" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

3rd Person POV:

Sena: Wake up ! How long do you plan to keep sleeping ?!

Kazuma: What is it ? It's so early in the morning...

Sena: IT'S ALMOST NOON ALREADY !! Get up and come with me !!

Kazuma: 'I didn't get to sleep well because of aqua...'

Sena: Honestly... What kind of life are you usually spending ! Now, go inside. First, I'll hear what you have to say. I'll decide whether to prosecute you or not, so think well before you speak, okay ?

Kazuma: 'This is like an interrogation from a detective drama...'

Sena: Before that, I'd like to confirm something. Do you know what this is ? This is a magical tool used in places like this or in courthouses, which can see through lies. It is linked to one's magic, so it will ring if the speaker tells a lie. It would be wise to keep this in mind. Now, let us hear what you have to say.

Sena: Satou Kazuma, 16, adventurer... What's your birthplace... Also, what were you doing before becoming an adventurer ?

Kazuma: I was born in japan. I was a student back there.

*Tiliiiing*

Sena: ... Falsification of your birthplace and past records...

Kazuma: O- Oi... Hold on ! This isn't really supposed to be a lie or anything... !

*Tiliiing*

Kazuma: ... I was born in japan. Back there, I was a hikikomori who spent a life of self-indulgence.

Sena: Why did you pretend to be a student ?

Kazuma: 'Damn it ! I hate this magical tool...'

Sena: I've never heard of a place called "Japan"... Well then, let me ask about your motive for becoming an adventurer.

Kazuma: there were many people suffering because of the demon king's army, so defeating the demon king to save them-

*Tiliiing*

Kazuma: ... Was a thought that never crossed my mind. I just thought "Adventurers are kinda cool". I thought it would be nice to earn big cash and be pampered by some beauties...

Sena: V- Very well, next. Do you have any grudges against the landlord ? I heard you were complaining in various places when you fell in debt...

Kazuma: I did receive money for slaying the Dullahan, and I ended in debt after the town repair expense was deducted. Even if it was to save the town, I understand that it is meaningless if I go as far as to destroy the tow-

*Tiliiing*

Kazuma: -Or so I tried to convince myself. But what I actually felt was "Is this how you treat the hero who saved the town ?! I'm gonna butcher you."

Sena: ... I- is that so... Well then, next...

Kazuma: E- Excuse me ! Why don't you just ask me straight-forwardly ?! "Do you belong to the Demon king's army ?" or "Did you give that order because you had anything against the landlord ?!" I'll say it over and over, I just gave the order to make a random teleport, and I wasn't aiming for the landlord ! That was in order to save the town ! It's the truth, okay ?!

Sena: ... ... it's not ringing. ... It seems that I have made a mistake... I have only heard bad rumors about you, so... I offer you my apologies.

Kazuma: ... 'Huh... ? Her attitude suddenly changed... BEGIN COUNTER-ATTACK !!' ... Hah ! "My apologies" ?! Is that all ?! Geez... swallowing rumors right away and doubting people... Doesn't that disqualify you as a public prosecutor ?!

Sena: I- I am truly sorry...

Kazuma: Do you know of my achievements ? To think that I, the man who contributed most to slaying the demon king's general Beldia, as well as the one who performed a splendid command in the Destroyer battle, end up without a word of thanks, not to mention getting blamed !

Sena: I am very sorry, but this is my job, so... But...

Kazuma: But what ? Actually, I've been cleared of suspicion, yet you aren't going to serve me tea or anything ?! You might as well get me some katsu-don !

Sena: K- Katsudon ? I... I've never heard of that... If it's tea then I'll bring some right away...

Kazuma: IT'S TEPID !! can't public prosecutors here even brew some tea ?! Your attitude is quite painful to. I bet you've never had any boyfriends before, no ? While we're at it, how about we ask this magical tool ? About whether you've ever had any men in your life !

Sena: I haven't.

*Silence*

Sena: Because of this personality, I've never had any men in my life despite being of this age. Are you satisfied ? I hope you don't get too carried away.

Kazuma: I'm sorry. B- By the way, there's something I've been curious about. What are those bad rumors you heard about me... ?

Sena: W- Well... Other than those I was told yesterday, there was something about you stripping an underage girl of her underwear in public, and about forcing a crusader who's living with you to wash your back in the bath, and about you trying to abandon a priest in a dungeon because she was holding you back. They were all things that made me doubt your humanity... These... Are all rumors, right ?

Kazuma: Yes, they are.

*Tiliiing*

Sena: Do you know what people call you in the streets ? Scum-zuma, Kazu-trash, and such...

Kazuma: That's mean !! Just who said this about me ?!

Sena: ... Well, these are all things betwene you guys, so i'm not going to say anything... But, I'd like to ask just to confirm: You really are not related to the demon king's army ? You don't have any connections with the demon king's general whatsoever... ?

Kazuma: No, no, there's nothing like that at all ! Do I look like that kind of man to y-

*Tiliiing*

Kazuma: SHIIIT ! I WENT AND SAID IIIT !! In the end, I'm going to be put to trial ! No matter how I think of it, with the situation like this, I'm definitely getting executed !

