" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

*I AM NONE OTHER THAN THE DEMON KING. THE TIME HAS COME FOR DEMONS TO RULE THE WORLD !*

Demon: WE ARE FALLING BEHIND IN CULTIVATING OUR NEW MAGICAL ADVANCEMENTS ! USEFUL MAGIC TECHNOLOGIES THAT SHOULD'VE LONG BEEN DEVELOPED AND APPLIED ARE STILL STUCK IN RESEARCH PHASE ! HENCE ! WE MUST PUT AN END TO THE CURRENT DISREGARD FOR THE MAGICAL ARTS ! CAST YOUR BLOODSTAINED VOTES FOR THE DEMON KING, DEATHABYSS !!

Stunk: So loud. But she's cute, so I'll let it pass.

"You really think with your crotch."

Stunk: And you don't ?

"We prefer to keep it professional. Plus I wouldn't like people to have a bad opinion of Sei."

Zel: It's already election season... ? They should just hold these once a century or so...

"For the last time, a century is the average lifetime for most races..."

*Regarding announcements from Demon Kings: In this world, where different kinds of species coexist, no one really feels any resistance to being ruled by a demon king. Proclamations or World Domination are just plain old political speeches ! There were many times when demon kings were in power a few millennia ago, but they haven't won a single election in years ! ... Maybe it's because other species are having trouble with all the recent changes in infrastructure for underworld residents... ?*

Crimvael: What party is in power right now ?

"The orc party."

Zel: Well... yeah, I guess that's how it'd balance out...

Stunk: Moreover, food gets super cheap ! Taxes are about as low as they get ! And they even include succubus districts in their budget !

*The orc party platform: "Food self-sufficiency first ! It's okay if taxes are low ! Stability over expansion ! Slumber over labor ! Let's eat, sleep, and have fun ! That's how all living creatures can be happy." Don Tehki, the current king.*

Zel: Their platform is totally what the masses want, after all...

Stunk: The orcs are gonna win no matter what you do. that's why I vote for the succubus party. I'd like them to have a few seats in parliament.

*Succubus party: Sex first, sex second, and strong government support for sex !!*

"The fact that we count for 2 votes is annoying... Hmm... She is pretty cute, though... hey, I don't think we've ever been to a demon girl joint before, have we ?"

Stunk: I... Don't think so ? We certainly haven't reviewed any, that's for sure. Wanna go ?

Zel: Um... Demons... Dunno about demons...

Crim: I don't think I'd like that either...

Stunk: What, you guys don't like demon girls ?

???: THAT'S RIGHT ! DEMONS ARE VERY UNPOPILAR !!

Two: I'm sorry. I am Demon Two, Public Relations director of the demon party. I work for mistress Deathabyss, the one giving her speech there.

"Um... okay... ?"

Two: Back to my point !! We pure demons always end up in the top five most unmarriageable species ! This is a very grave situation !!

*We asked 100 species ! Top species you don't want to marry.

5th: Reptilians. Smell like fish. Incompatible bodies. They don't move all day.

4th: Snow women/Yuki-Onna. Cold. Bad personality. Seriously bad personality.

3rd: Fire spirits. Hot. Can't hold them. Can burn your house down.

2nd: Demons. Selfish. They seem abusive. Scary aura.

1st: Undead. Can't. They stink. Not feeling the bones either.*

"Well, this can't be helped... they've been quite a lot of rumors and stories about that... You should work on your communication."

Two: That's what I'm getting at ! Your reviews... I've seen them. The species you review... have gone from being completely ignored in the rankings, to reaching new heights in fame !!

Stunk: Oh ? So what you're saying is, in order to boost your image...

"... You want to request us..."

Zel: ... To review some demon girls ?

Stunk: Heh-heh... But you do know we don't hold back in our reviews, right ?

"With us, no amount of money can buy you a good note, you've got to earn it. Sooo..."

Stunk: You'd better give us the most beautiful, sexiest demon girls you've got ! C'mon, out with 'em ! It better be your treat !

