" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

Aqua: Please have some tea.

Yunyun: Th- Thank you... Um, Aqua-san, this...

Aqua: It might be cheap, but the tea tastes nice, right ? I've been drinking this recently; I bought it with the allowance Kazuma gave me.

'First of, how did you manage to convince Kazuma to give you an allowance ? Second... yeah... Hot water.'

Yunyun: Um... When I was taking a stroll in the park nearby, I found Chomusuke caught and being bullied by kids, so I took it into custody...

"Figures. A fur ball with a pair of wings is the perfect toy for mischievous kids. Is it okay ? It's not moving."

Kazuma: ... Hey, your evil God was chased by a chick, and now it's being bullied by kids.

Megumin: Y- Yunyun, you came at the right time ! It's not a big matter, but the situation's now a little bad !

Yunyun: B- Bad ?! Let me see... The daily serialization comic of Jack Frost's journey. Pen Pal recruitment column ? Hey, Megumin, could you give me this newspaper if you don't need it anymore ? Just giving me the Pen Pal recruitment will be enough.

Megumin: Just what are you looking at ? Here ! Look at this article !

Yunyun: ... Hmm ? W- Wait ! Megumin, this is...

Megumin: Y- You're reacting too much this time, Yunyun ! The article's not that bad !

Yunyun: No, I'm not overreacting at all ! The Evil god Wolbach is the one that was sealed in our village-

Megumin: Shh ! You're too loud !

"... ... I just heard something very interesting right there."

Megumin: You misheard. This girl will say weird things sometimes, that's why she was ostracized in the Crimson Demon Village.

"... ... Yunyun, what is it ? I can't believe that you'd be ostracized by these nutcases because you're weird."

Megumin: Nothing !

Yunyun: W- Wait ! You're the one who's weird, Megumin ! Never mind that, listen to me ! This Evil God Wolbach was sealed in our village in the past. The seal was undone one day and Megumin willfully made that evil god into her familiar behind everyone else's back...

"She WHAT ?! Megumin, would you mind... For ONE SECOND... STOP MAKING MORE GENERALS ANGRY FOR US TO FIGHT ?! SERIOUSLY, BETWEEN YOU AND AQUA, I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE HAS THE RECORD FOR THE MOST GENERALS AFTER US ! DIDN'T THE WHOLE BELDIA ORDEAL TEACH YOU ANYTHING ?!"

Kazuma: ... Leave him be, he'll be at it for a while, I think.

Megumin: N- Now 's not the time ! We need to subjugate the fake one that is proclaimed to be the evil god and making a ruckus in the capital, then pretend nothing happened !

"OH I'LL PRETEND NOTHING HAPPENED WHEN I SHIP YOU ALL THE WAY TO THE SOUTH POLE AND LEAVE YOU ON THE ICE CAP WITH NOTHING BUT YOUR DUMB STUPID EXPLOSION TO WARM UP ! I THOUGHT CRIMSON DEMONS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SMART, BUT IT SEEMS LIKE YOU'VE TAKEN A PAGE FROM AQUA'S BOOK, BY BEING AS DUMB AS A BRICK AS WELL !!"

Kazuma: I swear, all that pent-up aggression... Hey Darkness, use your connections to borrow that magic item which will ring when it detects a lie from the police station.

Darkness: I- I'll be right back. Ah, I hope we won't unearth more incredulous facts...

Megumin: Stop ! Please ! I- I didn't do anything wrong ! Lawyer ! I demand a lawyer ! I need a lawyer !

"I AM A LAWYER !!"

Kazuma: All right. Please answer honestly... So, why's the Evil God Wolbach mentioned in the news ?

Megumin: Actually, Yunyun and I had some run-ins with this evil god. That's why we were concerned and researched on the evil god in the village... Wolbach seems to be the evil God that's the patron of Sloth and Violence.

"... Sloth ? Kazuma, are you sure you didn't..."

Kazuma: Now's not the time ! Why was something that incredible sealed in the Crimson Demon Village ?

Megumin: A long time ago, our ancestors fought the evil god in an intense battle that lasted over several days and succeeded in sealing it. After that, they brought the Evil God to the crimson Demon Village to guard over it.

*Tiling*

Megumin: ... Someone said "The place where the evil God's sealed sounds cool", so they willfully kidnapped the Evil God that was sealed by people in the past, resealed it in a corner of the village, and made it a scenic point.

"... ... Now I get why the Demon King wants you people gone. You're a danger to everyone."

Darkness: That doesn't matter, we can't do anything about the past. Now we know how the evil God was sealed in the Crimson Demon village. Anyway, why did that seal break ? Who undid the seal ?

Megumin: It was probably the evil God who manipulated its minions to undo the seal so it could regain its original power and destroy humanity-.

*Tiling*

Everyone: ... ... ... ...

Megumin: ... My sister undid it while playing.

Yunyun: Wait ? Hey Megumin, this is the first time I've heard of this !

*Tiling*

Megumin: Huh ? Ah, that's right ! The seal of the evil God was undone twice. I undid it by accident the first time, and things worked out so well because of the help of an Onee-san who happened to pass by. My sister broke the seal the second time.

