" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Kazuma: It... It stopped... ?

"Huff... Huff... Huff... Serves you right... Fucker..."

Megumin: ... Kh ! The destruction on the side I blew up is weaker... Even though we used the same explosion magic, I lost in terms of power. As expected from a lich... With my current level, I can't beat Wiz's Explosion magic. But, I can't let myself be a loser ! O- One more blow... I'll prove that my Explosion magic is number one... !

Kazuma: I get it ! I get it ! When it comes to Explosion magic, you're number one alright !

Megumin: It's frustrating... Next time for sure, I'll...

Kazuma: Nah, we're talking about a legendary lich here. You've done well !

Dust: H- Hey ! That thing... Did we get it ? We got it, right ?

Kazuma: Watch it ! Starting now, let's refrain from making any careless statements ! Don't let your guard down and secure its surroundings-

Aqua: AHAHA !! WE DID IT !! WHAT THE HECK, AND THEY GAVE IT SUCH A GRANDIOSE NAME LIKE "THE MOBILE FORTRESS" ! THAT GOES FAR BEYOND A LETDOWN ! THIS IS THE END ! THE END ! NOW THEN, LET'S GO HOME AND HAVE SOME BOOZE !!

Kazuma: YOU IDIOT ! WHY DO YOU LIKE SUCH CLICHES !

"I MAY BE OUT OF GAS, BUT I STILL HAVE THE STRENGTH TO STRANGLE YOU TO DEATH !!"

Wiz: Ah... E- Everyone... Look...

Destroyer: *This machine has stopped moving. Unable to consume the excess heat and the energy required for moving. Danger level rising, all crew members are to evacuate promptly. I repeat...*

Lynn: H- hey... isn't that kinda bad ?

Kazuma: SEE, I TOLD YOU !!

Aqua: Wait, wait This isn't my fault !!

"Um, if we go by cliché... In that situation, isn't the whole thing supposed to go 'Boom' ? If something like this explodes in a place like this... Then the town, and everyone in here will..."

Wiz: N- No way... the town... My shop will be gone...

Kazuma: 'What do we do... I don't know what it's source of energy is... Can it be stopped in that state... And our two damage-dealers are out of it... Wouldn't it be better if I just take everyone and escape , To do that, I'll have to convince our stubborn crusader who doesn't want to budge...'

Dust: if the town disappears... What will I have to support my life... ? i'm gonna do it. HELL, I'M GONNA DO IT ! I'LL GET INTO THAT THING, DRAG OUT THE ONE BEHIND IT, AND MAKE HIM STOP IT ! LIKE HELL I COULD JUST ESCAPE LIKE THIS !!

Adventurers: ME TOO ! I'VE REMEMBERED WHY I'M STILL IN THIS NEWBIE TOWN EVEN THOUGH I'M ABOUT TO BECOME LEVEL 30 ! ACTUALLY, IF I DON'T PAY BACK THE FAVOR FOR GIVING ME CHEAP SERVICE UP 'TILL NOW RIGHT HERE, THEN I CAN'T CALL MYSELF A MAN !!

Adventurers: Y... YEAH ! The town... That shop... WE'RE GONNA PROTECT IT !! YEAH ! THOSE SMILES ! THOSE DREAMS !! WE'RE GONNA PROTECT THEM !!

"They... They're talking about what I think they are, right ?"

Frisk: i'm afraid so...

Papyrus: What is that ?

Y/n/Chara/Undyne: Nothing that concern you or that you should worry about, Paps.

Lynn: S- Some of the men seem kinda motivated...

Taylor: Y- yeah, I guess...

Kazuma: ... ... I'VE ACCEPTED THOSE PASSIONATE FEELINGS !! LET'S STOP IT ! THOSE WHO ARE GONNA GO INSIDE THE DESTROYER, RAISE YOUR HANDS !!

Crowd: WUOOOOOOOOOOOOOHH !!

Keith: ALRIGHT, HERE GOES !! GET INSIDE IT !!

Aqua: H- hey, Kazuma.i'm kinda scared of tagging along into that... With things like that, it'll be fine if we leave it to them. let's go ho-

Kazuma: ARE YOU AN IDIOT ! CAN'T YOU SEE THOSE HEROES BOLDLY RUSHING IN !!

"Yeah... brave heroes... So bold, and so brash..."

Kazuma: IF YOU AREN'T SOME PHONY GODDESS, THEN HEAL THEM ! COME !!

Aqua: EEEEEH ?! Why ?!

Kazuma: You're the reason we're in this situation ! Take responsibility !!

Aqua: I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING THIS TIME !!

