Hi everyone :) I want to begin by thanking God for even helping me write this chapter and I want to thank all of you amazing readers who continue to read and give so much love, support, and appreciation to my stories :)

This part continues from Shivika's bedroom scene in Chapter 6 Part 2 :)

Mature Content Warning: This chapter Parts 1 and 2 (Part 2 to be posted tomorrow or Tuesday) contains content appropriate for ages 18 years or older.

This story will be likely rated mature from now on, but depends if readers want a mature rating

Author's Mature Content Writing Style: As a writer, I focus more on emotions when writing about intimacy and I write in a metaphorical and poetic way by avoiding usage of explicit words.

So to understand what is happening if you want to in the scenes, then pay close attention to metaphors, symbolism, and poetic lines along with word play. (Flowers and roses mean explicit parts of the body that are not being mentioned by me and likely will not)

Friendly Clarification: Yes I do repeat words and I do it on purpose because I write it in a poetic way or want emphasize a character's trait or an event. I am so sorry for the confusion :(

This week is the first time ever in my life writing mature content and if you read LTLHA, Chapter 37 then you know this is my first time even writing mature content and so I am at unease at the moment and I am trying to write this content and perhaps even failing at it, but I am trying and I tried for this chapter.

Part 1 has mature content, but a lot of the mature content is in Chapter 7 Part 2 which I will publish once I get some feedback on whether if it was okay and if readers are comfortable reading mature content that will be present in the next part.

Thank you for reading and if you liked this chapter then please comment, vote, and share.

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https://youtu.be/IBjS3aDIt78

Kisses breaking. Breaths rushing. Gasps winning. It went on repeat. The entire moment running on a toxic repeat that continued to happen over and over again. His lips taking a firm hold of mine as his hunger for lust possessed him and slowly dripped and hit me making me go on a high.

Our lips colliding into one shattering and bruising one another as they continued to fight and bite trying to overpower the other to see who would win. His lips continuing to hungrily ravish upon mine zesting upon the mysterious, yet dull flavors, finding himself enticed by them. My lips simmering and burning barely keeping hold, but tightening their grip moving and crossing back and forth trying to equally compete against him.

Seemingly, not once is he pushing me down to give into him...instead he likes the small tug of war we both have indulged in.

My hands continuing to clumsingly scratch and grab his cheeks, coloring them with the red paint found on my fingers, as I continued to press my lips firmly against his trying to catch to his pace that he was now beginning to increase. A hit of thrill running and escaping from my heart that continued to beat vigorously wanting to see what would happen if for once I would not surrender, but fight my way to my desires.

His fingers brushing lightly against my bare waist, pushing through the ripped fabric of my dress, before dabbing them softly into my skin and grabbing it firmly. My spine immediately arching lifting me up suddenly making my lips escape from his grip.

Our eyes capturing one another with silence hitting us except the deep breaths we both were taking with our chests moving up and down rapidly not knowing how to take a normal breath having winded it into the passionate, sultrous kisses we both had indulged for quite a while.

"You are...so...beautiful..." His voice gasping between breaths as he began to lean towards me letting the heat of his lips blow gently against mine making them quiver.

His eyes holding a dark shade filled with lustrous thirst that now was beginning to break ground and erupt within him wanting to be fulfilled in an instant. My heart fluttering upon reading his eyes finding a growling, dark creature's thirst appeared to have risen from my presence.

A wicked smile touching his lips, as he trailed his eyes up and down taking in each and every bit of me and appearing to unlayer me finding a temptation in releasing the bare tones of my skin from the silk fabric that covered me. Shyness falling on to me making my gaze lower with weakness touching my soul that was not able to accept its worship by him...fearing it may just be a lie.

"D-don't lie...I and beautiful...?" I whispered lowering my gaze tracing it upon my features finding flaws in each and every inch of it not able to see what Shivaay is able to see in me. What I can see are traces of buried pimples upon my flesh...laces of scars at the edge of my knee...and flabs of fat seeping through me...Indeed, what beauty am I?

Suddenly a force grasping on to me making me gasp as my eyes shot up finding him taking a grasp of my foot and raising it gently above in the air. My elbows slipping back making me collapse on to the bed as I encountered his seductive smile.

"Then let me show you what your beauty is...let me help you...find your beauty..." He spoke in a lowered, yet alluring tone as if he had other intentions. Curiosity touching me not able to comprehend statement nor knowing what I shall say in response.

Tracing my wavering hand across my arm and up to my neck feeling the damp, sticky paint that was clinging tightly to me not wanting to let go.

"W-what kind of...help can you give?" My voice shaking with heat now rushing to my cheeks not able to think the thought, but knowing that he had other intentions in this moment...intentions that a part of me was eagerly wanting to know and take part in...how will he show my beauty to me?...What will he do? My heart beginning to erratically beat not able to hold a rhythm wanting and craving his attention...a sudden craving erupting within me, not finding itself satisfied from the lunges of kisses that were bore upon it, not yet enough to fulfill my appetite.

Shivaay leaning closer filling my senses with that strong, toxic cologne he wore...a weapon aimed at shackling those who wanted a taste of him. His blue hues sweltering in mischief as they observed to only realize that somewhere I wanted to be part of his game that he was now going to play with me.

"We...have to work hard...real hard..." He hissed brushing his lips gently against my cheek immediately making flinch with a chill running through me not able to bear the meaning of his words.