"... ... ... Funny, I think I got so mad it went all the way back to normal. If anyone dies because of that Evil God, remember that blood is on your hands."

Aqua: ... Megumin, Megumin, do you like the Axis Cult or do you hate it ? Cecily from my church said that you have some history with the Axis Cult and might join if I push you more forcefully.

"What does it have to do with anything we're here for ?!"

Megumin: I won't join no mater how much you pressure me ! Cecily's always giving me trouble and I don't want anything to do with that mob of problematic people. If you ask me, of course I hate it.

*Tiling*

Megumin: ... The cultists did take care of me in the past, so I don't really hate...

Kazuma: Hey, Megumin, what do you think about us ? Answer in terms of like or hate.

Aqua: Yeah, I want to ask too. You even made amulets for everyone the other time, so how do you feel about us ?

Megumin: W- What, there's no need to answer these sort of questions... hey, don't look at me with such a devious smile !

Yunyun: Um. This little one should be the sealed evil God, but the news stated the name Wolbach, so what's going on... ?

Kazuma: Wait, I just heard something incredible. This thing is that evil god ? Chomusuke's the evil god ?

Megumin: I already told you. This little one is an evil god and also my familiar. I was wondering what the Demon King's Genral is thinking, pretending to be this little one.

Kazuma: ... Hey, this cute thing here's actually the evil god ? Is the magic item broken ?

Aqua: Kazuma, I've always thought that you're a wonderful person with a gentle heart, and I've always felt deep gratitude for you.

Kazuma: hey, what are you saying all of a sudden ? Are you trying to get on my good side because my period of popularity here ? Even if you compliment me so exaggeratedly, I won't give you allowance...

*Tiling*

Aqua: No problem, the magic item's working just fine.

"Again, this has nothing to do with the matter at hand."

Kazuma: ... Did you awaken your sadistic side because of Darkness ?

Darkness: H- Huh ?!

"Yes, of course."

*Tiling*

"... Darkness and Alderp."

*... ... ... ...*

"Take this thing out of here before someone has to pay Eris a visit."

Megumin: ... Kazuma, sorry, but I need your help. Could you go with me ? Actually, Chomusuke has been a kidnap target plenty of times, and I think the person in the news won't let this go so easily. As its owner, I want to dispose of the self-proclaimed evil God calling itself Wolbach.

Kazuma: ... ... ...

Megumin: ... Can't you go ?

Kazuma: ... You really are helpless without me !

"Kazuma, what is this ?"

Kazuma: Dynamite. I finally managed to find something to replace nitrates after Megumin threw away the prototype, so i'm gonna make it a trump card for the upcoming battle.

Aqua: ... Hey, Kazuma, look.

*Puff*

Aqua: It shrank.

Kazuma: You moron !! You... ! I spent so much time making it ! What did you do to it ? What can I do with this ? Can you turn it back ? And can this still be used ?

Aqua: It definitely can't be turned back.

"... I hope you're aware of the murder intents you awaken within me."

Kazuma: Please don't hold them back. Do you understand ? I'm making this for the expedition tomorrow. You're quite good with your hands, make one to compensate for the one you spoiled !

Aqua: If I make some... For every three sticks, one will turn small, okay ?

"What are you, a shrinking gun ?!"

Megumin: EXPLOSION !!

*B-TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM*

Kazuma: ... Ho, that's a high score today.

Megumin: Ahhh... What a rare sight, everyone came along for my stroll. If I 'd know, I would've made lunch boxes so we could picnic outside... Kazuma, what's this ?

Kazuma: Heh. After obtaining the weapon known as wealth, I wondered if I could kill my opponent with money and tried making prototype number one. Watch carefully.

Megumin: Wait... I think that looks familiar...

Kazuma: Tinder !

*Pshhhhhhhhh*

Kazuma: Hehe... EXPLOSION !!

Megumin: HUH ?!

*B-TOOOOOOOOOM*

Megumin: Ah... Ahhh...

Darkness: A- Amazing, Kazuma ! When'd you learn Explosion ?

Kazuma: Hmph... The hardworking me has been leveling up in secret while all of you were sleeping.

"it's just explosive powder in a stick of paper."

Megumin: Ahhh... Ahhh...

Aqua: Kazuma, Kazuma, give me one too. I want to try using Explosion !

Kazuma: This is a prototype. I'll give you one after I make a dynamite with a longer fuse. I was worried and ignited it from afar.

Megumin: Ahhhh... Ahhhh...

Aqua: Fine, remember to let me play with it after you finish.

Kazuma: That's fine, but the potions are expensive and the supplies are limited, so you can't just play with it.

"Did you utter the words 'Supplies limited' in my presence ? With Windings company, even the sky's not the limit."

Darkness: I- If I use that, even a crusader like me can use Explosion ? Or did you learn magic for real ? H- hey, if you make a new one, I want to try it too... !

Kazuma: ... I'm Kazuma ! Number one adventurer in Axel, and he who controls Explo-

Megumin: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH !!