" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

"I'm still kinda iffy on that... Why did Vanir accept on Duke so easily..."

Kazuma: As expected of the man I acknowledged.

Megumin: Why is this man so enamored with that stalker, I wonder... Well, compared to a certain person who'll go have fun with some female adventurers the moment you take your eyes off him, his devotion is pretty respectable...

Darkness: yeah, unlike a certain someone, he seems pretty devoted to the woman he wishes to live together with. W- Well, being unfaithful is one of the hallmarks of a trashy man, so I don't dislike it...

"Oh, should I try flirting with any girl I come across then ?"

Darkness: N- NO !! Um... I- I mean...

"Thought so."

Kazuma: What ?! Yeah, the bath incident was my bad ! But if you don't mind me saying, you guys are at fault too ! Megumin keeps sending me all kinds of hints but never crosses the line, and Darkness keeps flaunting her needlessly erotic body despite having someone !

Megumin: This guy has started throwing away the last shreds of his dignity !

Darkness: You really have been turning into the type of man that I used to consider my ideal as of late...

Aqua: ... I won't accept this. I won't accept a man with such an unknown background ! isn't it odd ? This is Wiz we are talking about ! Why is he so obsessed with her ? He must definitely be up to no good ! This is a Goddess' intuition ! That man is definitely not in love with Wiz !

"And just where did that intuition of yours has ever been correct ? What can someone like you who's never been loved know anything about romance ?"

*C- C- C- COMBO !*

Kazuma: You just don't want to lose the only friend you can have tea with, right ?

"She can't hear you, she's on the ground in a puddle of her own blood."

Aqua: ... Well, yes, but I still have a bad feeling about this ! It's hard to put into words, but I feel like this will end up with someone I really hate getting really really happy...

Kazuma: I see, I don't get it...

"Can I finish her off ?"

Megumin: Even so, now that Wiz seems like she's into it, it's not really our place to interfere. If you wish for her happiness, you should just let things take their course...

Aqua: ... ... I'll test that man.

"Oh boy... What do you even mean by that ?"

Aqua: I'm going to test if that man is truly a devoted and earnest man. Yes, I'll seduce him.

"... Did you hit your head or something ? Even for someone like you, that's something absurdly stupid to just spout out suddenly. What can you even do ?"

Aqua: Who do you think I am ? I'm the Goddess with 10 Million devotees of the Axis cult, the extremely popular Aqua-sama !

"Don't go lying about the number of followers, your nose will grow."

Aqua: I'm well-loved by the neighborhood kids, and even an old man gave me sweets recently; If I give these two a little bit of instruction, that man will easily fall before us.

Kazuma: ... Wait, hold on, give these two a little bit of instruction ?

Aqua: After all, we have the Loli killer who is extremely seductive towards anyone whose preferences leans that way, and Eroness who can take care of anyone who appreciates a more lewd figure. If he can avoid being led astray by the seductions of these two, I'll acknowledge him.

Megumin: Wait, is that Loli killer me ?! I won't do anything so stupid ! Even if it is to test that man's devotion, I am a devoted and principled woman too ! I already have Kazuma, so i'm not seducing anyone else !

Darkness: Stop making it sound like I'm in charge of all things lewd ! I feel like the way you guys are treating me is getting worse by the day ! I'm a little angry at myself for enjoying that kind of treatment...

Darkness: May I sit next to you ?

Duke: ... ... if you're here to solicit me, I'm not interested.

"... Well, I guess that's all we're gonna get out of this gig... Pfft."

Kazuma: She dressed up and put on makeup and everything, only to end up getting mistaken for a prostitute and dismissed... Pfft.

Aqua: Don't laugh, we'll be discovered... Pfft.

"To think she got all fired up and said that all nobles are well-versed in the art of cajoling men and whatnot when she was told it was impossible for her..."

Kazuma: "Very well, this is for Wiz's sake, I'll show you the glamour of a noble lady", she said. Ah, she was really cool back then.

Darkness: You are really funny. i'm not a woman of the night. I'm an owner of a small store here in Axel. The name is Lalati-

Dust: Hey, isn't that Darkness ? What are you doing here with a dress like that ? This isn't a shop fit for nobility, you know ? Hey, lady of the Dustiness house, now that you're here, why don't you treat me to a drink ?

Darkness: ... Have you mistaken me for someone else ? I am-

Dust: What are you talking about, Lalatina ? It's me, Dust ! We've adventured together and gone through a lot of other stuff too ! Don't tell me you've forgotten about that !

Darkness: 'Take the money and just get lost, you dumbass'. Hrm... There are always such people who come to pester you after claiming to have met you somewhere before, aren't there ?

Duke: So, what does the Lady of the Dustiness family wants with me ?

'That's it, the cat's out, just bail now, Darkness...'

Darkness: ... Seemed like I pushed my joke a little too far. I'll introduce myself once again. My name is Dustiness Ford Lalatina, the daughter of the Lord of this town and an adventurer. Please give this man and I a glass of the best red wine in this bar.

Barkeeper: There's no way such a cheap bar like mine would serve red wine, Dustiness-sama.

Aqua: Don't laugh ! It can't be helped ! Darkness is a noble lady, so she doesn't frequent such stores !

Kazuma: then why are you laughing ?! Don't do that, I won't be able to hold it in either !

