." She finished for him, smiling at the memory of the forest on the edge. She couldn't see the the memory since she had been blind at the time. But she still remembered the feeling and the words. 

"Tell the kids I love them and miss them." 

"I will." 

"I love you M'lady." Hiccup told her. 

"I love you Hiccup." Astrid kissed his cheek before he disappeared in front of her. She looked back at the bed where she laid and walked towards it. 

                                                                                              ~~~~~

Astrid opened her eyes and looked around locking her eyes on the bundle of fur in mother's arms. 

"Give." She said faintly. Causing all four women to look at her surprised. Heather sighed in relief. Ida gave Astrid the baby and Linnea started taking the multiple bloodied towels away slowly to make sure Astrid had stopped bleeding completely. 

"You fainted dear, we thought..." Valka started. Astrid was staring at her son who had dark-grey eyes, but she knew, she knew they would turn to Hiccup's green ones. He had a head full of dark hair and Astrid noted the resemblance to the baby's father, the nose, the freckles. She kissed his head. 

They tended to her as she sat up more and fed the new baby in her arms. Heather was helping them clean up as well and came over to her friend. Astrid looked at her. 

"Thank you." She told her. "For being here." Heather smiled. 

"Of course." She looked at the baby. "He looks like Hiccup." Astrid smiled and nodded. 

"I saw him. We talked." She looked at Heather. Heather looked at her confused. "When I was bleeding and past out. I saw him." 

"See, he's always around." Heather told her. Astrid looked past Heather to an empty space in the room and smiled a little and nodded. 

"Yeah, he is." She looked back at her son who had fallen asleep in her arms. 

"What about a name?" Heather asked her friend. Which grabbed the attention of the rest of the women and they came over to the bed and looked at Astrid and the new Haddock addition. 

                                                                                 ~~~~~

It was a few days later and Astrid was in a lot better shape. She spent a lot of time sleeping after loosing so much blood during the birth of her third child. Valka and her mother stayed to help her with the kids, who adored their baby brother already. Today they were having an official announcement of the new child to the entire village in the Great Hall. 

Astrid was finishing getting ready herself and Zephyr and Nuffink were outside on the deck waiting for her. Astrid walked over to the cradle where her new son was fast asleep and gently picked him up. Trying her best not to wake him up. He squirmed a little and settled again when Astrid put him on the fur on the bed to wrap him up. It was cold out, they hadn't had their first snow yet, which was odd for this time of year. But it was still cold enough. Astrid picked up her son and headed downstairs out to the deck. 

"Ready mom?!" Zephyr said excitedly. 

"Shh, Zeph. He's sleeping. But yes. Let's go." Astrid told her. Zephyr took Nuffink's hand and they went ahead of Astrid towards the Great Hall. Astrid felt a small gentle sudden breeze that smelled like her late husband. She smiled to herself. 

"I know you're here babe." She said quietly to herself. 

"Mommy! Come on." Nuffink called to her. Astrid looked ahead, seeing they were already at the bottom of the steps. She smiled. 

Hiccup had wanted to make some similarities to Old Berk on New Berk and had decided that the Great Hall should be up high overlooking the village like it had been on the other island. The downfall was that they still had a lot of stairs to climb in order to get to the hall. Thankfully they were all used to it. 

Astrid caught up with her children and they began to walk up the steps together. They entered the Great Hall and made their up to the front on the stage that was a few feet from the ground. Just enough to allow their leader and council to see everyone. Zephyr sat down in Hiccup's - well now Astrid's - chair. Which was way to big for the girl. Nuffink sat beside her and Zephyr put her arms out so Astrid could lay their baby brother in her arms for a few moments. Astrid got the attention of the village and every eye in the room was on her. 

"I've asked you here today to properly introduce the newest member of our family and of Berk." Astrid started. "I know Hiccup would love him with every bit that I do. I know you'll all accept him as a Haddock. With Snoggletog coming up soon, we all know this is a hard time of year for all of us who have lost loved ones. But we still celebrate, and that's what I want to do today. Is celebrate my son, because that's what Hiccup would've wanted. To remind us that he's still here with us." 

Astrid walked over to Zephyr and grabbed her son from the bundle of fur. The baby whining in protest of being disturbed from his sleep. Astrid walked back over and told the kids to join her. Zephyr and Nuffink stood on each side of her. 

"It's with pleasure that I introduce you to our newest member, and his name is Mattis Hiccup Haddock." Astrid announced. The village cheered for the new member of their tribe. 

Astrid had been going around with the Mattis, introducing him to everyone. She glanced over to one of the areas of the Great Hall that Hiccup had dedicated to them - the dragon riders. Some of their armor pieces were displayed with write ups of what they were and how they were made. Banners of their dragons and riders hung above each piece. There was a small statue that Hiccup made, it took him probably a year or more to make, of him and Astrid and Toothless and Stormfly together. Along with some a little smaller of the other dragons and riders displayed on a stand in the center. Astrid walked over to it with Mattis in her arms and he was pretty wide eyed considering he was only a few days old. She was showing him the statues. 

"That's your daddy. He was the bravest, most loving person. He always found the good in everyone and I can't wait to tell you all the stories about him and our adventures. About dragons, if you're anything like him, you'll love them too. You'll see them one day, I promise." She told her son. 

They celebrated in the Great Hall and as it got late, Astrid wrapped Mattis back up in his furs and Valka was carrying a sleeping Nuffink. Zephyr was saying bye to her friends and Astrid saw Zephyr's friend, Aren, hand her something and hug her. She smiled and Zephyr came running over to leave with them. 