My heart locking itself in a chokehold realizing that somewhere I was ready to take part in the game he was going to play with me. A wave of excitement rushing up my feet and into my waist finding a peculiar, unheard sensation budding and quivering gently...a sensation that had not been touched before, but aroused the folds of my flesh that were begging for him to once again lay his tender touch...arduous kisses...and brutal admiration upon me.

Play Anika...go on play. Won't it be fun to explore these paths where you have not walked upon? A sensuous thirst touching my dried lips where a weak smile touched them.

"H-how will we...work hard?" My lips trembling barely letting the words out finding a blush coming across my cheeks as a small nervous giggle escaped from my lips realizing what a shameful play of words I was indulging in at the moment.

Shivaay's smirk widening as his fingers trailed slowly against my foot making it tremble from the warmth of his hand that submerged into it. "It will be easy...to work hard...you just relax now..." He whispered with seduction enough to spark a river of pleasure that now I felt was beginning to trace its delicate smooth way down my navel wanting him to get a taste of it.

His fingers inching on the strap of my heel pulling my leg up in the air while he began to lean over me gesturing me to lay on down on the sheets of lust that he had only laid on his bed for me.

Pressing his knee upon my leg he looked down upon me continuing to wrap his fingers around my ankle sliding me towards him.

A breath skipping out of me with rivers now beginning to flow and beat volatility down my navel into that innocent flesh...begging him to lift them barricades and let them release...

My cheeks burning hot realizing that with a minimal touch...he is able to spark that ugly, yet fulfilling bouts of pleasure within me.

"Let me take care of you...and show you how beautiful you are..." He spoke as he looked into my eyes appearing to embrace my reflection giving a value to it...giving me value...allowing himself to grasp on to the fact that likely I never have felt cared for...that no one has cared for me even in my worst.

Wrapping his fingertips on my heel's strap, he smiled before looking at my foot rubbing it delicately making it tremble. His fingers beginning to relieve my foot of the heavy heel as I immediately took a hold of his arm.

"No... Please stop...This doesn't suit you," I spoke finding guilt in how he was holding my feet and taking off my heels. It feels wrong for him to do such knowing how much he has shown care and concern towards me in the past few days.

Shivaay smiling softly as he looked back towards me. "And that is one thing I like about you...the way you value me and others...and still respect those who wronged you and still show so much strength to face them...You are an amazing woman Anika and a beautiful woman...you are lovable...you are deserving of being treasured and cherished..."

And closing his words he engraved his name slowly on the surface of my heart that was beginning to find its love die for a former lover, who was a betrayer, and find this dead love being replaced with a new feeling...a new respect, a new value, and a new....appreciation for a man who really knew how to treat me well...a man whose name was Shivaay.

His hand gently wrapping and pulling off my heel before letting it fall on the ground and picking my other foot up and taking off its shackle as well.

I always see heels as shackles when I am forced to put them on...sometimes I like wearing them, but often I am forced to by others as a way to display a fake symbolism of what being a woman is...it is as if an object defines one's being...it is as if a woman is expected to be defined by what actions, gestures, and objects they display.

"Heels are like shackles for women...who are forced to wear them...heels are shackles for women who are forced to wear them and taught to display a façade...heels are shackles for women who are forced to wear them and embrace the pitiful rules of society that breeds ...heels are shackles for women who are forced to wear them and then continue to walk as symbols of honor for their families..." He recited his poem which in an instant spoke my thoughts inciting a wave of shock within me in how he read me so quickly...how once again he understood me the way no one has done before.

My feet diving into the bedsheet and without saying another word, I grabbed a hold of his arm pulling him down on to me and crashing my lips on to his. His body stiffening finding himself stunned by the sudden break in my demure that now had been replaced with a eruption of pure, fierce passion that now was spinning out of me.

His lips taking an immediate control beginning to ravage upon the taste of my lips slowly stripping them as he began to suck and consume my lipstick wanting to get a kick of ecstasy...enough to put him on a high...a high in which he saw me as a desirable woman that I am not.

Tracing my hand up his shirt before taking a hold of his neck, I pulled him closer to allow him to relish upon my taste knowing he earned if after what he had did for me today...how he stood up for me...how he held me...and now how is caring for me...and how he honors me as a woman and as a human being...His thoughts, his values, his way of understanding me is something that I have always wanted from those I loved except never getting them.

Our lips letting go for a moment as we found ourselves winded, but still submerging and drowning now in pure, crystals of utopic paradise. His lips taking a hold of my neck as he began to taste the damp red shade of paint still sticking tightly to me. Not once revulsed, he found a fetish in the bitter taste I had to offer.

My fingers taking a tight hold of his hair with my body lifting up not willing to accept how it was now completely being drenched with lust. "W-where were...you...all this time?...T-things would have been different...I-I c-could've escaped...a l-long time back..." My voice shaking not able to handle the sudden heat that now was simmering through both of our bodies.

"You could've escaped...from that dull, boring man...who didn't even know how to satisfy you...deprived you of every piece of sensual pleasure that you deserve..." He hissed further igniting a deep, red flame within my heart that now was begging him to show it what pleasure he could lavish upon its flesh.