Darkness: I- I must go as well !

Kazuma: Your armor is too heavy that you can't climb ! Stay with these two !!

Darkness: H- Huh ?!

"Welcome to the useless trio."

Megumin: I'm not useless !

"In this very specific situation, you are. You and I, when we're out of gas, we're useless."

Darkness: C- Couldn't you do anything about that ?

"Let's see... ..."

*Puff*

"... Nope."

Darkness: ... Then what was that purple glow earlier ?

"Purple ?"

Adventurers: SURROUND IT ! SURROUND IT !! AIM FOR ITS LEGS ! RETRIBUTION ! RETRIBUTION ! RETRIBUTION !!

Wiz: S- Somewhat, it feels like everyone is terrifyingly serious about this...

Kazuma: Well. When people have something they must protect, they can become stronger.

Aqua: They're all newbies. Where's this strength coming from ?

Chara: Their crotches. That's where. Also, there's a huge one coming your way, be careful.

Aqua: Kazuma, watch out !! Run while you have the chance !

Wiz: EEEEEEEEEEH !!

Kazuma: What are you doing, you idiot !!

Aqua: What ? Can't you at least be a meat-shield ? Talk about a useless lich.

Wiz: Waaaah, you're so mean !

Aqua: Guess it can't be helped ! I'LL LET YOU HAVE A TASTE OF THE GODDESS' IRON HAMMER !!

Kazuma: Hold it, Aqua. Our opponent is a golem, a machine. In that case, if we take away even one of its parts... It won't be able to move !!

Aqua: Kazuma, wai-

Kazuma: STEAL !!

Kazuma: ... Just as planned.

Kazuma: UWAAAAAAAAAAHH !! MY ARM ! MY AAAAAARMM !!

Wiz: Aah ! Kazuma-san !!

Kazuma: Uu... Aqua... it's broken; it's definitely broken...

Aqua: There isn't even a crack, I did cast healing on it just in case. Don't get carried away so much and do something stupid, okay ?

Wiz: Y- You shouldn't be using Steal on such an heavy opponent, you know... ?

Adventurers: We're pretty much done here. All that's left is inside here, huh. HEY ! WHOEVER IS BEHIND THIS, COME OUT ! WE KNOW YOU'RE IN HERE ! IF YOU DON'T OPEN UP, WE'LL BREAK IT OPEN WITH OUR HAMMERS !!

Chara: WHO CARES ! JUST SMASH IT OPEN ALREADY !!

Kazuma: Geez, I can't even tell which ones are the invader here...

Undyne: IT'S OPEN !! FIND THE ONE BEHIND THIS !!

Aqua: I won't be satisfied until I give that "person behind this" guy a beating as well !!

Kazuma: it's pretty specious inside here.

Wiz: But... It feels like it hasn't been used for quite a long time...

Kazuma: 'Anyway... We need to find the one behind this and make them stop the Destroyer... !' Hm ?

Adventures: There he is !

Taylor: Kazuma... This is... this guy is...

Kazuma: Y... You're the one behind this ? Hey, stop this thing from exploding- HIII ?!

Kazuma: Uwah... A mummy ?

Aqua: ... He has already ascended. And he did so peacefully, without a grain of regret.

Kazuma: No... He should at least have some regrets, no... , No matter how you look at it, it feels like he died all alone...

Aqua: hey, what's this... ? A notebook ? Did it belong to him ? Let's see...

*The higher-ups of the country asked for something ridiculous. That is, they told me to build a mobile weapon with this budget. I objected, but nobody would listen. I tried crying in apology, or begging them, but it was all in vain. I pretended to be crazy and tried to go running around with only my underwear, but the female researchers told me to hurry up and take it off as well. This country might already be done for.

The deadline for the blueprint is today, what do I do ? I can't tell them it's still plain white paper at this point. After all, I got desperate and drank away all the advance payment of the reward .As I agonized in front of the empty blueprint, suddenly, a disgusting spider appeared on the paper. While letting out a scream, I grabbed something near my hand and smashed the spider with it... On the paper, that is. In these days, such high-quality paper is quite expensive. And even if they told me to pay a compensation for it, I don't like any money. Like I care, I'll just submit it like this.

That blueprint actually got a favorable reaction. "That's the juice of the spider I smashed, I'm surprised you can even touch it." There's no way I could ever tell them that. Actually, the plan keeps progressing. What do I do ? All I did was kill a spider, but I became the head of the project. Yahoo !