"Here mom, Aren said he made it for Mattis." Zephyr placed on the bundle of fur in her mothers arms. It was a small piece of fabric with something of texture inside that made a shaking sound. 

"What is it?" Astrid asked her daughter. 

"I don't know, I think he called it a shaker. Aren also wanted to know if you have any pages of dad's inventions. He wants to look at them." Zephyr smiled at her as they headed down the stairs. Astrid smiled. 

"We'll have to see if we can find them." Astrid told her daughter. 

They headed home and Astrid got all the kids into bed and thanked Valka for bringing Nuffink home too. Valka left to go back to her hut and Astrid made herself a cup of tea before sitting down on the couch with it. After she finished her tea, she dimmed the fire a bit and decided to go up to bed and check on the kids. She made her way up the stairs and she went to go into her room first when she heard Zephyr's voice. 

"Dad?" there was a pause. "Dad!" She sounded scared. 

Astrid walked to her daughters bedroom and slowly opened the door to find Zephyr fast asleep and talking. 

"Dad, don't go!" Zephyr said in her sleep sounding like she was going to cry. Astrid sat on the side of her daughters bed and touched her shoulder. Zephyr jolted awake at the touch and was breathing heavily and saw Astrid. Zephyr looked around her room and realized she had been dreaming. Zephyr looked at Astrid and hugged her and Astrid held her and let her daughter cry. 

"It's okay sweetie. I know you miss him. Do you dream of him often?" Astrid asked her daughter. Zephyr nodded against her, sniffing. 

"I keep thinking I see him, or he's here. The dreams seem so real." Zephyr told her mother. Astrid sighed. 

"I know honey. I have them too." She told her. Zephyr pulled away and looked at her mother. 

"You do?" She asked. Astrid nodded. 

"Yeah, I dream of him every night, some are good and some are like yours, I don't want him to leave. But he's never actually gone. You know that right?" Astrid asked her. 

"What do you mean?" Zephyr looked around her room and her bed and grabbed her Night Fury dragon and held it. "He's dead, of course he's gone." 

"Physically, yes. But your dad is always here. He's probably watching us right now, and I don't think he would want to see you so sad. It's okay to miss him, I miss him all the time. Even I still have days where I cry because I miss him. But I try to remember he's still with me. He's still with you and Nuffink, and he's even with Mattis." Astrid wiped the tears off her daughter's cheek. 

"So he can hear me when I talk to him?" Zephyr asked. 

"I think so. It's okay to talk to him. I talk to him too. Sometimes, when you least expect it, you'll feel him. You'll know it's him sweetie. Did I tell you when I had your brother a few days ago, that daddy visited me?" Zephyr looked at her mom wide-eyed. 

"No? How? You would've had too..." Zephyr didn't finish her sentence. Astrid smiled a little. 

"Sometimes, when you're on the verge of life and death, like I was, because I lost a lot of blood. You can see people who are gone and they can see you, and you can talk to them. But your dad told me I had to go back and I knew that, because I have three of you to take care of and to make sure that you know that he loves you so much." Astrid looked at her daughter in the same blue eyes that mirrored her own. 

"He believed in you Zeph. He knows you'll grow up to be a great leader like he was, because that's what he wanted. If you have any bit of your father in you, you'll be one of the best leaders Berk will have. Because I see him in you every day. In your inventions, in your stories, in the way to try to help and think of others. You have so much of your father in you and that will be your greatest strength one day." Astrid explained to her. Zephyr wrapped her arms around Astrid's neck, hugging her. 

"Thank you mom. I love you." Zephyr said to her. Astrid hugged her back. 

"I love you too, bug. I know I've been distant lately and I'm sorry, I'll try to do better." Zephyr pulled back and smiled at her a little. 

"It's okay mom, I forgive you. Maybe we can pick a time during the week and you can spend it with just us or just one of us." 

"That sounds like a great idea." Astrid smiled and kissed Zephyr's head. "Goodnight sweetheart."

"Goodnight mom." Zephyr laid back down and Astrid put the blanket on her and left her room closing the door. Astrid stood there for a moment and heard Zephyr. "Goodnight dad. I love you." Astrid smiled and checked on Nuffink in his room who was sound asleep and then went to her bedroom and changed into her nightgown and just like clockwork, Mattis woke up crying to be fed as Astrid was about to get into bed. 

She sighed and smirked a little and walked over to the cradle and picked up her son. 

"Can't even let me get a few minutes in first? hey, bud?" Astrid said to Mattis and kissed his cheek. She settled in the rocking chair to feed him and hummed as she did so. She put him back in his cradle and got into bed herself. She laid there and closed her eyes hearing the voice she loved so much. 

"I'm still here." Hiccup's voice echoed in her head.

"I know." She said with a smile before falling asleep. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's all for this one-shot fanfic. This is the probably the longest one-shot I've ever written it's over 11,000 words, and I'm actually really proud of it. I hope you all enjoyed it. 

I'm sorry if I mad any of you cry - I made myself emotional writing it a few times as well.

I had this idea months ago about if Hiccup passed away and Astrid found out she was pregnant afterwards, so I had started writing it, and it just kept going and involving and I definitely think it's one of my best one-shots. 

Anyway, I hope to update again soon! I have lots of ideas on the go for one-shots and some are of Zephyr when she's all grown up and her friends and also Modern AU. So look out for updates! 

Have a good day/night. 

~ httydobsessed13