Book title: Mystical Mutant

Author: Kikibtsstan

Genre: fantasy romance

Reviewer: helenl0511

Book cover: 4/5

My first thought about the cover is: the person who made the cover (Jewelsky77) must have really put her heart into the design.

To be honest I suck at arts and graphics, but I can see that a lot of effort was put into designing the layers and gradient change for the pictures. And the result is beautiful. I really like the girl with the crown, the roses (I assume it's pink roses), the background... it really gives me a mystical, and fantasy feel.

The cover is beautiful. The girl is how I imagine Fiona to look like. And I guess the roses mean love. It really fits the story and the genre.

Book title: 4/5

When I first read the title, the word "mystical" leads me to think that there will be some secrets, and the character must be living a mysterious life. The word "mutant" leads me to think about sci-fi. But when they are combined together, I can guess it's a fantasy or paranormal story.

As I read the story, the more the title fits the story. It is an amazing title, you did a great job.

Blurb: 7/10

The first part of the blurb really catches my attention. I really want to know more about the two clans and their relationship. The part that the Elevanas and Glorindians are mythical creatures that I never heard of, that are creatures created by you, really really interests me.

The second part of the blurb, to be honest, is not as interesting as the first part. I know that both the species are wiped out, and the only survivor is Fiona. So what? Why will it be hard for Fiona to overcome all the obstacles to live in the human world? Since her whole race is wiped out, I assume that she wouldn't face any difficulties created by the Elevanas and Glorindians. I assume that the problem she will be facing is adapting into the human society. Or maybe she will be hiding from some crazy people that wanted to find her for their own benefits. I can generally guess what will happen next without reading.

In my opinion, a blurb is very important for a story. If you want to make the blurb more interesting, you should add some more details for second part of the blurb. You can take a scene out from the book about an obstacle Fiona faced. And a few lines about how she dealt with it. For example, you can take out a few lines from the scene where she turns into her original appearance. It will definitely interest the readers to know more about her and her life.

Opening: 7/10

The prologue is a brief explanation of the history of the Elevanas and Glorindians. It is ok, it does interest me, but there are still places for improvements. I know the history doesn't really affect the story, but an opening is really important. So I think you should give more details about the mythical creatures, and about the history.

Some questions that you can think of:

Where do the Elevanas and Glorindians live? People will appreciate it if you give a teeny tiny bit more facts about the mythical creatures. They are creatures that you created, after all. Giving a bit more of details will have people hooked up.

Why do the Glorindians suddenly claim that they are more powerful than the Elevanas after co-existing for years? It's not possible for the Glorindians to claim that they are stronger for no reason. I think readers will really want to know about this.

Why will Fiona's parents talk to each other when they are technically enemies? I don't assume you will go and chit-chat with someone who you are taught to be hostile to, right? Writing a scene about how they met will attract more readers.

Why will the battle of the two clan leaders lead to the extinction of both races? Surely they won't be as powerful as a nuclear bomb, right? And Fiona's parents died during the battle without any reason. It's kind of weird. I thought they were hiding with Fiona.

It will be good if you really try and give more details, but not just say only a couple of words about it. The more details you give, the more interested the readers get.

Structure: 16/20

Half of the chapters are all dialogues of the characters. Since all the chapters I read so far are like that, I assume it's your style of writing. It's quite unique, since most stories use descriptive kind of styles. I was kind of confused at first, but after reading more chapters, I figured it out. It is definitely unexpected to see a writing style like this in a fantasy story.

There's a few grammar errors and typos in the story. But mostly it's good. The structure of the story is also simple, clear and organised.

Plot: 7/10

The plot is quite good. I love the fact that you created your own mythical creatures. The flow is good, it's at the right pace. There are also a few plot holes.

Character development: 10/15

Because of the writing style you used, I can't really feel the development of the characters. Most things about the characters are told to us.

One of the things I like about Fiona is that she is willing to do multiple jobs for a living. I like the fact that she works hard. However, I also have things that I don't like about her. She lacks the awareness that one should have when they try to blend in with the crowd. She just kind of helps anyone who shows some kindness to her, even Suzy. In chapter 12, Fiona defends Suzy, saying that Louis shouldn't hurt her feelings.

I've read almost two-third of the book, and I hope to see a change in her character. I hope she will really learn to be strong and learn how to say no.

Enjoyment: 7/10

I enjoyed reading your book. I will continue reading it when I have time.

Overall impression: 11/15

The writing style is really unique. The plot is quite good. At first it's not really interesting because of the minor problems in the blurb and the prologue, but the more I read, the more absorbed I am. If you are willing to make the blurb and the prologue more interesting, it will really be a good story.

Total marks: 73/100