I'm not doing anything at all, and yet it keeps growing closer to completion. They didn't need me for that, did they ? What the heck ? Whatever, do as you please. They kept nagging me about a power source... As if I care. So I told them to go get me an ultra-rare legendary ore, Coronatite.

They actually brought it. What do I do ? Seriously, what do I do ? I asked them for it randomly because I thought there was no way they could bring it ! If it doesn't work on this, it'll be death penalty for me ! Please work ! I beg you !

I was told that tomorrow will be the experimental run, but to be honest, I didn't do a single thing. All I did was smash a spider. Today would be he last day I get to lie back on my chair like that. When I thought about it, I got really angry ! I've had it ! I'm going to drink up ! Nobody's left here today, so I'm going to have my last supper without holding back !

When I came to, I felt a terrible shake; What on earth is this ? A hangover ? No. In the first place, I have no memories of what happened yesterday. The only thing I remember is that I went to the center, where the power source is, started scolding the Coronatite. No, hold on. After that, I said "I'm going to burn you with my cigarette" and then I brought my cigarette's flame near it, and...

I grasped the situation, and it all came to: Currently, at this very moment, it's going on a rampage. What do I do? This will definitely be seen as something I've done. Even if I cry or apologize now, they'd never forgive me. Oh no... if they drag me out of the mobile weapon, I'm definitely getting the death penalty. Damn it all !

Oh boy, as I though "This country should just perish", it actually perished ! The country has perished ! The civilians and the higher-ups have all escaped it seems, but I brought the country to ruin ! Oh boy ! I feel so relieved ! I'm totally satisfied ! I've made up my mind. I'll never get off this mobile weapon, and spend the rest of my life here. I mean, I can't get off, nor can I stop it. Whoever made this was definitely an idiot. Oh... the one responsible for making it... That was me.*

Aqua: ... T- That's all...

Everyone: QUIT SCREWING WITH US !!

Kazuma: So that's the "Coronatite" thing, huh ? If we take it out, the Explosion will stop, right ?

Wiz: Probably...

Kazuma: Everyone, go ahead and evacuate from the Destroyer. We'll take care of the rest, somehow.

Taylor: Alright, we're counting on you !

Undyne: if you screw this up and kill us all, I swear I'll murder you, kid !

Kazuma: ... But man, how do we take this out...

Aqua: I guess we have no choice but to cut it with a sword and take it out...

Kazuma: No, there's no need for that ! If I do this... STEAL !!

Kazuma: Heh. Just as planne- AAAAAAAHH ! SO HOOOOOT !!

Wiz: Aah ! Kazuma-san ! Freeze ! Freeze !

Aqua: What are you doing !! Heal ! Heal !! hey, between this and what you did with the Golem earlier, are you actually stupid ?

Kazuma: 'I- It's frustrating ! Being told that by Aqua and not having anything to say back...'

Wiz: B- But thanks to you, we have taken the Coronatite out.

Aqua: No, wait a minute ! For some reason, its glow is getting brighter !

Wiz: This is bad... At this rate, it's gonna go boom...

Kazuma: Hey, Aqua ! Can't you seal it away with your goddess power or something ?!

Aqua: This isn't a game ! Things don't go so conveniently !

Kazuma: Hey Wiz ! Can't you do anything about this ?

Wiz: I- It's not like I can't, but I need mana for that... Umm, Kazuma ? Can I ask you something ?

Kazuma: What is it ?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiL666dMpbw

Aqua: Hey, wait ! Kazuma's going to dry up !

Wiz: Sorry, but now I can use Teleport magic ! But... My teleport target points are all full of people, like the capital, so... I have no choice but to use a method called random teleport where you don't set a target point...

Aqua: What , then... Even when you teleport it randomly, if your luck is bad...

Wiz: yes... It could end in a place crowded with people...

Aqua: hey ! This is bad ! It looks like it's going to explode any moment now !

Kazuma: ... ... It's fine ! The world is actually vast ! The chances it'll go to an inhabited place are far greater than a habited one. I'll take all responsibility ! I may look like this, but my luck is actually good ! DO IT !!

Wiz: Y- Yes !

"Oh. You guys are finally back. And here I was worried you got smashed by something, or burned to death by whatever was powering it up."

Kazuma: You have no idea. A lot has happened, but it's all over. We somehow managed to stop the Destroyer's core. And it seems they've taken that mastermind's body outside, and are going to bury it. Everything's okay now... i'm tired, so let's go back and have something to eat.

Darkness: ... No... Something is odd.

*BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

"Hey, hey, hey !! What's going on ?! Didn't you just said you took care of the power source ?! Isn't it supposed to be over ?!"