A chuckle escaping from Shivaay's lips as he immediately molded them upon my lips once again introducing a wretched, wicked toxic taste that burned down my soul before pouring into the unbloomed flower I held below my waist.

My lips continuing to pour and rain down upon his desert of vice, sinful lust as he began to press his body slowly up and down against mine in an instant inciting an unusual sensation that was now soothing itself down my navel and finding it drench that flower that was now begging to bloom, but couldn't not knowing how to.

My feet kicking the pillows before he let go of my lips and began to drink the paint off of my cheeks appearing to enjoy an unusual fantasy. His hand trailing down my waist before taking a firm grasp of it making me gasp loudly upon feeling a tinge of liquid simmering within me wanting to escape, but not knowing how to....My eyes widening realizing what he unintentionally had done to me.

Unaware of what had happened to me, he lifted me lightly to the opposite end of the bed letting me hit the curtains of the canopy laying above us while my feet continued to dig themselves anxiously into the pillows on the other end of the bed.

"You okay?" He spoke softly, but somehow still alluring as I felt a shade of red on my cheeks continuing to deepen not able to confess what had happened or was happening to me at the moment.

"Um...y-yeah...I...I am...fine..." I whispered while the inner me was screaming a no and cursing him for how he had done something to it that she herself didn't know how to react to or handle at the moment...

A tight hold taking control of my leg as he lifted it up once again pulling me closer towards him further arousing that gentle flower that I was keeping wrapped within me. Lifting himself up on the bed, he trailed his fingers down my knee appearing to admire it finding himself enticed by its ugliness.

His eyes immediately capturing mine making them steady and holding them still.

"You are tired now...tired of walking on thorns...trying to live amongst those who never understood you or respected you...trying to smile with a broken heart...trying to live in a life full of shackles...you are tired and now I will care for you...let me show you what life is like...what life is like with me...Do you want that Anika? Do you want to see how I can change your life?...The thrills...the danger...the excitement...the moments of happiness...I can offer to you...so tell me...do you want me now?...Do you want me to be the one to care for you?" His voice spilling a dangerous, murky, moldy, yet bewitching poison into me...a poisonous drug that once popped will fully consume me...making me do things that will challenge my values...my ideologies...and each and every shackle that I have been tied with since birth.

https://youtu.be/ot3rnyMoPpQ

Tears slipping down my cheeks finding his words reminding me indeed of how I have been unloved all my life.

"Anika...what's wrong?" He spoke leaning down over me letting my foot fall down on the bed as he immediately took hold of my cheeks observing my tears that began to stream in painful silence not wanting to speak their miseries.

"Baby...what is wrong?" His voice gentle, yet full of allure as my gaze lifted up finding that bewitchment in eyes that were clearly speaking to me...wanting me to give in to its owner.

My hand clasping against my lips with tears continuing to revel down my cheeks. Turning around on my side, I attempted to hide my tears finding them as a revelation of how in this point my soul is wrangling and barely holding on to life...failing to find hope...failing to realize what my purpose is in life.

A warm touch lifting itself against the ripped cloth of my dress before dipping into the flab of my waist finding itself not revulsed, but tempted to feed upon it.

"Don't admire...an ugly, fat, plump pig...you have better options out there..." My voice cracking upon finding my tears spilling down on the bedsheet realizing how my revulsive beauty may be the reason why Ayaan cheated on me...why he left me.

A sudden force clashing against my waist as I felt his hand wrap around me pulling me into the comfort of his chest. His lips immediately taking hold of my shoulder as he began to lay tender, brushful kisses upon it not once nauseous by the gross taste of my skin. I laid still allowing him to lay me with his false appreciation realizing that even someday he too will leave me...like everyone else...that this fling will one day too end...and then I will be left alone.

His lips pausing for a moment with his fingers entangling in my waves pulling me closely towards him. My eyes watching the mirror across from us in which we laid...His eyes looking towards me as I laid with my back away from him wanting to bury myself again in those hallow realms that I have learned to live in.

"How dare you talk about yourself like this Anika? How dare you perceive yourself like this?...Why are you putting yourself down? You should be your own advocate...and here you are collapsed upon this bed burying yourself in illusive, wrongful, and pure false thoughts...Anika, why are you doing this to yourself?" His voice louder appearing to find himself at disbelief and not able to find clarity on the ugliness I carried.

"It's the truth...My truth...D-don't you see...don't you see me the way...others see me as. Don't you see h-how t-the w-world t-taunts me for my flaws?...Don't you see them l-laughing...l-laughing and jesting over this flab of fat I carry?...D-don't you see t-that my o-own fiancé...my f-first love...c-cheated on me with my...younger sister? And you know why?...Because she is more....b-beautiful...a-attractive...and i-intelligent than me...S-she has no flaws...none...She is loved by e-everyone...she is cherished by everyone...she is endeared and treated as a t-treasure by everyone...Y-you know why no one l-loves me?....Because I am so...ugly...hideous...g-gross...I am unlovable...and will always be...unlovable..." And with my voice cracking and breaking into shatters of whispers I let my tears consume the buried dark, mold that now was growing on my soul not allowing it to even live.

And suddenly he pulled me back wrapping his arms tightly around my heart as I began to cry finding my heart breaking into flawed, disfigured pieces representing who I am and always will be. His lips burying into the nape of my neck as he began to cherish it with kisses that he laid over and over again telling my beating heart that it shall not cry...not lay tears...but yet it still did.

