" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

"Kazuma, you're late, we've already started."

Kazuma: Don't you dare say that when you teleported your way here.

"Hey, can't be late for the celebration. It's the night the organizers of the festival booked the entire merchant district for that banquet."

Kazuma: ... Hey, is it a good idea to let the Eris and Axis cultists stay in the same place ? isn't it like locking a goddess and a devil in the same room ?

Aqua: You shut-in schemer, describing Eris cultists as devils is going too far. And to celebrate the end of the festival, right ? My children won't make a scene during this banquet.

"You do realize he was referring to Axis cultists with that, right ? Besides, calling him a schemer ? Here is a pot, here is a kettle, just add up."

Kazuma: Nevermind. After all, they're getting surprisingly along. No one's picking a fight...

"Does that mean to get you to behave, we have to make you party all day ?"

Aqua: That feels like you're looking down on us, but you're not wrong. By the way, i'm like that too. If you want me to be easier to deal with, then bring me some high-quality wine every day.

Kazuma: So you admit you're usually a troublemaker.

"Even Vanir and Wiz are here to party."

Kazuma: probably as part of the merchant district.

Chris: Come on, Darkness, drink up ! Megumin, you too !

Darkness: Why are you always so excited during banquets ? H- Hey ! Fine, okay, I'll drink something. But don't drag Megumin into this ! I'll drink Megumin's share too !

Megumin: I'm not a kid anymore, Darkness, so let me drink at times like this ! I'm old enough to get married, you know ! Hey, Kazuma, you're late. Help me explain this ! i'm only two years younger than you, so I'm not that young !

"Chris is completely wasted... Guess all goddesses love banquets, huh..."

Kazuma: ... Nah, you're too young to drink alcohol. Also, we're three years apart now. Wanna know why ? Because today's my birthday !

"Wait, really ? Why didn't you say so sooner ?"

Aqua: Huh. Happy birthday, I guess ? Okay then, Kazuma, give me a present now.

Kazuma: ... A present ? Hey, what' that supposed to mean ? Why doi have to give you a present ?

Aqua: I guess you really are an idiot who doesn't know this country's customs. Fine, I'll tell you. In this country, the birthday person gives presents to the people who took care of him the past year out of gratitude. It's something like "Thanks to everyone, I made it through the year safely".

Megumin: There's no custom like that. Happy Birthday, Kazuma. I'll give you a present later.

Kazuma: Well aren't you good at lying, you who-knows-how-old hag ! Hey, how about you tell me another one ? What's your birthday and age, huh ?!

Aqua: UWAAAAAAAAH !! Kazuma, you've said something you shouldn't have ! I'll have to beat some sense into you !

Darkness: Happy birthday, Kazuma. When we get home, I'll give you a present too. I'm sorry, I would've prepared one earlier if I'd known.

Kazuma: Oh, thanks. I guess it's my fault for not mentioning it earlier, huh. Megumin's birthday ended up passing by unnoticed too, so we can just celebrate mine next time. By the way, now that I think about it, when's your birthday ? You're a noble, so I'm sure there'll be one hell of a party.

Darkness: Huh ? M- My birthday ? ... U- Um, you see...

Chris: Darkness' birthday happened a long time ago. There was that huge party in spring, right ? Oh, now that I think about it, why didn't you and the others come to the party ?

"... ... Let me guess. You thought that something bad would happen if we came, so you intentionally 'Forgot' to invite us, right ? You thought we'd do something stupid to the other nobles, right ?"

Aqua: Wait, really ?! That's going too far ! Now that I think about it, back when we got that commendation from that kid iris too, Darkness suggested that we decline !

Megumin: let's punish her ! Today we're going to punish this rich girl who thinks too much !

Chris: That turned into a mess... Anyways, I heard from Darkness that you were the mastermind behind this entire incident ? I need to have a word with you, assistants.

"You go, Kazuma. There's a few things I need to discuss with Vanir, as well as... Honoring my part of the deal to convince Darkness to join the pageant..."

Kazuma: What did you promise her...

".. Let's just say... Don't pay mind to it if you hear a 'Master' or two from my room in the coming nights..."

Kazuma: Oh... Indulging.

"I need a noise-cancelling item from Wiz's shop."

Aqua: Hey, Kazuma, Cecily sent a letter to thank you. "Thanks to you, the Axis Cult's Axel branch has successfully achieved our goal. As arranged with the Eris Cult, the next year's festival will also be co-hosted by both Cults. This is all thanks to Kazuma donating so much money, so we will therefore consider you an honorary Axis Cultist".

Kazuma: DAMN IT !!

Aqua: WAAAHH !! You're awful ! What, aren't you happy with the thank-you letter my cultist put so much effort into writing, you NEET ?!

Kazuma: There's nothing to be happy about ! Why do I have to become one of your worshipers ?! This has to be some kind of punishment game !

"Please don't mention 'Punishment Game' in my vicinity. I see and play enough of these at night as it is."

Kazuma: You're getting laid, you have no room to complain !!

"... Aqua's still here, you know ?"

Kazuma: So what ? She was bound to know about it at some point.

"Her, yes. The entire town in about two days, I could live without."

Aqua: ... ... ... ... EeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHH ?!

"But your situation, Kazuma, this what happens when you donate all your reward directly to Aqua, and even help rebuild a church.. they tend to get a bit too grateful."

Kazuma: This should have canceled my role of scheming behind the scenes... I thought.

Aqua: Heheh, I see now, you're just being a Tsundere again. Kazuma's a Tsundere, so I should just hear the opposite of what you say, right ? It's like Cecily said, you're a giant Tsundere so whenever you say something mean I should just flip it around.

