" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Aqua: Waaaahh !! Yunyun ! Yunyun !

Yunyun: Light of Saber !!

Kazuma: Snipe ! Snipe ! Snipe ! Ahh, Yunyun ! Yunyun ! Save me !

Yunyun: Lightning Strike !!

"... ... ... ..."

*F-TWOOOOOOOOOM*

"... i'm fine."

Darkness: Oh ! Those are the famous paralyze Slimes ! It's a dangerous monster that paralyzes its prey before taking its time to digest it with its acidic body ! Ordinary people would be dissolved along with their equipment, but if I were caught, my clothes and armor would go first ! But don't worry, I won't give in to such humiliation...

Yunyun: Inferno !!

Megumin: ... Yunyun, can I have a word ?

"Darkness, stop cradling the slimes' remains, please..."

Yunyun: What's wrong, Megumin ? I'm busy looking out for monsters with my Search Spell right now... Ah, there are some monsters lurking around a short distance away from us. Leave it to me, I'll wipe them out in an instant.

Megumin: You don't need to ! Actually, what's with you today ? You're being unusually aggressive.

Yunyun: Do you really think so... ? I mean, thinning out the monsters who are living around the village is also one of the duties of the chief, right ? Plus I still have plenty of mana to spare, and I've brought plenty of manatite in case I run out.

Megumin: You're way too into this ! Which country are you planning on going to war with by bringing so many high quality manatite with you ?! We're a party, so there's no need for you to charge on ahead !

"... Says the one always begging to have all the spotlight..."

Megumin: Shut it !

Yunyun: Party... Hehe, ehehe...

Megumin: Stop doing that, it's creepy ! Why are you smiling when someone is lecturing you ?! It's rude !

Aqua: Isn't it fine ? We should be thankful to Yunyun for taking all of them out. There's no danger to us, and it's smooth sailing, so there's nothing to lecture her about.

Darkness: Slime... Slime... Paralyze Slime...

Megumin: There absolutely is ! If Yunyun hogs the spotlight, there won't be any chance for me to shine ! I'm going to find strong monsters around here to use my Explosion on !

"I'm starting to consider confiscating your staff for the rest of the trip... or even as long as we're in the village..."

Kazuma: Please do so ! What did you come home to do ?! We aren't here to adventure or raise your levels, you know ?! Are you that hung up on the fact you only are the second most high-leveled member of the party ?!

Megumin: I AM ?! Where's the strongest monster in the area ?!

Aqua: ... Say, Kazuma, Megumin is being really troublesome, so let's just let her shoot her Explosion off somewhere and carry her the rest of the way.

Kazuma: Yeah, she'd be less likely to do something unnecessary if she were to transform into luggage, so let's do that.

Megumin: I didn't expect Aqua to say that ! I won't fire it off here ! I came back home after all this time, so I am definitely not going to blow it in some small fry !

"... Yeah, not like you ever did tha-"

Megumin: EXPLOSION !!

*BTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

Yunyun: What are you doing ?!

Bukkoroli: Hey, I heard a really loud noise coming from the forest...

Aqua: Megumin's brain fried itself.

"And for Aqua of all people to say that, it's quite the threshold."

Megumin: Wait, please, I know it's my fault for letting loose without warning, but as I've said before, there's a proper reason for that !

Kazuma: Yeah, yeah, sure you had a reason. Did you get too irritated ? Or were you surprised after seeing a giant bug ?

Megumin: This man !

Yunyun: You just want us to listen to your excuses, right ?! Stop stalling and tell us already !

Megumin: Ugh... But you guys definitely won't believe me...

Darkness: I know that you won't say anything irresponsible. Don't worry, even if the others won't believe you, I'll properly hear you out.

Megumin: Darkness...

Bukkoroli: ... So, what exactly happened ?

Megumin: The Bomber Majin Moguninnin appeared.

Kazuma: if you are going to say such stupid things, I'll throw you off !

"Give me that staff ! You'll only get it back to Axel !"

Megumin: That's why I didn't want to say it ! I knew none of you will believe it ! Darkness, please lecture this man !

Darkness: Er... Umm... Well, I'm not that familiar with monsters... So Moganinnin was about to attack us. As expected of Megumin, you did a great job.