"Anika...oh my God...Please don't cry...Don't lay your tears for those who never realized your worth....You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met...You are absolutely stunning Anika...You are precious...a precious noor that only some can have. The way you smile brightly ,with that one dimple on your cheek, that lights up your deep brown eyes makes my heart skip many beats in a second. The way you walk with your head held high despite the thorns you are forced to bear in your path makes me realize how even silence has strength...The way you have faced your problems is admirable Anika...It takes a lot to keep one's silence and not break in front of the world that judges you not knowing what your story is...The way you are still continuing to love your parents and your sister despite what they did to you shows how much you value relationships and love...it shows how selfless you are in love...I admire this about you Anika because this is something that I have tried to do, but failed...I have done everything to love those who have hurt me, but I failed Anika...So to see you still loving your family despite what they have done to you...my God...the divine truly has blessed you with beauty...You are a beauty Anika..." His words carrying strength, but failing to strike me as I laid still not able to absorb his words...finding them stream by....but yet somewhere admiring his ability to understand me the way no one has ever done. No one.

How is it that he is able to understand and clearly take in my thoughts and my struggles the way my own blood cannot? He doesn't know anything about me, but yet knows me so much more than anyone else I have loved. I don't know why fate has blessed me with him in this moment in time when I am falling apart and wanting to break down, but still cannot...for some reason I cannot.

His fingers brushing against my cheek wanting to wipe my tears away that were continuing to flow in silence. "P-please d-don't wipe them away...let them come...tears are what gives me peace...gives me solace..." I spoke as I buried my face into his arm wanting to lay my tears there knowing he would not laugh upon my miseries...realizing how he is the safest person to whom I could confess my thoughts to and not worry about him finding jest in it.

"Then let me lay here next to you...I too want to be part...of this peace of yours'..." He replied as tears rushed out of my eyes before my hands tightened around his arms letting him know that in this moment I did want him to stay with me.

Tears collapsed. Chills rushed. Tender kisses held.

We laid in silence as he lifted the covers up and pulled it over us pulling me closer into his comfort. Silence speaks and somehow it did between the both of us. He continued to kiss my tears letting them know they were cherished while he held me. His fingers continuing to brush lightly against my hair wanting to comfort me as I laid still remembering the life I carried...a life that I have carried for so many years...

My soul has been imprisoned and beated with ideologies and battered with values making bruises that have molded me into a feeble, weak woman who has been forced to even not dream...to not hope...but to only follow...to only follow my parents...my elders who see me as an object...an object that symbolizes and displays their honor. They never respected me because if they did then they wouldn't have been marrying my sister to my own ex-lover...It's not only my parents, but also my sister who never respected me nor loved me because if she did then she wouldn't have done this injustice to me...What have I gotten from walking in shackles on paths of only thorns?

"You are beautiful Anika...do not ever think you are not. Let me take care of you...let me show you what life is...Enough of fighting with yourself and walking in shackles...Let me show you your beauty..." His voice breaking the silence as he looked down at me.

A weak smile touching my lips as I looked towards him and entwined my hands into his while he held me close and embraced me with the warmth of his heart that was threading itself to mine. "He shall show me beauty...He shall teach me how to live...He shall unshackle me and set me free...but only to leave me...like the rest..." An unusual poem spinning out of my heart speaking its chords that barely strummed themselves wanting to give away.

Shivaay's eyes standing still realizing what I had spoken...what I had said knowing that indeed the boundaries we walked on were of a fling...a fling always ends...it never survives.

"Once you get tired handling a boring, dull Anika who carries this much baggage...you will leave...and you should. You deserve someone better...I mean look at you and look at me...You are mature, stable, and can have anything you lay your finger upon. And look at me...I am a wrenched soul who is disfigured and barely can even survive a day without collapsing...I am highly unstable...impulsive on the second...I cry and laugh and get angry each and every turning moment...I am almost on the streets considering the amount of debt I have from pursuing a degree that has led me to nowhere...I am on the verge of losing everything...not only by becoming bankrupt, but also losing everyone whom I have loved...So now you tell me...why will you waste your time showing me life and ravishing me with fake and false compliments that will put me on a high, but to only make me crash...once you leave..." My voice shaking and keeping its tempo, but failing knowing that in this moment I was about collapse...I was about to fall and crash like I have many days alone in my bedroom...alone for hours...where no one comes and checks on me...no one. The only difference this time is that I have a witness to my crashing and falling.

Our eyes holding one another as we looked into each other's reflections hunting for mysteries and wanting to unfold them somewhere knowing we both are falling...Indeed when I look into his eyes, I see something different and despite me in this moment pinpointing the luxuries of his life...I somewhere feel there is a darkness to him that is not letting him live.

Embracing the silence, we began to lean closer finding ourselves intrigued by our swollen, dried lips that were trembling finding themselves allured by the other...bearing their heat down upon each other and wanting to hold one another...to once again escape...escape from bitter realities into a fantasy that was like an illusive drug needed to keep us alive.

His lips brushing lightly against mine, but failing to lift up as I grasped on to them tightly wanting them to stay knowing I wanted this...that it was my escape. My hands dragging the red paint on to his neck as I pulled him down slowly leading him into the kiss. His pace surprisingly slowing down matching mine appearing to allow me to lead. Our lips molding into one allowing them to burn and rave encountering kicks of euphoria and hits of sensual blunts that we allowed ourselves to feed upon.

