Flashback / "I love your dimple"

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Her memories made she came back the moment while she was in Côte d'Azur. From her childhood, she has never known the father's love. She asked a hundred times to mommy : "Why I don't have papa like another child ?". Her mother never answered, never told her about him. When she was 12, she has seen once her mom looking to a photo of a man and silently cried so much. From that moment, she never asked again and accepted the fact that she would never see him in her life.

"My mother is Japanese. She moved to France alone when she was pregnant at only 20. I was her only relative, friend and hope. That is why she decided to name me "Amie", which means "friend" in France. That name was not common and my friends made fun of it a lot when I was at school, so I did not like it when I was young. Later, I found out that I am half Japanese, half Korean but born and raised in France. My mother teached me a lot about Japanese manners but never mentioned about Korea. She was even against it. 2 years ago, when I turned 18, she confessed that she had a rare desease and it turned out that it was the last period. She only had one or two years of life left... She hide from me for over a year. At my 18th birthday, she told me about my father. About how he abandon us to chase his own career and accepted to marry a girl from a high class family. It was an arranged marriage that he was against for years because he was with my mom. They even planned to move to France together to avoid the pressure from the families. At the end, he changed his mind and chose his career over my mom. My mom was already pregnant but not telling him even a word. She moved to France and stayed alone all these years to raise me up...", she could not stop herself from crying when she thought about that. The moment when she realized how much her mom sacrified for her, she just did not have enough time to pay back.

"She was afraid that the new husband would treat me badly", she continued, "After telling me all these things, she allowed me to learn Korean and Korean culture. She knew that I always wanted to do it, even when I did not know anything about my race, and secretly read books about Korean history behind her back. But maybe she prepared for it for a long time. She usually teached me to cook Korean dishes and told me Korean kid stories when I was young, she just did not mentioned that it was from Korea. The first time I discover about it was when we watched a report about Korean gastronomy, and I felt that it was so familiar. That was when I started to be curious about the country. Last week, she cooked for me the last dishes, even in her very bad condition of health. I was very surprised that all the table was Korean foods. Then she told me "You should started eating like this from now on". The most astonish thing is that she spoke to me in perfect Korean. I never knew she spoke the language, and how she remembered it for 20 years not practicing. Then I realised that, she never forget about my father, like she never forget Korea".

Her last memory about her mom threw back.

"When I die, you should come to Korea and look for your father", her mom stably said, as it was a very natural thing to say.

"What did you say, mom ?", she opened her eyes widely.

"Only he can take care of you and help you to get a better life. Also, he is the only relative that you have, after my death".

"Stop talk bad things like this, mommy. And even you left me, I could take care about myself. I don't need a man that betrayed my mother. I don't have any father. That's the thing for my whole life !".

The mother shed a tear after hearing these word.

"That's all the past now. I can forgive him after I die. He did not do anything wrong to you and will be good to you. Believe me. You should listen to me ! I know my current condition. I could not make it any longer than someday, and even tonight, who knows. All I can do to you was transfer all the propety and funds into your name. I have already done it. The rent from the appartment we possessed could make your life easier. But you can't stay alone like this. You don't even have a boyfriend or any close friend. I know you are an introvert. That is why you have to find your father. Promise me !".

That night, her mother coughed non-stop for hours with blood. But she refused to call an ambulance.

"That's it. I can't suffer these hurtful treatment. I know my term. Just let it be. The Death are calling me".

"Mom, don't say that ! Don't leave me alone ! How can you leave your Amie alone ! I can't live without you !", she cried out hardly.

"I don't want to. I'm sorry, Amie. I am not a good mom. I make you suffer a lot. I know you do not have a boyfriend and do not want to due to the fact that you had bad impression about men and lacking a father looking after you. You never experienced an affection about any person of the opposite sexe. That was all my bad. But I tried my best to give you every best thing".

"Mom, stay with me, stay with me", her mom spoke a lot but she knew that she was losing her conscience gradually.

"Now, listen to me carefully. The lawyers will meet you tomorrow and make you sign every necessary papers. They will also take care of the funeral. After the procedure, they will give you the flight ticket. You have to come to Korea and look for your father. A private detective that I hired in Korea will contact you and inform you about what he found out after searching. Your father must be an important person now. You can rely on him. You have to promise me... Promise me that you'll find him. Please, this is... my last word", she murmured with all her last strength.

