{re-uploaded and edited from - [02] kshaw • camping}

|| ship; kshaw (harry x jj)

|| warnings; non-explicit smut

|| words; 4.7k

- {} -

JJ never thought he'd see the day where he was grateful for Josh dragging them all out into the 'wilderness' for a month long camping trip.

In fact, if someone had come from the future, and told him that he'd not only tolerated it, but it'd sparked plenty more camping trips that he had voluntarily went on, he woud have told them that they were out of their mind.

All of the boys were reluctant about going, to say the least. Nobody liked the idea of spending four weeks in the middle of nowhere; without luxuries, and the comfort of every day life. But Josh had already arranged everything, so that they couldn't back out, and couldn't make excuses not to go.

So, after a nearly five hour car journey, they arrived.
As much as JJ would have hated to admit it - the campsite was amazing. Secluded, and surrounded by thick woodland, which only took a five minute walk through to get to the beautiful, clear lake. A feature of the that JJ would remember very fondly indeed.

And finally, the centre of the site itself. A lush, flat green field where they would pitch their tents. Cropped grass, and the promise that no other campers would bother them during their stay.

Josh then declared that they'd be split randomly into teams. A moment that, again, defined the rest of the trip for JJ.

Because he got paired up with Harry.

-

"For fucks sake, JJ!" Harry laughs, somewhat breathlessly, as he struggles to hold up the smallish, two-man tent by himself. Since JJ has fallen over. Again.

"S'not my fault, man," huffs JJ, getting slowly to his feet, and grabbing onto his designated poles again. "It's fuckin' muddy."

"JJ, it's the middle of July," Harry says, cocking his head to the side, and barely hiding the smile that tugs at the corners of his mouth. "There is no mud."

"We're in a field, Harry, of course there's mud," JJ argues playfully.

"God, I knew putting you two together was a bad idea," calls Josh, from where he's sat in a camping chair, besides Ethan, and their already made tent. "There's about negative four brain cells between you."

"Could'a been worse. Could'a had JJ and Ethan together," Harry calls back, to which Josh laughs.

"Oi, shut up and build your bloody tent, Bog!" Shouts Ethan, folding his arms tightly over his chest, and seeming rather offended by the comment. JJ can't help but grin at this. Ethan's irritation has always been amusing to him.

"Jay, stop laughing, we need to get this done," Harry says, barely hiding a grin himself.

JJ can't help but think Harry looks quite beautiful like this. A very strange thought, especially as Harry is looking far from his best. Red faced from laughing, and the effort it's taken to put up this damn tent. Sweaty, the effect of putting effort into something physical in the late July heat, with his damp fringe plastered to his forehead. He probably smells God-awful too.

But JJ doesn't care. It's his smile that makes him look beautiful. A genuine one, not the faked ones often seen on camera. A smile you can see in his eyes.

Something rare. It makes JJ himself want to smile even more, just from seeing it.

"'Course mate," JJ responds, almost automatically to Harry's statement. Because he's caught up trying to do something else.

Trying to get those thoughts about his best mate out of his head for good.

-

They've been there for just over three weeks now, and it's really not as bad as JJ originally thought it might be.

The first week was really difficult; of course it was. Trying to get into it. Trying to enjoy never getting enough sleep, because of how cold the nights were, and how the uneven ground hurt JJ's back. Trying not to be bothered by the way that cold and damp seemed to seep into his bones in the mornings.

But now he's got used to it, everything seems a lot easier. Enjoyable almost. He can understand the appeal of doing it just for fun.

The holiday hasn't just been good for the scenery, and the new experiences though.

While they've been away, JJ has sensed his bond with Harry strengthening significantly. He's not entirely sure if it's because they're in such close proximity every night, or whatever, but Harry's barely left his side the whole trip. They've been doing everything together.

And because of this, JJ's gained a new-found appreciation for the youngest Sidemen.

Spending so much time around him was bound to do that.

But he just thinks Harry is fucking great.

Certainly helps that he's gorgeous too. Handsome. Sexy. Beautiful. Any positive adjective, JJ could use, and it would still somehow be applicable to Harry's looks.