His hand slipping away down my bare waist making it flinch upon the thrill of heat that soaked into me making me once again feel an arousing sensation down the columns that never have met another's touch.

Our lips loosening with our palms colliding against each other's cheeks finding ourselves leaning in once again knowing our craving for one another's taste had only escalated. His eyes pulling me in to that dangerous darkness he carried where somewhere I was finding peace at the moment.

"We both are unstable beings...we both are flawed...we both have our lows...Do not value yourself by how much you have or what you don't have...You have something that many don't which is this...this selfless, innocence that you carry which you even don't recognize...you are a good soul Anika and damn it...you are pulling me in so fast and so hard. Crash, fall, burn or even go on a high...I will always be here for you Anika...Always. You and I are not going to end so fast...My heart knows that we both are going to have a hard time walking away...from this...The way you understand me is insane and no woman has understood me like this before. You are different and I like it...I like this about you and if you think I will get tired of you then you are wrong...you are a mystery that I want to unravel...you are a woman with so many shades and I like all of them...all of them...Once Shivaay Singh Oberoi chooses someone, he will not leave them easily...No woman has gotten to me Anika the way you have...I don't know what it is, but my heart doesn't want to leave you...and I will not leave you easily..." His voice admiring me subtly, but also carrying an edge of toxic danger filled with dominance appearing to stake a claim on me.

Do I like his dominance? Yes. Do I like him leading me? Absolutely yes. Does he speak danger? Of course. Do I like this bad side of his? The most.

https://youtu.be/1h3sm5Bgyvs

My nail lightly dragging itself down his cheek finding a sudden dark ash falling upon me...an ash consuming me and making my tears fall away now reveled with a deep desire...to want him to claim me...realizing how a man who commands the world with a dark layer is now here in front of me admiring me and holding me as if I am his most treasured gem.

"H-how do you know you won't leave me easily?" I questioned tracing my nail up and down his cheek before hitting his lip finding it tremble.

A smirk touching his lips realizing how the ambience had suddenly changed from pure pitiful misery to one now burning with lust and smoking with passionate sultry.

"I don't leave anything that I choose to have...You are someone I am not going to let go of easily...If you expect love from me then I am not going to give it. If you expect a relationship from me then I am not going to give it. If you expect some commitment then I cannot promise. But what I can give you is respect. I can give you honor. I can give you the care, comfort,...and...satisfy each and every need of yours'...each craving of yours'...each pleasure of yours'...I can do that all, but...only if you allow me to...I can give you the life that you have always wanted...free of misery, full of bliss...free of loneliness...to only have me who will give you moments like these where you will be the center of attention...where you will adored...cherished by me...where you will be allowed to rule...don't you want that Anika? Don't you want a man like me? Or do you want a coward...a cheat...a dull, selfish man like the one you loved?"

Silence touching me as I looked into his blue hues that were rumbling with a demonic presence that he embraced...not demonic as in evil, but demonic as one that is viceful, conniving, and knows manipulation really well.

He is manipulating me and I know it...but do I like it? Yes.

"Don't manipulate me...I can read you really well..." I spoke bluntly as his smirk widened before lightly pushing me down on to the bed.

His palm gliding down my neck slowly wanting a touch of each and every part of it before grasping on the drying paint finding himself fixating on the red shade and appearing to weave a dirty fetish in his mind about how he can remove it in many different ways.

My breaths deepening as I felt his fingers glide slowly against my neck trying to dab into its softness appearing to find something he would like to consume and suck upon. Wrapping his hand into the back of my head, he suddenly pulled me up forcing me to look into his eyes that now were drenched with a wicked phantomic presence that was tapping upon him.

"And yet you like it...You like my manipulation. You like how I am not like the man you loved before...I am not a coward like him...I am not dull like him...I can bring you on highs that he never can and never did... You are allured by how in front of everyone else I keep that dark mask and only in these rooms I reveal a different shade only for you...You are seduced by my power that allows me to command others and you, but to only a point that at times I surrender to your will...You love it that everyone fears me and yet here I am...doing everything to get your attention...here I am doing everything to lure you in so I can unlayer you one by one...You like it how I know what you want and how I can give it to you in an instant...You like it that I can fulfill all your needs and your hunger for pleasure the way you like it...You want my dominance...You want to be led...You want my protection...You want all of me and you cannot deny it..." His words having a dark edge to them revealing each and every feeling of mine at the moment...that I had towards him.

Silence touching me with layers of confusion and bewilderment holding on not able to understand how he had caught me so easily and so fast... and how he read me despite how he barely knows me.

He looked down at me beginning to lean towards me with his gaze moving down and up my body as his tongue rolled against his lips finding himself enticed by what he was seeing...something that I wasn't...What is luring him towards me...I don't get it and I don't see it.

"Baby...I can read you the way you can read me...If I hadn't read you then I wouldn't even dared to seek pleasure from you...I read you the moment I saw you and I knew what you wanted...so now tell me...do you want me to offer you the escape that you have always wanted and now you are so close to having it...?" His voice holding pure dirty, sick seduction that was toxic to its core and damn it I love it.

Will he commit to me? No. Will he love me? No. Will he give our relationship or fling a name? No.

