" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Aqua: No one's coming... It's been half a day already...

"I think we should lower the standards. Even though our final goal's to defeat the demon kings, for novices like us to only recruit top-tier classes is just impossible."

Aqua: B- But...

"Top-tier class adventurers are basically hero candidates, so it's extremely rare to get one right from the beginning."

Kazuma: if this goes on, no one will apply ! You might have a top-tier class, but mine's the weakest, and Y/n's almost nonexistent. Moreover, I'll lose my place if elites suddenly surround me. How about lowering the entry requirements...

"Trust me, no one will ever apply to our group like that, seriously, I'd even treat you whatever meal you want if-

???: I saw the notice recruiting adventurers with top-tier classes. Are you the one who posted it ?

"And you are ?"

Megumin: My name is Megumin ! My calling is that of an Archwizard, and one who controls the strongest offensive magic, explosion... !

Kazuma: Are you here to tease us ?

Megumin: I- I'm not !

"Did you just say 'Archwizard' ? Me and my big mouth..."

Aqua: That red eye, are you a crimson demon ?

Megumin: That is correct ! I'm an elite mage from the Crimson Demon clan, Megumin ! My magic's powerful enough to split the mountains... ! ... That's how it is. Do you need an excellent mage ?... By the way, I've a favor to ask. I haven't eaten anything in 3 days; so m- may you give me something to eat before the interview... ?

*Grooooooooowl*

"*sigh*... Here, help yourself and choose. This one over here will ruin me already, so what's a little more..."

Kazuma: What's with the eyepatch, though ? If you're injured, do you need this girl to heal you ? That's about the only thing she's useful for.

Aqua: H- Hey ! I'm not useless !

"You also make a perfect frog bait."

Megumin: Hmph... This is a magic item to restrain my overwhelming power. If you pull it off, a gigantic disaster will befall the world...

Kazuma: So something like a seal ?

Megumin: I just made that up. This is just a normal eyepatch, it just looks nice- Ah, AH ! I'm sorry, p- please don't pull on it, stop !!

'A chuunibyou... I have a distinct feeling there's someone, somewhere, who is currently laughing at me.'

Aqua: Eh... Listen, Crimson demons are born with high intellect and strong magic powers, with most of them having the potential to become powerful mages. They're well known for their red eyes and strange names.

Kazuma: Oh, I see.

*SNAP*

Megumin: YEOOOOOOOWWW !!! D- Don't let go of it like that !

Megumin: I- It's rude to say that our names are weird. From where I stand, the names of the people in this town are the weird ones.

"Can we ask for your parents' names then ?"

Megumin: My mother's Yuiyui, and my father's Hyoizaburo.

"... Right, so your Clan produces many powerful mages, right ?"

Megumin: hey, if you've got a problem with my parents' names, say it to my face !

"I haven't said anything."

Aqua: Adventurer cards cannot be falsified, she really is of a top-tier class, an archwizard. You know what that mean ?

"Shut up."

Aqua: What was thaaat~ ?

"I said I should learn to shut up..."

Aqua: I knew it. Sooo, I think I'm gonna take...

"I hate you... The Explosion spell's the highest-tier spell of the detonation series magic, isn't it ? If it's true, then it would be a great addition...

Megumin: Does that mean...

"Welcome aboard, Megumin the Archwizard."

Megumin: Explosion's the strongest offensive spell. On the other hand, it has a long casting time. Please keep that frog at bay until I'm ready.

"You take that one, the one on the other side is mine."

Kazuma: hey, let's go, aqua, we'll avenge ourselves this time. You're a former goddess, right ? How about showing what you're made of ?

Aqua: What do you mean by "former" ? i'm a current goddess ! My position as an Archpriest is just a disguise !!

Megumin: ... goddess ?

"She's just a little messed up on the head, don't mind her. She might make those claims from time to time."

Megumin: I see...

Aqua: G- Huh... W- Watch this carefully ! I haven't done anything great yet, but I'll definitely succeed today ! You're just frogs that are strong against physical attacks ! Let me show you the power of a goddess, whatever it touches shall perish !! God's requie-

Frog: *Chromp*

Megumin: She does make a good bait...

"Told you. Now that it's stopped, mind showing us that explosion on the other one ?"

Megumin: I've been waiting for this ! Darkness blacker than black, and darker than dark, I beseech thee, combine with my deep crimson; the time of awakening cometh, justice, fallen upon infallible boundary, appear now as an intangible distortion; I desire for my torrent of power a destructive force: A destructive force without equal ! Return all creation to cinders, and come from the abyss ! EXPLOSION !!!

https://youtu.be/sJBMECLORBg

"I THINK YOU OVERDID IT A LITTLE !!"

Kazuma: Amazing... So this is magic.

"Hey, there's another one that just climbed from under the ground. So that's how they avoid getting all dried up under the sun when there's no rain. Fascinating."

Kazuma: Now's not the time to be amazed ! Since that one is slow, we can retreat and then blow it to cinders ! Megumin... Megumin ?

Megumin: Ugh... Explosion's my ultimate spell. it's powerful but uses a lot of mana. Simply put, the mana I used exceeded my limit, so I can't move. To think that a frog would appear out of nowhere... No good, I'll be eaten, so can you help me... ?

"Don't worry, with my bones, which are stronger than steel, I can easily-

*CRACK*

*BROM*

"*Muffled* I THOUGHT IT WAS STRONGER THAN STEEEEEeeeeeel !!"