"That's what you get for not shutting your trap when you'd need to, and pushing your luck too much."

Kazuma: Then don't just stand there idly ! Help me ! Find a solution !!

"... Well, if you want my help for the trial, just ask."

*POP*

Kazuma: Shit... I guess i'm really better off running...

Aqua: Kazuma ! Hey, Kazuma !

Kazuma: Yes, I'm Kazuma. Aqua, you came again ?! What happened yesterday ?

Aqua: For some reason, they found out that Megumin was the one behind the Explosion right away, so Darkness carried her and ran away... But today, it'll be fine ! Though they didn't like the idea, I made those two wear masks ! They will never be traced !

Kazuma: ... ... What was Y/n thinking of all of that ?

Aqua: Well, if you really want to know, he was very admiring of my work ! He even said "As expected of your intelligence stat. This is probably the best you could come up with, after all." !

Kazuma: ... 'No, that definitely wasn't praise...'

Aqua: More importantly, I waited for you the whole time yesterday. The guards questioned me over and over, and I went through a really hard time !

Kazuma: hey, listen here. There's no way an amateur like me can pick a lock with a pin ! And it was a dial-type, too.

Aqua: This station's anti-escape measures are no pushover I see.

Kazuma: if we don't so anything about it tonight, I'll be put to trial tomorrow.

Aqua: Fufufu ! Leave it to me ! This won't be as dull as yesterday's method ! I've prepared something nice for you ! I'll drop it in.

Aqua: use this jigsaw to cut the window bars ! I'll help too ! I'm sure even you can do that, no ?

Kazuma: ... I can't reach the window from here.

Aqua: It's okay ! i'm not that stupid either ! Here ! You can work while using this ladder ! Now then, we don't have much time, so let's hurry up !

Kazuma: I see. So, how are you going to get the ladder inside ?

Aqua: ... ... ... ... ... ...

Aqua: ... Wait a minute.

Guard: hey you ! What are you doing ?!

Aqua: Ah, um, no ! This is ... Um... refreshments...

Guard: I've never heard of any refreshments like that ! How about we hear what you have to sa- AH ! SHE RAN AWAY !! Don't let her run !! Catch her ! A suspicious person !! Come out and face me !!

(throw)

Kazuma: ... I hope tomorrow turns out to be a good day...

*March 26, 14:07 PM*

*District court*

*Courtroom number 3*

Judge: Quiet ! We will now begin the trial of the defendant Satou Kazuma. The defendant and advocates, step into the witness stand.

Darkness: Kazuma, you did nothing wrong. Leave the advocacy to us.

Megumin: That's right. We will will counter-argue that prosecutor until she cries !

"I mean, there's no need to go that far... But watching high'n mighty people fall down is something I enjoy."

Kazuma: I- I'm counting on you. I don't have any advocates other than you guys... 'Shit... What meaning is there in advocating in such a trial... ? But still, it feels reassuring when my comrades stand up to advocate for me...'

Aqua: It's fine. Leave it to me, i'm a clergy ! I also played "Gyakuten Saiban" which was famous in japan, so i'm well-versed in advocacy !

Kazuma: And then there's her.

"Umm... is it a wrong time to say my only experience also comes from Phoenix Wright ?"

Kazuma: ... At least that explains the get-up...

Kazuma: I beg of you, please don't just make random references for the sake of it...

Aqua: Eeeh ! Why ? You'll get executed, you know ?!

Kazuma: QUIET !!

"... Hey, Megumin. That person sitting over there, it's that 'Landlord' guy, right ?"

Megumin: Yeah, that's him. And he's looking at us... Kinda similar to the look of Kazuma when he looks at Darkness as she walks around the mansion in light clothing.

Kazuma: I- I don't look at her !

Megumin: I feel something improper from him, so I want to poke out his eyes...

"Something's wrong, Darkness ?"

Darkness: ... It's nothing.

Judge: Now, we shall begin reading the indictment. The prosecution is to step forward.

Sena: Yes.

Sena: And thus, during the Destroyer subjugation, the defendant Satou Kazuma ordered for the Coronatite to be teleported before its explosion. The Coronatite was transported into Alderp-dono's mansion, and exploded. As a result, the mansion was destroyed without leaving the slightest trace. While there may have been no human casualties, Alderp-dono is currently forced to stay at the town's inn. Teleporting dangerous objects randomly is forbidden by law, but he carried it out regardless ! And as a result, threatening the landlord's life caused a huge incident that could have shaken the country ! Accordingly, I demand the posing of a state subversion crime on the defenda-

Aqua: OBJECTION !!

"... A- Aqua, what are you... ?"

Magistrate: ... It's not yet the time for the advocate's statement. Ask for permission before you speak.

Aqua: Oh, no. I just wanted to say "Objection" so it's okay *SLAP*

Kazuma: 'YOU IDIOT !!'

Judge: The advocates are to open their mouths only during their time. Prosecutor, please continue.

Sena: ... No. I don't have anything else to say.

Judge: Then, I allow for the defendant and the advocates to speak.

Kazuma: 'Finally...'

"Things got butchered before they even started because of her... Stage fright, please go easy on me for that one..."

Kazuma: I'm counting on you for that one...