Does he respect me? Yes. Does he care for me? Yes. Does he protect me? Yes.

Damn it I want him now.

My palm in an instant grabbing a hold of his shirt pulling him closer towards me taking control of his eyes that were now set in mine waiting with patience to hear my answer. A smile touching my lips as I leaned closer almost an inch away from his lips blowing heat upon it making them recoil in an instant.

"If you can read me...then tell me or show me what I want right now...You told me that you will show me my beauty...Then I dare you to show me...where my beauty lays?" My dare setting a raw fire within him as his eyes darkened showing that his ego was wounded not able to handle the dare.

There is something about him that is attracting me and I don't know what...It's the mystery...the power...the danger...something about him get's to me...He has his demons of course, but who doesn't? Everyone has demons and he has his to fight against. But in this moment...in this time...when I am falling apart and my family knows it...the only one who is holding and making me feel human is Shivaay...

A sudden warm touch clasping upon my knee making my heart skip up beat realizing where the touch came from. My eyes lowering finding his palm crease over and press gently into the soft skin of my thigh inciting a flare of weakness now lifting up my knees and into my waist tapping on the virgin fruit I held.

Red flaring on my cheeks mixing with the shade of paint upon realizing what he was doing and I somehow was shamelessly enjoying it. Lifting my gaze up, I encountered his as he chewed on his lip lightly trying to surpress that beast within him that was lusting upon me.

"I can show you your beauty...but you shouldn't have dared me..." He spoke in a lowered tone as I gulped nervously not able to think what he may do.

"It's okay...I won't hurt you because you are too special to me...but...I will bring you on a high that you will never be able to get off...even once it is over...now Anika, are you willing to want that?" He questioned making me tremble as I felt his hand slowly rubbing my thigh easing me into the moment that now was about to begin.

I don't know what I feel for him, but I can tell that in this moment the one who is the closest to my heart is Shivaay...Shivaay perhaps is my escape...I have been praying for an escape for so long and perhaps fate has brought me to Shivaay who will help me to do such...to be freed.

https://youtu.be/krT-GvNaXms

Do it Anika. Go on and play. Forget about norms and rules. Think about his moment...who do you want? What do you desire? Don't be good...cross the boundary...Forget about people and forget about society that has never given you anything nor valued you...Go on and fulfill your dirty desires and needs with the man who can fulfill them.

My body slipping back against the bed as I laid down wrapping my hands around my waist not able to bear the rivers of pleasure that now were forming waves within me...falling down to my waist...and drenching the innocent secret, unblossomed flower...rivers that wanted to erupt and begged me to let go of them who herself didn't know what to do.

I am a complete virgin. Right now, anyone who must hear this confession in my mind would be laughing, but honestly I am. This is new....all of it...These sensations...this arousal...the stimulation, temptation, and teasing of my body is all new...I have never felt this way with anyone...not even Ayaan...at times like these I do question then what did I have with him if he didn't make me feel this way the way Shivaay does...

"S-Shivaay..." His name escaping from the innocent knot of desire within me that wanted to be touched...teased...tempted, but scared of its unraveling...fearing that it may not satiate the one man who will untie it.

His jaw clenching tightly upon hearing my name as he trailed his lips against my knee making me immediately clench on to the sheet beneath me with my leg beginning to shake finding it weaken.

"When you say my name like that...you don't know what you do to me...Say my name again..." His voice holding a command while looking back towards me revealing a dangerous, phantomic presence within him that was now on a hunt...a hunt for filthy, dirty pleasure.

His eyes latching on to mine in an instant setting in his dominance as I laid still finding myself obliging him wanting to know what would happen once I say his name again...what he would do to me to make me feel the tempered, but exuberant hit of ecstasy that would lead me on a ride not experienced before.

"Shivaay..." I spoke again softly, but enough to set off the beats of that ravaging hunger that now was brutally beating him and pushing him to claim me.

His tongue gently lacing on to the fold of my knee before molding his lips on the scar that was upon it. "Your scars are your beauty because they show that no matter how bruised and battered you got in life, you stood ground and continued to fight...Your silence is your strength and you have a will within you to never fall despite how cruel fate may be towards you...Your beauty is your strength and willpower..." His words threading to my heart gently hitting the wounds it held...wounds from many battles it fought against its own blood and lover...Memories rushing as a tear escaped my eye feeling an ache erupting in my soul that slightly lifted itself not wanting to remember, but knowing it was needed for healing.

He lifted himself up stepping on to the floor as he looked towards me up and down trying to see where he would begin and where he would end his game. My waist clenching and sucking itself in with my breaths appearing to get deeper finding my chest moving up and down on an increased rhythm finding a small liquid slip out of that unblossomed flower.

"Continue to say my name over and over again...and I will touch and claim each and every bit of you that makes you beautiful...Let me teach you what beauty is...Let me teach you what a true man does to make a woman feel beautiful...not a coward, betrayer that you gave your heart to..." He hissed as he tapped his feet gently against the ground before walking towards the door and ensuring it was locked.

"S-Shivaay..." My voice continuing to shake as I attempted to breathe, but failing finding myself consumed with excitement that now was pumping through my flesh and beginning to lose control not able to imagine what he was going to do.