"Stop, please just stop, i'm begging you... !"

Darkness: .. Then, just give me the most expensive item in this store...

Barkeeper: A barrel of ice-cold crimson beer, right ? Thank you for your patronage !

Duke: ... Wow, can you really drink this much ?

Darkness: ... I thought I would treat everyone in this bar to a drink to celebrate our meeting...

"Right, so after such a fiasco, what do you have in mind ?"

Darkness: I won't ever do something like this again ! Damn you Duke, how dare you embarrass a Noble like me so !

"Yeah, how dare he, when you're doing such a good job at embarrassing yourself."

Darkness: I'll kill you !

Aqua: Hey Kazuma, Darkness didn't catch his interest even after everything she did ! If you laugh at her too, it'd be way too pitiful ! Darkness, I think you did pretty well. Especially that line about "Celebrating our meeting" and starting a drinking party ! If someone said that to me, I'd definitely show them one of my special party tricks.

Darkness: AAAAAAAAAAHHH !!

"... So, did you get anything from Duke at all, in the end.. ?"

Darkness: ... That man, he wasn't swayed at all by my seduction or my status... I didn't misjudge him. He's completely different from a certain easily-seduced someone. he's gained a little more of my respect...

Aqua: ... So, did you experience the glamour of a Noble Lady ?

"Hm... Definitely not. She was clearly forcing herself, and it didn't play out well. Her aloof side is way more attractive. If anything, I guess the clumsy and embarrassed act was rather endearing..."

Darkness: I'll fucking kill you !!

Kazuma: Idiot, you went too far ! She is really angry now !

Aqua: Waaah ! You were the one who made her snap, so you do something about this !

Darkness: i'm not angry at either one of you, but all three of you ! You'll just make things worse if you run ! ! I'll teach you guys a good lesson before we return to the mansion !

"Ha, Kazuma. How was the night out ? You know, I don't blame Megumin for not trying anything with you, after all you've masterfully demonstrated you don't have any balls."

Aqua: So you dare shamelessly walk back in, you runaway NEET ! Darkness ground my temples into dust yesterday, you know ?

Kazuma: Nevermind me, what are the two of you doing in the yard ?

"Oh, right, you reminded me, I was about to shove Aqua's face underground for being yet again an absolute idiot, thank you."

Aqua: WAAAAAAAAHH !!

Kazuma: What did she do again... Wait, what's that growing in the field ? Hey, did you actually plant a mandrake here ? It'll become a really big problem if it starts screaming in the middle of town, you know ? Didn't you say you will wait 'till next year to plant mandrakes ?

Aqua: The seeds were cheap, so I bought them, but it shouldn't have sprouted so soon. Still, just what is this girl ? I feel like I've seen her somewhere before. Only plant-type monsters would grow so rapidly, but...

"And now you get why I'm so angry at her absolute stupidity."

Kazuma: Don't tell me this is a Tranquility Girl ?! Why the hell did you plant one here ?!

Aqua: W- Wait, I just planted the seeds that the traveling salesman sold me ! He was selling the seeds really cheaply too ! there's no way such a kind man would sell me a monster seed !

"They were cheap because it's a monster seed, you dimwit ! Did you not learn anything from buying a chicken egg as a Dragon's ?! Now you want to raise a monster too ?!"

Darkness: ... Good morning, Kazuma. So you dare shamelessly walk back in, huh ?

Aqua: Aah, Darkness is coming this way ! Do something about this kid !

"Oh, she can get killed, for all I care."

Aqua: You devil ! You really are a devil NEET ! Don't you feel anything for this newly-born life ?!

"Don't you feel anything for devils and undead ? So, Darkness, managed to cool down your head since then ?"

Aqua: Sorry, Darkness, it was my fault ! I took things too far yesterday ! i'm sorry, so please forgive me !

Kazuma: Yeah, Darkness, let bygones be bygones. Anyway, I'll make a delicious breakfast for you, so let's head back in !

Darkness: ... ... ... So, what exactly did they do ?

Kazuma: Hey, why are you looking at me ? The number of problems I've caused should be countable on one hand !

"He's right. As gutless and scummy as he may be, he almost never actually threw us in trouble. If you want answers, just go to the obvious."

Darkness: ... What on Earth did you do this time ?! Hurry up and tell me !

Aqua: Why does everyone immediately think I'm the culprit whenever something goes wrong ?! I really don't think it's good to be so prejudiced towards others !

Darkness: H- hey, why do you want me to leave this place so badly ?! ... hey... Aqua, isn't that a Tranquility Girl...

Aqua: That's not it ! No, that is just a cute little mandrake that sprouted quickly ! I did buy a Mandrake seed this time !

Darkness: You planted that here ?! In the first place, a mandrake isn't less dangerous than a Tranquility Girl ! Move, Aqua ! I'll take care of it before it develops sentience ! I won't tolerate any discussion !

Aqua: No, stop ! I already gave a name to er ! I thought she was a mandrake, so I named her Deadscream Bloody Mary !

Kazuma: Giving a Mandrake a name like that meas that you know exactly how dangerous they are, you idiot ! To think I even sympathized with you ! Darkness, hurry up and end it !

Megumin: ... ... Good morning. You guys sure are lively this morning too. What happened this time ?