Here's your review: BluandPenguino

Reviewer: accio-snitch

Author: BluandPenguino

Title: My Awakening

⚡⚡⚡Review/Results:

Title: 5/5I don't think I've come across an array of Poems and Quotes as well as Short Stories. I thought it was really good. It really motivated me.

Cover: 3.5 - 4.5/5The cover is really good! Maybe utilise the use of Cover Shops to portray the motivation in this book. And make it more eye-catching! You can check some out in my reading list or by searching on Wattpad!

Blurb: 3.5/5The blurb, is good. But it can also be improved! :) Yes the blurb is a decent amount, but, does it reel in the reader? What I do appreciate is there are no grammatical errors which tend to deterrent people from reading.

Opening: 10/10The openings are good! They are not to complex neither overbearing. You get into the plot immediately which is what I really liked.

Character Development: 9/15Since there aren't that many short stories published so I can't really gauge your character development. But so, far from what I've read it's pretty good! (Sorry if I offended you!)

Grammar: (I'm kind of a stickler for grammar so I may be a bit harsh! I don't mean to offend you!)16/20

Overall, it was pretty good! But what I found was, you using ellipses quite a lot such as:

She would whisper softly as she cradled her child.......

Instead write: she cradled her child,

And "No, no, my little princess.

"Write: "No, no my little princess" you don't need another pause.

And in The Damned Man: 'Her eyes sparkled in the shimmering twilight as I looked into them taking her hands in mine.

'It is good: but if you really want to set the mood, and show off your amazing talent then all you need to do is SHOW not TELL. Make the reader: Feel, Hear, Smell, Sight, Taste and Feel (emotion)

This is one of the ways you can improve:

Her eyes sparkled in the shimmering twilight, as I gazed into them. Taking her hand in mine as I began to speak:

"I promise." I told her squeezing her hands reassuringly.

Plot: 5/10As the plot varies from short story to short story. I don't know how to gauge it properly. But I'll wait for more updates of your short stories so give a more concrete score.

Writing Style: 7/10It's simple yet powerful and effective at the same time, depending on the reader. For me the "Perfect Princess" really stuck out to me out of the three stories and poems.

Enjoyment: 9/10Total; 69/100

I enjoyed it! I don't know if I can say anything else, I sincerely apologize if I in any way hurt your feelings. I didn't intend to. All I can say is carry on writing! I love forward to reading your work!accio-snitch⚡⚡⚡

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