He is dangerous. He is toxic. He has moments of rage. He is a free creature roaming and growling with pure ugly, filthy thirsts...Yet here I am sitting in front of him wanting him...savoring myself in his presence...continuing to thread him to me...delighting upon the fact that in this moment, I was his center of attention.

He appeared to approach me as I laid my head at the end of the bed finding my world upside down. My toes curling into the pillows finding them losing ground not wanting to be part of this, but being forced by me who knows this is what I want...what I need...what I shamelessly have nurtured within me for years...it's not wrong to nurture such appetite...nothing's wrong with it.

He stood right above me as a smirk touched his lips when he began to drag his hands down my arms milking it with the red paint that lingered down my flesh finding himself roused with the sticky, damp paint. My back arching up finding his touch blowing on the mounds of the desert within me that begged for rivers to flow upon it...A trail of liquid warmth escaping from my navel flowing down to the petals of my flower which wanted to escape from me.

"Do you want it with darkness or light?" He questioned bluntly as my eyes widened realizing where we were going with this.

Heat rushing up to my cheeks not able to think what we were about to do and even imagine what or how we would do the deed. My hands tightening their grip on my navel that now was throbbing and bursting with pure exhilaration and eagerly knocking on my soul to give in...to give into him.

"W-what...?" My mind drawing a complete blank not knowing how to respond despite knowing what double meaning he was clearly implying in his question.

His smirk widening as he began to lean down towards me with his hands dragging down my wrists and entwining his fingers into mine tightly taking a hold of the silk fabric of my dress that laid wrentched with creases running through it form our previous encounter. My thighs clasping together tightly finding a liquid warmth gliding down me.

"Baby...do you want light or dark...when I introduce you...to the realms of pleasure...I thought that is what you want and I am here...to give it to you...So tell me now..." His voice low and husky knowing that is how I liked it.

My gaze lowering finding myself turn red as a solid tomato thinking about what we were about to do realizing that we were about to commit the deed. Adrenaline beginning to rush through my body with peaks of excitement and hills of anxiousness now diving and rising up and down right form my heart down to my waist making them tremble.

"I...I....um..." Barely able to even get a sentence out I snatched my hands from his grip tuning on my side burying my face into the bedsheet realizing how embarrassing this was. Oh my gosh, what am I doing? Wait...what am I going to do? What am I supposed to do? The thoughts falling from gravity and collapsing on to me with a sudden force not allowing me to even ponder over the possibilities that may happen...how he may hold me...how he may lead me...how he may...oh gosh, no I cannot even think of such finding the thought sinful.

"I guess you want it to be dark..." He spoke nonchalantly appearing to overlook my shyness as he waledk towards the large empire windows before grabbing the curtains and closing them shut blocking the afternoon sunlight that was scattering and falling upon me.

A shy smile appearing across my lips as I dug my fingers into the bedsheet pulling on its threads one by one just like how he was going to unknot me one by one...slowly and gently. The room turning complete dark with some light slipping through the red walls of the room creating a romantic, sultrous ambience that begged us to give into.

The bed dipping down as I felt him slowly crawl and climb his way towards me while giggle escaped from my lips feeling giddy with pure nervousness and excitement.

"Now...this isn't what I expected," He spoke as I felt him lean above me looking down towards me observing a smile upon my face.

"What did you expect?" I questioned finding his hand trace and entwine itself into mine before brushing his lips against my fingertips.

"A shy, nervous Anika is what I expect and see...but why the giggles? Is Anika excited...tempted...aroused...upon the deed we are about to commit that is making her giddy?"

His hand now beginning to rub lightly against my bare back which immediately curved inwards. My legs folding up finding a shiver run through me finding his heated touch simmer into my flesh and down into my heart that quivered not able to believe how it was being pampered.

"S-Shivaay...w-what are you doing?" My voice sputtering between deep breaths that I was attempting to take, but failing at the moment finding him weaving a thread around me slowly luring me into his darkness where he would make love to me.

My smile widening upon the thought of making love...Indeed, I always thought I would make love to Ayaan making him my first, but perhaps fate decided to thread me to a stranger...but a man who actually stands up for me...who protects me...who shows such care and comfort to me...was the one fate decided to make him my first.

"No more talking Anika...no more. Enjoy this moment...savor in it...lavish upon it...taste each and every part of it...Now only say my name over and over again...and I will see how I can help you find your beauty..." He spoke and before I knew it his lips molded against my back making me heave grabbing on to the bedsheet not able to bear the burning touch that he had engraved into my spine.

"Shivaay..." I whispered faintly smiling wanting to see what he would do again. His hand pressing softly against my back tracing it down the curve of my spine as he rolled on to me and began to appease its dullness with lustrous, fragile kisses. His tongue criss crossing my back as he began to increase the pace of his lips against my skin.

My feet lifting up wrapping into his finding the heat of his mouth unbearable with temptations and slews of erupting desires now trickling down my navel popping and begging to be released. Rose petals withering off of my navel wanting to leave finding the pleasure that now was throbbing within the folds of my flesh unbearable and tortourous yet fulfilling.

His lips grazing up my neck as he began to taste the paint upon it finding a blunt of ecstasy in the bitter taste of red. "Your beauty is this beautiful, strong back of yours' that allows you to hold all your burdens and walk with a head held up high...this back of yours' never let's you fall or collapse, but makes you rise everyday allowing you to face those who wronged you..." His words piercing little thorns of strength into my back as I felt his hand run down it inciting goosebumps along the way.