JJ just thinks that he looks so effortlessly hot. Whatever he is doing, or wearing. And he doesn't understand why.

He's never had this fascination with Harry before. Or any men, for that matter. So it feels a little strange at first, to be thinking these things. But then, after a short amount of deliberation, he decides that he doesn't care. As long as he gets to admire Harry.

He doesn't care that he's supposed to be big, bold, masculine, straight-man, KSI. Because for this trip, and this trip only, he's gonna let himself fancy his mate.

Simon noticed JJ's very obvious infatuation - of course he did, it's Simon after all. He can read JJ like a book. A very simple book, written for children.
To be fair though, JJ didn't exactly make an effort to hide it.

Openly staring at Harry, any opportunity he'd get. Any time he thought Harry looked particularly good.

Be it when Harry had fallen into the lake, only to come out with his soaking wet white t-shirt clinging to him, dripping from head to toe. Or when they'd played basketball that one time, using a couple of trees as makeshift hoops, and whenever Harry would jump up to get the ball, his hoodie would ride up to show of a tiny band of skin, which JJ would drool over for hours afterwards.

Even in more innocent moments, like when he'd pull a camping chair right up in front of the fire, and cuddle up with a huge hoodie, and a pile of fleece blankets - roasting marshmallows until he ran out, or Josh finally confiscated the bag from him.

No wonder Simon noticed, after all that.

The pair talked it out, for nearly two hours one night, after all the others had gone to bed. And after a while, Simon put it down to the fact that JJ hadn't been able to... take care of things on the camping trip. And that JJ was just obsessed with Harry because of all his pent up sexual frustration.

JJ played along, and agreed with him. Managed to convince Simon it was nothing more than that.

Couldn't convince himself though.

Knew it was down to something more than him just being horny. And then, as he thought about it, realised that this feeling had been around for so much longer than just the camping trip.

He'd always had a soft spot for Harry. A particular fondness, that was different to how he felt about the other guys.

But he'd just been so damn good at hiding it, even from himself, that he hadn't realised what it really was.

Now that they were in a place with no stress, or distractions, his feelings had come to light.

Once he realised this, he started to notice more things about Harry, than just the somewhat extraordinarily cute things, or how nice his ass looked.

Just, normal things.

How beautiful he is when he smiles. How nice he sounds when he laughs at JJ's shitty jokes. How peaceful he looks when he's asleep. How nice Harry smells, and how calming, soothing almost, JJ finds it. How much JJ loves Harry's stupid, Guernsey accent.

Just everything really.

And it's driving him fucking crazy knowing it.

-

"Hey, JJ. JJ!"

"Fuck off, Bog. S'not morning yet," JJ mumbles, trying to ignore the ridiculously loud sound of Harry's sleeping bag rustling as he moves. And then the feeling of Harry poking his cheek.

"I've got something cool," Harry says, far too enthusiastically for at whatever un-Godly hour it is.

"What?" JJ responds sleepily, hoping Harry will just tell him, and then go back to sleep.

"You need to open your eyes, Jide," Harry states, in a very matter of fact way, which doesn't improve JJ's mood.

"Fine," JJ huffs, hoping complying will mean he gets back to sleep quicker.

But when he opens his eyes, his intrigue is piqued.
For he finds a very pleased looking Harry, holding the box of what seems to be a brand new air mattress. He props himself up on his elbows, and squints at Harry in the low light.

"An air mattress? Where the fuck did you get that?" JJ asks, trying desperately to hide the curiosity, and air of impress in his tone. And failing.

Harry looks even more chuffed with himself now, puffing out his chest slightly, the silhouette of a smug grin playing on his lips.

"Yesterday morning. I nicked Kon's car keys the night before, and took his car out at like, two am. Then decided, why not buy something?" Harry explains. JJ can't help but feel even more impressed.

"You're fucking crazy Harry," he says fondly, reaching out to ruffle the younger's hair. "What do you even plan on doing with it? If Josh finds it in our tent, you're gonna get bollocked."

Harry scoffs at this. "I'm not going to sleep on it. I was gonna blow it up, and use it as a raft. Go and float it out on the lake, something like that."