"I promise. Mom, I promise...".

Her mother finally smiled after hearing this. They gave each other their pinkies crossed. Then, the old hand lost all its strength and fallen down.

"I found a letter that my mom wrote to me with the flight ticket. She let me know that their last place was in this village, and they met each other last time on Achasan top mountain. The flight was yesterday. When I just arrived, I went directly to find the address that my mom mentioned. But all I saw was a huge parc. There was anybody lived at this place. Everything must change a lot during these 20 years. I felt very lost and scared. Then, I remembered that she told me their last meet was at the top of Achasan mountain, so I stated to climb up there even at late afternoon. Then, I had that accident and you saved my life from that abyss".

What a long story ! JK did not even imagine that the girl standing in front of him has experienced such things at her young age.

"You must be terrifying when you lost all your stuffs after that accident. You came here alone and did not know anyone. Then lost eveything and had not have even a pence in your pocket. I understand now when you cried that hard when we were on the mountain".

"When you left and started to go down, I took a long time to think about all the past and what I have to do at that moment. I was even super scared while I tried to stand up but failed. It must be because that my mind stopped working and my brain couldn't give order to my leg anymore".

"I know. But good thing is, I'm here for you now. God must send me there to help you. Did you notice that we were the only ones going on that moutain top at that time ? But, still, there is something that I could not stop wondering...", JK said.

"What ?".

"Why did you not ask for my help ? Even in that very bad situation ?".

"Uhm... maybe... because I do not want to use you".

"Use me ?".

"Yes, kind of. I had a very good impression about you. I do not want to ask for your help because at that situation, it was like I force you to help. I mean, you would do it because of politess, and I rather appreciate it. I thought it would have a solution, certainly".

"You must want me to have good impression about you too. And begging for help could break your image, right ? Does it be considered as... love at first sight ?", he teased.

"Psttt, non-sense. You are the one who fall in love with me at first sight !", she argued.

"Well, I do not deny it. I think it's the truth", he smiled so sweet.

"Huh ?".

"I want to be frank to you. And I hope you would do the same. We must fall in love to each other from the very first moment. I admit that my heart beat very fast when I first saw you", he sincerly confessed.

"I like your idea. I want to be frank and sincere too. I admit that I liked you soon after we met, but I tried to keep a distance with you though...".

"Why ?".

"I'm scared".

"Scared ? Do I look scary ? I think I'm cute, and maybe sexy, but not scary !", his comment made them both laughed.

"I admit that you're very attractive. But that makes me scared the most. You seem to be a man who has lots of women around you and then you would turn out to be a bad guy, even you firstly act very sweet".

"What ? What makes you think like that ?".

"I don't know... It was just what I feel about you. I mean, that's the vibes given about your apparence".

"You should judge people a lot about their apparence ! I should tell you one thing, about me and my true self : I do not have any girlfriend until now. I started working at young age and did not have time for relationships during these 7 years. And I may let you down sometimes due to my very few experience about love, but when I start something, I'm very serious, especially about relationship !".

She firstly was embarassed when he told her that she judged people a lot about their apparence, but soon felt unbelievable about what he said after that.

"What ? You never had a girlfriend before ? But you act like you are very experienced. I mean, you're sweet and understanding, and never ask for things that women don't want to talk about...".

"Really ? I thought I should be very bad in relationship. But maybe I seem cold because of my long hair... Should I cut it ?".

"No, don't ! I like it a lot".

"Really ?".

"Yes", her cheeks blushed, "When I was on your back lately, seeing your long hair flying in the wind, it was very beautiful !".

"What else about me that you like, about my apparence ?", he seems to be satisfied hearing what she's just said.

"Uhm... your... dimple".

"My dimples ?".

"Yeah, the one on your left cheek. You only have it when you bite your lips. And you usually do it while focusing on something. That's very cute !".

"I don't like being cute. I want to be manly and cool".

"You are already. But you're cute sometimes too. Anyway, You can be whatever you want. I like it all !", she had a big smile.

"Does it be counted as a love confession ?", he teased her.

"But you confessed first !".

...

The night passed rapidly after they revealed all secret, misunderstanding and express true thoughts about each other. They fell at sleep side by side on the floor because of tiredness from arguing.

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