Megumin: You didn't even remember the name right, and your voice is completely monotone ! Darkness, I thought I could trust you !

Bukkoroli: Claiming that Moguninnin appeared of all things... Couldn't you have found a better excuse ?

Megumin: Leaving other monsters aside, there's no way I of all people could mistake any monsters that are related to Explosion ! Moguninnin was staring at Kazuma from the depths of the forest ! It's that Bomber Majin we are talking about, so I doubt that my chantless Explosion could've destroyed it.

"... Just what is a Bomber Majin anyway ? You didn't come up with that just to mess with us, did you ?"

Megumin: Bomber Majin Moguninnin... It's a mysterious monster that used to lie in a certain Mysterious Facility within the Crimson Demon Village. It is well-versed in detonation magic and can talk in a halting imitation of human speech, but no one can understand what it's saying. It'll attack anyone it sees apart from Crimson Demons, and will unleash Detonations without rhyme or reason at night.

"... Does everyone and everything in this village has a problematic personality ? That both sounds like something you'd come up with to try and sound cool and a slightly more unhinged cousin of yours."

Bukkoroli: ... Hey, what was that a bout "Everyone has a problematic personality" ? The Bomber Majin Moguninnin doesn't usually come out from the depths of the forest, though...

Kazuma: You didn't come up with that just so you'd have an excuse to let off your Explosion every day during your stay here, did you ?!

Megumin: How could you say that ?! Do you really think I'll come upw ith such a ridiculous story just because I wanted to let loose with my Explosion ?!

"Yes. Every day of the week, yes."

Bukkoroli: Megumin was always saying strange things; Stuff like seeing a mysterious glowing object fry off towards the East, or that she was a God of Destruction in her previous life, or that a mage who uses Explosion will end up with big breasts...

"Why am I not surprised..."

Megumin: You don't believe a word of what i've said, do you ?! You sure are bold for a NEET !

Bukkoroli: S- Shut up, me being a NEET has nothing to do with this ! Anyway, stop using your Explosion magic in the forest. It gets really troublesome when you rile up all the monsters like that. At least behave yourself while the chief's trial is going on.

Megumin: Bomber Majin Moguninnin really was there. Kazuma, you mustn't leave the village. Moguninnin has it in for all non-crimson demon men, particularly those with black hair and eyes.

Kazuma: Why does it have a grudge against such a particular target ? In the first place, it doesn't come out from the depths of the forest, right ? Are you sure you didn't misidentify a giant rhinoceros beetle or something ?

"... Does that means i'm not a priority target to that thing ?"

Megumin: Well, if it's choosing between you and Kazuma, it'd shoot Kazuma, but you're still at risk. And there's no way I could've mistaken a beetle for the Bomber Majin ! Anyway, Kazuma, don't participate as a partner in the Crimson Demon trial. I've also been asked not to participate, so just leave someone else be Yunyun's partner.

"Glad you value my life about as much as I value The Axis sect."

Aqua: What ?!

Darkness: ... Just leave it to me then.

Yunyun: Wait a minute, that'll be a problem for me ! Ah, no, I don't mean I don't want to partner with you or anything !

Darkness: The duty of a Crusader is to protect others. Don't worry, just leave it to me. I'll definitely protect you.

Yunyun: D- Darkness-san...

"That's quite smart. I'm not exactly a vanguard, and since you have enough firepower by yourself, partnering with a literal wall would be the most logical choice. Just stay behind her as you shoot, and you'll be a literal tank."

Yunyun: What's a "Tank" ?

Aqua: There's nothing you need to worry about with me here. Even if you get killed by a powerful monster, I'll bring you right back with Resurrection.

Yunyun: Aqua-sa... No, I'd prefer if we didn't have to use Resurrection in the first place...

Kazuma: Eh... Trials and partners and all that gives it a proper fantasy feel for once, so I really want to give it my all...

Megumin: Just watch the house with me, Kazuma. I'll guide you around the village. there's a pub that the parents of a classmate of mine runs.

Kazuma: Can we not go there ? There's a troublesome person staying over there.