"What part of your brain told you that that's a good idea? Was it the inbred, Guernsey side?" JJ asks, making sure to laugh, letting Harry know he's only joking.

"Might of been that side, yeah," Harry chuckes. "Care to join me?"

"I'd be crazy too if I didn't."

-

There's only two days left now, before they have to go home. So naturally, the boys had all decided to stay up drinking. Late.

It's nearly three in the morning, and JJ and Harry are the only ones left. The others went to bed hours ago, having had too much to drink too quickly.

JJ's mostly sober now, having spent the last couple of hours just on water, and fresh air, but Harry's far from it. Not completely off the rails, but not exactly near sober either. Relaxed enough to be much more compliant than usual. There's no way he'd be able to keep secrets in this state. And JJ's almost certain that anything said to him, won't be retained to remember in the morning.

JJ's been spending time, thinking.

Going over memories from the trip in detail. Memories of things he's done with Harry. Time he's spent, just the two of them.

That night on the lake was one of them.

He thinks he'll remember that forever.

It was truly beautiful. Seeing Harry, pale skin bathed in moonlight, as they lay together on their 'raft'. Just talking. About the little things. The meaningful ones.

He's sure he got to know Harry better that one night than the entire time they'd known each other. He got to know the real Harry, not the fake personality he puts on to impress people, and come across as 'normal'.

The Harry who will talk your ear off about random facts he's learnt from hours of scrolling the internet, or weird TV shows he's watched. The Harry who shares stories from his childhood, and general experiences, without fear of being judged. The Harry who laughs openly at JJ's jokes, without feeling the need to hide his beautiful smile.

They stayed out on the lake, until the sun came up. Watched it fill the skies with it's gorgeous hues, soft yellows, oranges and pinks. Light, fluffy looking clouds drifting across the sky, without a care in the world.

Went back to their tent at six, both soaking wet and cold, carrying their clothes because neither had thought to bring towels.

Met with questioning looks from Josh, the only other person crazy enough to be up at that time.

Neither of them cared though.

They were happy.

Just thinking about these times they'd spent brings nostalgia to JJ. Even if they all happened within the last month. It feels like they've been out there forever.

He wants Harry to know how much he's going to treasure these memories.

And just how deeply he feels.

This could be his best, and last chance.

Not that Harry will remember it in his current state. But somehow, knowing that, makes JJ feel safe to tell him.

So, he does.

-

"Hey, Harry?" JJ says, breaking the comfortable silence that had formed, and looking across the dying embers of the fire at the other boy. Harry glances up, with dilated pupils. Probably due to both intoxication, and the low light.

"Sup Jide?" Harry asks, taking another swig from his beer, and then leaning forwards with his elbows on his knees to get a better look at JJ.

"Can I tell you something?" JJ asks, and Harry tilts his head to the side in a questioning manner.

"Yeah, sure," he responds, crumpling the now empty can in his hand. Instead of putting it in the bin bag, he fidgets with it in his hands.

"I think you're really hot," JJ blurts out, and Harry laughs heartily at him.

"Duh, of course I am," he says, faking a cocky tone.

"No, I mean it," JJ says seriously, and Harry furrows his eyebrows slightly. Seems confused by the sincerity.

"Really?" He says, seeming genuinely surprised.

"Yeah," JJ responds. "I think I might like you. Wait. Fuck that. I definitely like you."

"JJ, are you messing with me?" Harry says, looking troubled. Uncertain. JJ knows he can't tell if he's telling the truth or not. That he has to clarify.

"No Harry, I'm not messing," JJ sighs.

"Alright. Love you too then, Jide," Harry says, slurring his words slightly, with a ridiculous grin plastered on his face. He tries to stand up, but sways, nearly toppling straight into the fire. JJ quickly rushes to his feet in order to help Harry, wrapping an arm firmly around his shoulders to prop him up. Harry's arm slides around JJ's waist, his hand resting on his hip.

"C'mon, it's getting late," JJ says sternly, guiding Harry carefully towards their tent.

"You smell nice," Harry murmurs, sounding half out of it, and not looking up since he's too focused on where he's putting his feet.