My smile widening realizing how I never realized indeed how I have held many burdens in my life...fought many injustices...and still am holding myself high because I never wronged anyone.

His fingers tracing against the zip of my dress finding himself intrigued by it, but waiting in patience knowing that only I had the right to open this zipper and allow him to bear me down.

Should I allow him to? Should I allow him to see me the way no one has ever seen me as? Isn't he a stranger?...But then why does it seem as if I have known him since forever? It's like we have a connection that was paused from a previous lifetime and now is continuing in this lifetime...My heart beginning to increase its beats with my thoughts going blank as the demon of lust began to dance upon my soul igniting it...flaming it...and torturing it...pushing it to go and give into sin...knowing sin is what I wanted a kick of in this moment.

Why wait Anika? Who are you waiting for? Love is an illusion...it doesn't exist. One day it breaks and shatters and only leaves one alone...empty...hallow...Love's last destiny is the graveyard where many other loves lay that many cherished, nurtured, and nourished yet they all met their end...and so did my love. My love was dull, boring...yet simple...it was innocent, naïve, and deprived of vice, yet, it died...and so...why am I looking for love in my relationship with Shivaay...we have a fling and that is enough for me...I get my needs fulfilled and he does his...and I guess these are the ashes fate has decided to give me...fate has shown some pity to me and perhaps I should accept it.

"Shivaay...you can help me...take off my dress..." My lips quivering barely letting my words out knowing that in this moment I was going against each and every value I have ever held. In this moment, I am burying my values in a coffin and submerging into the sinful ground now fully diving into the seas of vice...seas where I will be fulfilled...seas where my desires will finally find light despite burning my own self along the way.

"Anika...do you really want this?" He questioned once again as my heart skipped a beat finding itself weaken now being deprived of the one thing it nourished upon...integrity, honor, and values...all that I was now burying knowing that they were mere illusions which I cherished, but now knowing that they only have shackled me and imprisoned me all my life.

"Y-yes...just...just make love...make me feel wanted..." I whispered, but loud enough for him to hear as he immediately wrapped his arm around me turning me around and pulling me into his heart.

.......

What do you think will happen or do you want to happen? The next part does have mature content in my perspective, but that is all I will say for now.

Preview of Part 2: (Part 2 will be posted once I get some feedback from readers if they are comfortable with mature content being introduced in the story).

"N-no...continue...give me the escape...make me f-forget..." My voice cracking into a whisper wanting to ensure that no object in this room was to even hear about my dirty desire that I had formed from the filth of my heart.

With my lips shuddering, I closed my eyes shut not able to imagine what he will do to me, but desiring him to....wanting a moment of devotion.

His hand lifting my hair to the side before brushing his lips gently against my ear exposing his warmth of pleasure that now was torturing him wanting him to expose me to it.

"I can... give you... the escape...but slowly Anika...slowly and steadily...matters like these are enjoyed...the most...when desires...are...delighted and satiated tenderly...a high of the....drug of pleasure...is enjoyed the most...when its acts in a cruel, yet...gradual way...easing you in...pacing you gently..." Shivaay's voice low and husky enough to hit the tempo as my heart beats crashed and suddenly peaked with a wave...an unusual crushing wave of liquid ecstasy lifting out of my flesh pooling down into that secret flower I held wanting to blossom.

......

Thank you for reading and your kind support :)

Honestly, this is the first time I am writing mature content and if you want to get a deeper understanding of the metaphors or unusual poetic lines, pay close attention to word play and you will begin to understand what is happening.

(Flowers and roses mean explicit parts of the body that are not being mentioned by me and likely will not)

At this time, I don't want to go and use explicit words because this is my first time ever writing such content and I am at unease with using these words as I don't want this to be cringe worthy and vulgar.

If you wanted stronger language then I am so sorry that I disappointed and if some wanted lesser stronger language then I am so sorry as well. As a writer, I want to push the boundaries, but not cross them and at this time I am definitely unaware and unsure of what I am supposed to do, so please do bear with me and I will try to improve and I know many likely had more expectations in this part and I am so sorry if this part was kind of boring or weird or plain old sucked.

I tried my best to reduce vulgarity and keep class, but if you did not like this chapter and want me to cut or censor scenes then please do comment below or message me and I will cut and censor scenes :)

If you want me to tone it down then I can do that as well :)

Again, please if you have some time then do give feedback on whether you want mature content and hopefully I will update Part 2 by tomorrow or Tuesday :)

Friendly Clarification: Yes I do repeat words and I do it on purpose because I write it in a poetic way or want emphasize a character's trait or an event. I am so sorry for the confusion :(

Yes dialogues are long, but they show how both Shivaay and Anika are able to confess their true thoughts to one another in such ease reflecting how their relationship is moving at a quick speed which might be good, but also bad...

Anika and Shivaay's relationship journey is long and it is speeding up now, but the journey is long just like LTLHA in which their journey has been long and slow LOL :D

Thank you for reading and if you wish then please do vote, comment, and share :)

Ciao!

-Jasmine

Shivaay's Point of View will come back and I will try to balance Shivaay and Anika's point of views throughout the story :)

What did you like or did not quite like about this chapter?

What do you think will happen or do you want to happen? The next part does have mature content in my perspective, but that is all I will say for now.