"... ... Thinking again, we didn't really scout for places that would be suitable for Mary..."

Everyone: Ah.

Kazuma: So, yeah, I really don't have much to do tomorrow, so is there anything I could do to help out ?

Yuiyui: Oh, my, you're offering to help ? I'm going to gather materials for creating magic items from the deepest dungeon in this country tomorrow...

Kazuma: Sorry, is there something easier, like laundry or dishes that you could use some help with instead ?

Yuiyui: In that case, i'm a little concerned about Moguninnin, so would you like to explore that mysterious facility tomorrow ?

Kazuma: Are you still stuck on that strangely named monster ?

"That actually caught my attention. I've been meaning to go there at some point, so I guess that would be as good as an occasion."

Aqua: I wanna got too ! The name "Mysterious facility" makes it sounds like there'd be a ton of treasures hidden within it !

Yuiyui: I've heard that it's been explored many times in the past, so there probably wouldn't be much left.

Aqua: Come on, isn't it fine to act like proper adventurers and go exploring every once in a while ? Plus, with Kazuma's luck, we might end up finding something good.

"I'm more going for the lore, to be fair, so... if we do find something, I guess you can keep it."

Darkness: ... Why must you choose precisely the times when i'm not around to act like proper adventurers...

Megumin: Right, let's turn in early in preparation for tomorrow. Don't get too drunk, Aqua. Now, then, I'll go on ahead...

Yuiyui: Yes, I suppose it'd be best to turn in early. Sorry, Kazuma-san, we don't have much in the way of entertainment in our house... Though, playing around with my daughter in the same room should be pretty entertaining, heheheh.

Megumin: ... What is this parent of mine saying ? Just what are you asking your daughter to do ?!

Yuiyui: When we talk about entertainment out in the countryside like this, there's only one thing I could be referring to. Hurry up and let me see the face of my grandchild.

"In other circumstances, I'd praise your honesty, but this is waaaay too much forwardness."

Megumin: That's beyond forwardness ! Please stop making lewd jokes in front of your daughter ! Kazuma, you say something too !

Kazuma: Well, from a physical standpoint, I think it's a little too early for your daughter to be giving birth. Maybe after she grows up a little more...

Megumin: I'm already grown up enough to bear a child ! No, wait, that's not- Ah, wait, should I...

"Hey, you blame others, but you're not exactly helping defuse the situation yourself."

Kazuma: Exactly. It's already night out, so do try and keep it down. Also, you really should choose your words better. It'd be really embarrassing if the neighbors hear you say that you can bear a child and what not.

Megumin: I don't want to hear that from you ! Just whose fault do you think it is in the first place ?!

Darkness: B- By the way, physically speaking, I think my body is ready to bear a child at any time.

Megumin: What kind of stupid things are you saying now, Darkness ?! Don't butt in and go to sleep already !

Yuiyui: Sleep.

"Uhhhhh... Maybe not that harsh ?"

Yuiyui: Now, now, whatever happens next is completely up to you, Kazuma-san ! The nights are long around this time of year, so go ahead and do as you please.

Kazuma: I'm sorry, even for me, laying hands upon a sleeping girl's body is a little...

Darkness: Such stuff should be done with the consent of both parties ! I definitely cannot accept them crossing the line like this ! Even if you are her mother-

Yuiyui: Sleep.

Darkness: ... Even if you are her mother, I can't overlook that ! The duty of a Crusader is to protect others. I'll protect Megumin's chastity !

'And yet you gladly offered yours... i'm not gonna finish that sentence.'

Yuiyui: Y- You managed to resist it ?! My sleep is supposed to be fairly powerful... Tch... ! Seems like you've leveled up quite a bit since the last time you were here !

Darkness: Hmph, do you really think the same trick would work on a member of the Dustiness house twice ?! Is Sleep the only spell you can cast ?! Go ahead and render me helpless !

Yuiyui: Then how about this ? Paralyze !

Darkness: Weak ! The Paralyze slimes I saw in the forest today could put out a better numbing attack !

"... One dead drunk, one boasting and one magically asleep... Just go tuck in, Kazuma, we'll have enough to worry about tomorrow."

Kazuma: Yeah... For better and for worse...