"Thanks, I guess?" JJ laughs, not really knowing how to respond to this odd comment. Harry's grip on his waist tightens, and he pulls himself further into JJ's side. Eventually, with a lot of effort, the older boy manages to get Harry comfortably into their tent, and then into his sleeping bag. Just as JJ's zipping his own sleeping bag up, Harry looks over at him again.

"I meant it JJ. I know I'm drunk, but I meant what I said," Harry says, staring at JJ intensely.

"Me too. Now go to sleep."

-

When JJ wakes the next morning, he finds that Harry must of crawled into his sleeping bag during the night. He's tucked himself neatly into JJ's side, his head resting on his bare chest, soft hair tickling the skin there lightly. He looks so peaceful like this, not a worry on his usually anxious and overactive mind. He breathes deeply, and JJ is content just watching the slow rise and fall of Harry's smaller body.

They lay like that for what feels like hours, JJ watching Harry sleep. Taking in his features, as if it'd be the last time he'd get to look at Harry's gorgeous face.

Looking over eyebrows, that always somehow stay the perfect shape no matter how many times Harry rubs his hands over his face. Straight nose, with a strangely high bridge, that makes JJ wonder if Harry's ever broken it. Barely there freckles, that you can only see when you're this close to him. Bigger than average lips, that somehow suit his face, and look ridiculously inviting.

JJ wishes he could know what they taste like. 

The tent gradually gets lighter as the sun comes up, and as it does, JJ feels Harry's breathing becoming more shallow, and he twitches more frequently, as if he's shifting into a lighter sleep. Eventually, his whole body stiffens in JJ's arms, and he lets out a loud, over-exaggerated yawn.

"Good morning," JJ grins, as Harry rests his chin on JJ's chest, looking up at him with hazy eyes, and a slightly confused expression.

"JJ? Why're you in my sleeping bag?" He asks, his voice slightly scratchy with sleep.

"You're in mine, dumbass," JJ responds, and Harry groans softly.

"I'm sorry, I'll get out," he mutters. "Just give me five more minutes..." His eyes begin to drift closed again, and JJ pats his arm in an effort to keep him awake.

"Oh no, you're not going back to sleep. I want to talk to you," he says, continuing to pat Harry's arm until the younger boy opens his eyes again reluctantly.

"Alright, I'm listening. What's up JJ?" He sighs, seeming uhappy. JJ's almost certain that Harry already knows what's about to come from this conversation.

"I want to talk about what we both said last night," JJ says, keeping his tone serious, and watches as Harry now busily tries to avoid meeting his gaze. He can feel Harry's fingers writhing anxiously against his stomach, and the younger's very obvious nervousness makes JJ remember his.

"We were drunk. It doesn't matter," Harry says dismissively. But JJ can hear slight disappointment laced into his tone.

"I wasn't drunk," JJ admits, and Harry looks up at him sharply.

"You weren't?" Harry asks. JJ thinks he could melt from the innocent, hopeful way Harry looks up at him, with those beautiful clear eyes of his. JJ's weakness.

"I wasn't. And I meant everything I said," JJ confesses. He considers brushing some stray hair from Harry's forehead, but resists the temptation. "I thought it was just because of how you looked at first, but I do like you Harry. A lot, in fact."

"I like you too JJ," Harry says shyly, avoiding the older man's gaze, as delicate pink dusts his pale cheeks.

"Good. Now that's cleared up, I've been wanting to kiss you, for like, since we got here. May I?" JJ asks, tone uncharcteristically soft. Letting the protectiveness and care he feels towards Harry flood his words. Harry seems pleasantly surprised by how respectful JJ is being, since the he's usually just the type to take what he wants, when he wants.

Harry doesn't look like he's about to complain about it though.

Instead of replying, Harry pushes himself up onto his elbows, and leans down to meet JJ's lips in a soft kiss. JJ can feel him smiling, and honestly, that's the best thing about it. He carefully trails a  hand to rest on the back of Harry's neck, in order to keep him close. His other hand slips around the younger's slender waist to rest on the small of his back, enjoying the feeling of closeness it provides from their bodies being pressed together.