Two: ... As much as I would love to, providing paid services to voters during an election... Would be a violation of the public officers election act... You'll have to do it on your own...

"That's... Surprisingly upright. Not what you'd expect from demons..."

Stunk: Ugh, you're useless, you Piccolo wannabe.

Two: Well, the very most I could do, is introduce you to an excellent shop. Now, if you'll excuse me ! The demon party rests in your hands !!

"... ... ... So ? What are we gonna do with that now ?"

Zel: I don't like demon joints. A lot of them are ripoffs or scams... But there's no way we're gonna get ripped off after an invite like this. I'd be fine with demons in this case

Stunk: Okay, so blue-skinned demon girls it is ! Time for some demon fusion !

Crim: I'm going to sit this one out... For money reasons too...

Stunk: Don't knock it 'till you've tried it.

"He's an angel. It'd be like throwing a Yuki-Onna and a salamander together. It'd be funny to watch, but very painful for both of them."

Stunk: We're here.

Samtahn: You sure this guy wasn't a scammer, claiming to be a PR guy ? I don't trust my kind...

"What do you think ? Of course I double-checked, and he really is the official PR guy for the demon party."

Zel: There's nothing to worry about on that front, but we don't know if the store's any good or not yet. I'm gonna dump on them if it's a stinker.

"Um, guys... Weren't we supposed to... Oh, for fuck's sake... Take over, i'm tired of this shit."

*Fwish*

"H- heh... ?"

*A hands-on milking experience at the farm !

Stunk/Human: The moment I saw some of these girls going to work, I was sucked in by their incredible bosoms. From enjoying their dynamite bodies to drink as much milk as you want straight from the source, this beautiful store will quench all kinds of erotic thirsts. As far as the actual taste go, it's just plain, lukewarm milk. One unfortunate minus is how hard and muscular their breasts and bodies are despite their looks. If you're expected to get milked between those things, you're gonna be disappointed. 7.

Zel/Elf: BOOBIES ! It's so straightforward ! Amazing boobs. You won't be able to enjoy the milk play unless you pick a married girl with kids, so be sure to check at reception if that's something you want. As far as character, most of them are gentle, passive girls who let you do whatever you want, so I can't recommend this place to receivers out there. But it's perfect for givers who want to turn the tables and stroke a girl until her milk comes bursting out ! 8.

Brooz/Beastman: This place just has dairy girls, not any of these totally ripped minotaurs you often see. Also, there are some amazing breasts here. But while they're dairy girls, they're still minotaurs, so they've got really muscular bodies, just right for someone like myself who doesn't really like a body that's too soft. While all of that's great, the fact that they make pure milk is no good. As someone who's part dog, it'd be bad news for my stomach if I drank any.

... the fact that it smells and tastes good only annoys me more. 6.

Sei/Human: If we forget that one time I was almost knocked out when she turned around... At least I learned something useful, it's that they have really strong maternal instincts, so even if you're on the "receiving" end of the deal, you can thoroughly enjoy being pampered by them. Bonus point if you're into roleplay. 7.

Samtahn/Demon: Dairy cows are rare in the underworld, so this is some new territory for me here. The are the complete opposite ot the hostile, tenacious minotaurs who are all over the underworld. They're all extremely passive and let you do whatever you want, so this place might be even more fun if you're a whipped guy in a relationship with a minotaur.

... of course, it might get you killed if she found out you were playing around with huge-breasted dairy cows, so do it at your own risk. 8.*

Crim: Hm ? What about the demon review ?

Zel: Say this apple was bigger than the Earth. Then the earth would fall toward this apple.

Stunk: Breasts just have their own gravity men can't fight.

"You guys really think with your crotch. All three of you."

Stunk: ... Speaking of forces of attraction, I'm quite certain you're not indifferent to the "Gravity" of a certain birdmaid working here, hmm ?

"PFFFFFFFR- WHO TOLD Y- I- I mean, I have no idea what you're talking about !"

Zel: Deny it all you want, but i'm pretty sure everyone here already noticed at least something. Meidri included.