Wiz: This... This can't be... the heat that has been piled up inside is trying to leak out ! At this rate, a huge steam explosion is going to come out of those cracks !

Kazuma: WHYYYY ?! After coming this faaaar !!

Aqua: There's nothing we can do now ! Let's run !!

Wiz: S- Somebody ! Mana ! Share your mana with me ! I'll use Explosion Magic to cancel out the explosion !

Kazuma: What are you saying, Wiz ! If you use Drain touch in public, they'll find out you're a lich...

Wiz: But... there's no other way...

Kazuma: No, hold on ! I can use Drain Touch too ! Even if I, a genuine human, used a lich's skills, it won't be a problem when they examine me. For the time being, I'll go drain mana from somebody and give it to you. Now to find the mana... hey Y/n, what' s your mana level ?

"I dunno. Pretty big though."

Kazuma: great ! Come here, and I'll suck it out !

"... I'm sorry what ?"

Kazuma: No homo !

"Oh okay."

Kazuma: Here I go ! Drain Touch !

"... ... ... Is that it ?"

Kazuma: I- It's not working ! You're not supposed to use mana, so why don't you have any ?!

"Beats me... There was something about a blue glow turning purple, so..."

Kazuma: We've got an emergency !

"I know. But I don't think we'll find someone else with heaps of mana lying around so conveniently..."

Aqua: Hurry, hurry ! We're running far away ! This town is already done for ! Let's start over from the beginning ! But when you to think of it, if the town goes boom, our debt will also- AAAAAAAAH ?!

"Sometimes, the convenience scares me..."

Aqua: W- What are you doing, you NEETs ?!

Kazuma: Listen, I'll share your mana with Wiz and have her fire explosion magic.

Aqua: No way !! Why do I have to share my mana with an undead ?! Besides, if you pour a large amount of my sacred mana into her, she's going to disappear !

Wiz: I- It's true, I didn't feel well after I got some of your mana before...

"Seriously ?! Why are these stupid technicalities constantly getting in our way now ?! If Wiz can't, there's no one left with the firepower to..."

Megumin: T... Then it's time... For the star to make her entry !

Kazuma: ... ... ...

Aqua: hey, don't drain a lot. Don't drain a lot, okay ?

Kazuma: I got it, leave it to me.

Megumin: Don't pus your hand against my back so suddenly. It's cold.

Kazuma: I was told that using Drain Touch on a place near the heart with thin skin is the most effective.

Megumin: HAAAAUUU ?! TH- THIS IS CRAZY! AQUA'S MANA IS SO CRAZY ! WITH THIS, I FEEL LIKE I CAN FIRE HISTORY'S GREATEST EXPLOSION MAGIC !!

Aqua: Hey, aren't you done yet ? I think you've drained enough already !

Megumin: A little more ! I can handle a little more !

"Hurry up !! It's about to go off !!"

Megumin: SORRY TO KEEP YOU ALL WAITING ! I DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE, BUT I DON'T WANT TO LOSE TO ANYBODY WHEN IT COMES TO EXPLOSION MAGIC !! HERE GOES ! MY ULTIMATE-DESTRUCTIVE MAGIC !!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jar1LTxxAeM

"Oh boy, was all of this a close call... But i'm glad everything went well in the end."

Megumin: yes, it was a great achievement.

Darkness: I have to thank you too. Good job protecting this town... Thank you !

"Oh, Darkness."

Darkness: You see... I would like to tell you about myself one day. And about why I said I wanted to protect this town.

"Yeah, you did say something like that.."

Aqua: Speaking of which, this time, you were ridiculously cool !

Darkness: I- is that so...

Aqua: But well, when it came to not doing anything, you were at the top. I mean, all you did was stand in front of the town. I broke the barrier, healed Kazuma's wounds, and gave Megumin my mana. I sure did lots of work.

Megumin: I did a great job firing two explosions in a single day. And moreover, the second blow obliterated the Destroyer.

"Compared to that, it's not like I did a lot... All I could do was slow it down a bit, in the end..."

Wiz: No, that's not it ! It's thanks to you pinning it down we could properly aim our spells and take it out ! And Kazuma too ! He had a few fails, but he did a wonderful job too ! He made a wonderful commander, defeated golems, took out the Coronatite and gave me mana.

Kazuma: No, no, there's the explosion magic you fired, freezing my hand, and of course, teleporting the Coronatite that was about to explode ! The true MVP is definitely Wiz !

Kazuma: ... So, what about you, who was throwing a tantrum about protecting the town ?

Darkness: ... W- What is this new sensation ?! WAAAAAAAAAHH !!