The kiss doesn't stay innocent for long, both of them overcome with the want, and the tension that's been building between them during the last month. Harry's hands move to weave tightly into JJ's dreads, seeming to be looking for some kind of purchase. JJ allows his hands to roam over Harry's body, slipping under his T-shirt to enjoy the feeling of warmth that his smooth skin privides. The feeling of his lips and hands on him doesn't comapre to anyhting else he's ever felt in all his years. It's heavenly.

After a while, JJ flips them over, so that Harry's now on his back beneath him. Harry's hands ghost shyly up and down JJ's sides, as the older takes the opportunity to look into his eyes. And all that's there is want, and trust. Lust is evident in the way Harry bites his lip. Knowing the feeling is mutual boosts JJ's confidence significantly.

He takes control again, a little more roughly this time, pleased when Harry lets it happen, moaning wantonly at the touch. JJ is well aware that Harry can probably feel his boner pressing against the inside of his thigh, and that Harry knows exactly where this is going. But doesn't object at all. In fact, he seems all for it.

And so, they let it happen. It's hot, and messy, but neither of them care really, too caught up in the feeling of the each other. JJ loves more than anything how loud Harry is, begging him for more with every tiny touch or adjustment. He loves how much Harry wants him. He loves knowing that his feelings have been requited all this time.

Afterwards, they lie together, limbs tangled, both coming down from the hell of a high, listening to each other's heavy breathing. JJ is certain that Harry is going to be limping for the rest of the day, but the smaller boy doesn't seem too bothered by it. He keeps his arms tight around JJ, as if he's afraid to let go.

"Are you alright?" JJ asks after a while. Harry smiles up at him sweetly.

"Yeah, I'll be fine," he responds, before biting his lip shyly and looking away from JJ for a moment. "Was I okay?"

"You were brilliant," JJ praises, lifting his hand to run it through Harry's hair. "I've never fucked a guy before - I thought I was straight, so of course I haven't - but I loved it. I'd like for it to happen again sometime?" He adds hopefully.

As soon as this is suggested, Harry grins back at him with a radiance similar to that of the sun. "I'd like that too." He then leans forwards to press a brief kiss to the corner of JJ's mouth.

"What are we now?" JJ asks when he pulls away, a slightly hint of seriousness to his tone. Harry shrugs nonchalantly.

"I don't know yet. But why don't we just enjoy it? We don't need a definite label yet," he says. "I like you, and I know you like me. But I want to be sure about stuff before we start considering a relationship."

JJ nods thoughtfully. "That's fine."

"We can agree that it isn't a no strings situation though?" Harry questions, looking a little worried.

"I'm not going to be looking at anyone else while you're on my mind, don't worry," JJ assures him. Harry breathes out a relieved sigh.

"Good," he replies.

"One more thing," JJ says. "How would you feel about me taking you out? Like, on a date?"

"I'd like that a lot," Harry says softly, allowing a smile to tug at his lips.

"Okay. When we get back home, I'll take you out somewhere," JJ promises, also grinning widely.

Suddenly though, there's a large amount of noise and shuffling outside their tent's entrance that ruins the peace of the moment. Then comes the sound of someone hitting the fabric of the tent door to get their attention. Harry rolls his eyes, and JJ stifles a laugh at the younger's irritated behaviour.

"Come on boys, time to get up!" Calls Josh. Harry groans loudly in complaint, and drags himself even closer to JJ.

"Piss off, Josh," he grumbles.

"We've got to start filming in half an hour, get your lazy arses out of that tent," Josh says sternly, before going away again.

"Come on Haz, you heard him," JJ says. He attempts  to sit up, but can't since Harry has latched himself even more tightly than before to his torso. "We've got to get up."

"I don't want to," Harry says, his voice slightly muffled since he's buried his face in JJ's chest.

"I know babe, but we need to," JJ coaxes, nudging Harry's shoulder gently. The younger looks up at him suddenly, his eyebrows furrowed, in what seems to be curiosity. "What?" JJ asks, confused by Harry's sudden movement.

"You called me babe," Harry states simply.

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking. If it bothers you, I won't do it again," JJ explains, having the curtesy to sound slightly apologetic. Harry shakes his head.