Kazuma: AAAAAAAAAAAHH !!

Aqua: Ugh... Ugh... It smells... It smells like fish...

"I think making a list of body parts that don't hurt would be way faster... Well, at least I could get something out of it..."

*Gaster Blasters: Lvl 1→ Lvl 2*

Megumin: it's smelly inside the frog, but the warm feeling isn't too bad... I gained some knowledge that I'd rather not know...

"And you told me something I'd rather not learn..."

Kazuma: listen. From now on, explosion magic's banned unless there's an emergency. Please get by with your other spells from now on, Megumin.

Megumin: ... I can't.

"You can't what ?"

Megumin: I can only use Explosion, I don't know any other magic.

Kazuma: ... Are you serious ?

Megumin: Yes.

"But if you know the highest tier of spells, shouldn't you have points for other spells ?"

Kazuma: Skill points ?

"You really were solely focused on her chest, weren't you..."

Aqua: They're something you earn when you pick up a class, it's used to learn skills. The more potential a person has, the more skill points they start out with. You can learn all sorts of skills by investing skill points in them. For example, the excellent me has learned all the party tricks skills as well as the basic Archpriest spells.

"Where did you learn party tricks, and how do you expect them to help in battle ?"

Aqua: Depending on the person and the class, there are restrictions to the skills they may learn. For example, someone with a fear of water would need more points to learn water or ice elemental spells... However, as detonation series magic consists of composite spells, you'd need deep knowledge of fire and wind magic to master it. This means that people who can learn detonation magic should be able to learn easily other spells.

"So it doesn't make sense to be unable to use low-tier spells when you can use the highest-tier already."

Megumin: ... i'm an Archwizard that loves Explosion. What I like is not detonation-series magic, but Explosion. Adventures will definitely be easier if I learn other spells. Fire, water, earth, wind or light... Learning spells related to this should be good enough... However, I couldn't do it; my only love is explosion. Even though I can only cast it once per day, even if I'll collapse after using the spell, my one true love is still Explosion ! The only reason I chose the path of the Archwizard was to cast explosion spells !

"Impressive... To display such determination even in the face of hardships, truly magnificent."

Kazuma: D- Don't encourage her !

"Why ? Weren't you moved by her speech just now ? To deliberately choose the hardest path to walk on, against all odds, isn't it a true testament to that grand dedication ?"

Megumin: I knew you'd understand ! When I first laid eyes on you, I knew you'd get the magnificence of Explosion magic right away !

"We'll be the unstoppable Grand duo of absolute destruction !"

Kazuma: 'I must stop this before she completely corrupt him !' I see. I think this will be a difficult path, so do work hard. Ah, I can see the town. let's divide the rewards equally at the guild. Let us meet again if our paths cross once more.

Megumin: N- No!

"Agh- 'M- My throat !'"

Megumin: M- My only wish is to use Explosion magic, the bounty's just a complementary bonus ! How about this: I don't need an even share of the rewards. If you're willing to foot the bill for food, bath and miscellaneous items, I can consider not taking any rewards. that's right, my power as an Archwizard is available at the price of meals and other miscellaneous fees ! How could you miss this opportunity to form a long-term contract ?!

Kazuma: No, no, no, our weak team isn't worthy of such amazing power ! That's right, it's too much to ask you to stay in our team with your amazing powers ! A team just starting out should make do with a normal mage. And look at me, my class' the weakest one, Adventurer.

"M- My neck... Stop it, you're strangling me..."

Megumin: No, no, no, it doesn't matter if you're novices or weak. I might have a top-tier class, but I'm still a beginner too, my level's just 6. When my level grows, I won't collapse after using my spells. So let's talk this over, and then you may pull my hand away, okay ?

Kazuma: It's too hard to utilize a mage who can only cast one spell a day. Let go, the other teams probably didn't want you either. Or rather, one can't use Explosion spells in dungeons or indoors, which would render you useless. Hey, let go of his neck ! We'll split the rewards equally with you, so let go !

"*Choking/Gargling noises*"

Megumin: please don't ditch me ! No team's willing to take me ! I'm willing to carry the luggage or anything when exploring dungeons, so please don't throw me away !

*POOMPH*

Aqua: ... I think he's out cold...

Megumin: Don't throw me away !! Don't throw me away !

Passerby: No way, that man wants to abandon that child...

Passerby: She's clinging to that unconscious one on the ground, and he even has a girl covered in slime with him...

Passerby: To toy with such a small child and to abandon her after that, what trash. Look, why is there goo covering the girls ? What weird sexual games did that pervert make them do ?

Kazuma: Oh no, they're gonna get the wrong idea... What's with that smile... ?

Megumin: ... Please don't throw me away ! i'm fine with any sort of dirty play you have in mind, even using those frogs from earlier, just-

Kazuma: All right, I get it ! Welcome aboard, Megumin !

Megumin: Hehe...

Aqua: What do we do about Y/n ? he doesn't look like he'll wake up anytime soon.

Kazuma: Just put him on a bench, he'll catch up to us once he wakes up.

"Guh... I swear, for a mages, she sure has an iron grip... Where did they go..."

???: AH ! You're finally awake ! I was starting to worry about your well-being, fellow adventurer !!

"... You looked over me ? Well, thank you... ... ?"

???: How improper of me ! Well, I am, like you, an Adventurer, but you can call me...

Papyrus: The great Papyrus !!!

'... Eris, are you f***ing kidding me right now... ?'