*Fwish*

"I keep telling him that. But he just won't listen..."

Meidri: Listen to what ?

Stunk: Perfect timing.

"I think Sei wanted to tell you something."

*Fwish*

Meidri: Oh ? What is it ?

"... ... ... ..."

*Plom*

Stunk: Drat. Foiled again.

"So you guys really went to that 'Genderswap inn' ?"

Zel: To be honest, I'm more surprised that you declined.

"Oh, I've been already, quite some time ago. Bad experience."

Stunk: really ? What happened ?

"Uhhh..."

"WHY THE HELL AM I SO FLAT ?!"

"... Call that bad physical compatibility..."

Zel: Funnily enough... Or as funny as it can get, something happened for us too...

"Is that why you've been ogling Crim for the past half an hour ?"

Stunk: I... I think it'd be better if you read the reviews.

*Swordswoman/Fem-Stunk: This time, we got to play as women at the genderswap inn ! I went with an elf, always a safe pick. As for my thoughts on what we did together, if I'm being honest with you, it hurts a good deal... It felt like the very first time I peeled back my skin and played with myself as a kid... Anyway, she knew I was so sensitive and that it hurt, so she was pretty gentle with me, but it seems like it's something you need to do multiple times before you get used to it... I never got close to feeling like I wanted anything inside me, at least... At the end of the day, I guess I'm a guy. But learning how a woman feels did teach me about how to please them, so I'd say it's worth experiencing at least once. By the way, we review stores in this column, so the score is for the genderswap play, not the girl ! 5.*

"... How old ?"

Zel: Around 650.

"Ew."

Stunk: That's not the point ! Keep reading !

*Girl Halfling thief/Chalmy: Genderswap play, huh... I don't know if it's because of a difference in pain threshold or a matter of experience, but... It kind of hurts. I heard, once you're into it, you get so into it you can't go back to being a guy... I'd rather not have that happen to me. I picked someone from the same specie. I thought I had made a good choice because she seemed good at knowing just how hard to go, but she was actually a little too good at it. I told her it hurt, but she'd just laugh and keep messing around inside of me... Gimme a break... I don't want to have to be with a trickster... Wait, I'm reviewing the girl now. Well, I guess you guys will get to experience something new when you start making weird sounds you've never made before. 4.*

"Yikes. By the sound of it, It's a good thing we didn't really try..."

Stunk: Call that "Bad physical compatibility", I guess...

Zel: The interesting part's about to start.

*Booby elf/Zelzel: The genderswap potion made by the grand mage Demia (Who is considered the best mage in the world) are perfect. I was able to become a girl from head to toe, and it all felt natural. That part on its own is incredible and gets high marks. I decided to spend time with a slimegirl. They're able to provide gentle stimulation that barely hurts if you're sensitive, and my whole body felt more sensual than it was when I was a guy, so the feeling of her enveloping every inch of me and moving around felt great. As a guy, the feeling of her inside of me was pretty foreign. I made all sorts of moan I'd never make in a male body. It feels different to the point of being a bit creepy... But it is worth experiencing from a pure knowledge standpoint. 8*

"And best for last... What should I expect ?"

Stunk: You can't... You just can't expect that...

"... *Gulp*"

*Fem-angel who didn't change much/Clitorim: The potion turned me entirely into a woman, so I went along and picked a cool hyenagirl, who was close to being male both in body and heart. While the way she talked and acted was a little scary, I actually started to feel a sense of security as she treated me gently, and my mind felt even more fulfilled than my body. By the time we were done, I may have felt far more satisfied there than I had at any regular store. I did feel a little nervous at first because it was my first time doing anything like this entirely as a woman, but I guess it's nice to be able to focus on my female side now and then. 9.*

"... ... Okay, the f*ck ?"

'Aww, that's so sweet.'

"It ain't sweet, that's just plain weird !"

Stunk: He totally knew what he was doing when he picked her... !!

Zel: So he really doesn't have a problem doing it with guys... ? Huh ?!

Crim: Hm ? What is up ?

All: ... ... ... ... ...