"No, I like it," he admits, a subtle flush rising on his cheeks again. He slowly pushes himself off JJ, and unzips the sleeping bag, shivering when the cold, morning air wafts over his bare skin. "C'mon, let's get up then," he adds reluctantly.

"A'ight," JJ responds, watching closely as Harry climbs out of the sleeping bag. He blushes profusely when he notices JJ staring, trying to cover himself up as best as possible. JJ quickly gets out of the too, standing before Harry, and then gently moving his hands away from his body. Harry smiles nervously as JJ cups his face in his hands, and looks him intensely in the eye.

"You're fucking beautiful Harry. You don't need to hide yourself when you're with me," JJ murmurs, before pressing a soft lingering kiss to Harry's lips.

"Thank you," Harry responds after JJ pulls away. "But I think I might need to get dressed before we go outside," he adds, with a joking edge to his tone.

"Of course," JJ says, with a laugh. "I don't want the others to see you like this. That's a privilege only I get to have." He almost purrs the last bit, and notices Harry shiver at the possessiveness in his words.

The two get dressed in a comfortable silence. Harry has to wear a turtleneck shirt, since JJ may have got a little carried away with marking up his neck. Harry hasn't made a complaint though, so JJ takes that as a win. Just as they're finishing up, JJ notices that Harry hasn't put on a hoodie. Poor idiot would freeze to death if he went out like that. So JJ takes this as an opportunity to get one of his own hoodies, and tug it gently over the smaller's head.

"JJ, this isn't mine," Harry mumbles, as JJ pulls the hoodie onto him, and brushes out any wrinkles in the fabric.

"I know. It looks good on you though," JJ responds smoothly, pressing a quick kiss to Harry's cheek. "What do you think, should we go and eat now?"

"Yeah."

-

"You two are both in a right state, Jesus Christ," comments Simon as Harry and JJ walk up to sit at the wooden table.

"What're you talking about?" Harry asks, trying his best to just play it off. The others exchange a look around them, which worries the pair in question considerably.

"Guys, we heard you," Ethan says, with a grimace, seeming unhappy about having to tell them. Harry's face flushes crimson, and JJ laughs nervously.

"Heard what?" Says JJ. Vikk rolls his eyes frustratedly.

"We heard you fucking," Vikk says exasperatedly. Harry groans loudly at this, seeming embarrassed, and presses his face into JJ's shoulder.

"Harry, bro, you're loud as fuck. And tent walls aren't exactly soundproof," Tobi says. "Nobody needed to hear that."

"What, did you expect me to be quiet about taking JJ's cock up my arse?"'Harry shoots back, without thinking, then blushing when he realises what he said. Tobi sniggers at this.

"Babe, you're really digging us into a hole here," says JJ, before grabbing onto Harry's hips, and pulling him firmly into his lap. Harry sighs, wrapping his arms around JJ's neck, and re-burying his face in his shoulder.

"I know, I'll be quiet," mumbles Harry.

"You bloody well will be next time. Especially if you're at ours," Josh says, glaring sternly at JJ, who raises his hands in surrender.

"What about at my flat?" Harry asks, a hint of his usual mischief returning as the embarrassment subsides.

"Go ahead then. Traumatise Cal," laughs Josh.

"Oh, we will."

- {} -

a.n: yes bois! we back with another re-upload! (haven't proofed it yet tho, oop-)

pretty pleased with this one too, ngl. although there wasn't as much i felt like i needed to change about the last bit

but yeah, ya boi is feeling good

for anyone wondering, everything went smoothly with jamie (my boyfriend) moving out on wednesday. his mum wasn't accepting, but we expected that. and he was pleasantly surprised by how well his dad, sister and grandparents took it.

he's currently living with his auntie, who i met the other day, and is absolutely lovely.

i'm so pleased to see him relaxed, and feeling safe. and to see him have family who still love him unconditionally, because everyone deserves to be loved <3

so yeah, we're both a lot more relaxed now.

i'm gonna spend the next week catching up on my school work, and then hopefully i'll have more time to write :)

thanks for reading lads, and for being so patient with me, it means the world

hope you're all well

and see you in the next chapter :)

~ Oscar