Kazuma: I hate both you and that woman.

Aqua: ... Why is that I don't feel any of the charm of a Tsundere from you ? ... ... Oh, right, there's something I want to ask you. I heard Eris appeared during the beauty contest, do you know where she went ? Sheesh, she's just too much. She went through all of the trouble of coming down here and didn't even greet me. She's so heartless towards her senpai.

"The fact you can still call yourself her senpai after actively trying to ruin her entire church throughout the festival is honestly awe-inspiring. Just like your cluelessness when it come to that chicken you still believe to be a dragon."

Aqua: hey, you'll suffer in the future if you keep treating Emperor Zel so roughly, you know ? When he grows up, I won't stop him if he attacks you.

"Then I'll just finish him off while he's small."

Aqua: ... Don't worry, Emperor Zel is kind and magnanimous, you don't need to be afraid... hey, Emperor Zel, come over here. This guy is as scary as the butcher on the third street, you need to be careful.

"... Take this thing away before I decide to actually act like I'm the butcher on third street."

Darkness: Haaa... And the work was finally done, too... I should be thankful that Eris-sama manifested, but the sudden influx of tourists was overwhelming...

Kazuma: Good work. Being a lord must be hard. And hey, Eris-sama manifesting may have brought in a ton of tourists from all sorts of cities, but that's helped improve the economy. isn't that a good thing ?

Darkness: I suppose it's good that there's so many people, but... Well, my father started to recover during the festival. Those troubling lordship duties are finally over as of today, so from now on I can go on quests without reservations.

Kazuma: Huh ? What're you talking about, don't you know that i'm not doing any of these anymore ? There's finally no more reasons I should, after all. If I wanted money, I could just use my cooking skill to open up a restaurant with cute waitresses and cater to my hobbies and make a profit at the same time. I don't need to go on quests anymore, right, Aqua ?

Aqua: That's right. I want to focus on educating Emperor Zel right now, so forget about quests; I used all of the money I got from Kazuma to rebuild the church, to fund next year's festival, and on the banquet. From now on, I'll e living leisurely off of Kazuma's money, so I won't be taking any dangerous quests. I want to live idly in this mansion everyday and be worshiped during the annual festival.

Darkness: ... ... ...

"Believe it or not, I'm actually even busier than you. Vanir and I thought up a 'Long-haul delivery service'. We're still in the midst of development, but once it's running, these items will sell through the entire kingdom."

Kazuma: ... You're making Amazon... Hey, wait, Aqua... Why do I have to spend money on you ? I don't mind covering food expenses, I guess, but at least earn your own allowance... And wait, did I hear that right ? You've already spent all of the money I gave you ?

Aqua: Yup, all of it. And don't worry about my allowance, I've thought up my second and third new money-making schemes.

"... ... ... ... ..."

Darkness: You were so enthusiastic during the festival... And Aqua, I heard that. What are these two new money-making schemes ? Tell me before you do anything.

Aqua: Nope. Not listening, lalalalala !!

"Well, if you'll excuse me, but I have capitalism to attend to. Vanir should be done with the first marketing campaign by now."

Megumin: ... it's too bad. The festival finally came, but in the end nothing fun happened. It was just noisy like always, and then it was over. Oh well, I guess that's normal for us.

Kazuma: It really is. A festival should be a merry, noisy place where you have fun, that's what sets the mood. Something as sad as fighting monsters during a fireworks display should never happen. I wish the festival was a little longer. At the very least, i'd like a proper fireworks display.

Megumin: ... That's right, it's Kazuma's birthday. I'll have to give you a birthday present.

Kazuma: I'm fine with anything. But to be honest, I'm kind of worried about what you'll give me. Don't be like Aqua and give me some strangely-shaped rock, okay ?

Megumin: ... Could you come to my room tonight ? I have something important to tell you.

*They say that everyone has a time when they're really popular*

Kazuma: 'And the fact Megumin just told that to me must be proof that my time had finally come. Though the signs ere already there. i'm not dense or deaf after all. It just appears that I will be the second one to achieve such thing.'

Aqua: Rejoice, everybody ! While I was loitering around the shopping district earlier, somebody told me that I could take the leftover liquor from the Thanksgiving festival after-party back home with me ! Look here, this is an expensive top-grade brand ! Let's party 'till dawn !

Kazuma: 'You really can't read the mood at all, huh ?'

Darkness: ... Hmm, it really is quite high quality. I was busy during the festival, so I didn't get to enjoy it with everyone else. So tonight, let's hold our very own after-party.

Kazuma: Huh ? N- No, no, no, Darkness. Hold on a second. I think everyone should turn in early tonight. You've got to be tired after everything that's happened, right ?

Darkness: Not particularly. Be it managing the festival or fulfilling my duties as the landlord, everything's over with now. There hasn't been anything tiring lately.

Kazuma: Well, look, i'm tired from fighting monsters day in and day out, so I'll be heading to bed early tonight.

Darkness: Are you joking ? You didn't even leave the mansion today, and you sleep more than twelve hours a day anyway.

Megumin: I think it's a great idea too, Kazuma. Let's just party all night with everyone, okay ?

Kazuma: Huh ?!

"Did someone say 'party' ? I wanna have a party ! I need to have a party ! So you better have a party !"

Megumin: Look. We're even eating your favorite, onion duck hot pot. And these aren't farm-raised ducks either, they're straight from the wild. They're full of experience points so they're twice as delicious.

Kazuma: ... ... hey, Megumin, is this really okay ? What about that thing tonight... ?

Megumin: Isn't tomorrow night fine too ? There's still plenty of time.

Kazuma: ... ... ...'FU-'