"What do you think you are doing?" I scold him while dragging his body toward his house. It's almost midnight when my phone buzzed, showing his name. I can't hear anything rather than his hoarse voice asking me to come fetch him. The club was so crowd, but white blue hair won't ever hard to find.
"Partying." He manage to answer me half chuckled, I want to punch him so bad right now. He rarely come out, we also only walk to the café or to Hongdae watching performance, but not with the club. Never.
"Sleep is better than partying, where's your key?" I ask him who's now gave me the key.
"You are right, sleep can't heal me. Partying help more." I know, but it doesn't mean you are allowed to get drunk and call me in the middle of the night. "Liquor tastes like trash but strangely feel good."
"Where's the boys? Why are you there alone?" I ask him opening the door to see how messed the house is. His clothes are everywhere, on the sofa, on the table, on the piano, on top of standing lamp. I sigh and take him to his room, laying his body on it. "Why are you alone?"
"I always been alone." He smile bitterly to me, put his both arm around my waist. "I am sick to hear them ask me what's wrong. How should I answer the what's wrong when nothing is right." My heart aches as he speak, how a lonely man. "Barbie." He then pull me closer to him make me restrain my body with my both hand so my body won't touching his. "I wish that everything never happen this way. I pray that this is all only a dream. But, to whom am I praying?" he looks desperate with his cracking low tone.
"Her voices when she call my name just like the music." He then smiles, referring the words for her, Jennie unnie. "She said she loves me forever." His hand boldly taking the stray of my hair and put it aside. Watching my eyes closely, clearly. "But how long is forever? A year? A month? An hour? A minute? A second? It's only a moment." The tears are coming, the first tear of him are coming flowing like waterfall. I feel in pain too, he is known as the strongest person when it came to the heart among the boys, and yet now I watch him crying over the girl.
"I am trapped between the dream of my family and hers." Then put both of his hand on my cheeks. "But whatever I do, both of them ended up got hurt. So I try to set them free. I wanted to become happier and stronger but why am I getting weaker? Why the wound gets deeper. Like pieces of broken glass that I can't reverse, my heart just hurts everyday."
"Yoongi oppa, please sleep. You might not want to talk about it with me." I assure him, pretending like I want his feeling to get better by not spilling the secrets of him to me. When in the fact, I get hurt to, I can see Jungkook in him, I can see how confuse he is to not able to choose between the present and the past. I always think that Jungkook is so greedy by wanting everything in his hand, now I know what is exactly feel, just like how can you choose between the air or the water in your life?
"I don't want you to suffer such a painful life like me, Jennie and Jungkook." He said while still looking into my eyes sternly. "I don't want you to be like Park Sewon." Then he softly whispering his words. Who's Park Sewon? But he seem feel better right now, so I decide to ask him.
"Yoongi oppa?" hesitantly I call his name make he furrowed his brows.
"Huh?"
"Who's Park Sewon?" there was minutes of silence when he pull me closer to him, his breath feels so warm, not like how cold his heart is. I bit my lips when he come closer and closer eyeing my lips.
"The poor unfortunate soul." Then he kissed me make me freezing in shocked. His lips are so soft and warm, my brain went blank and I am about to return his kiss not after Jinny opening the door harshly make me jolted backward leaving the drunk Yoongi on the bed. Did he just, kissed me?
"Good choice I come with you." She said while eyeing Yoongi who's now looking at her directly. "Don't play with her. Because you simply dig a hole to bury yourself alive by doing it, fucker."
--
"Eat well, Jungkook." Marco told Jungkook who's now sitting in front of him at the living room. It's the day he could go from the hospital. We have dinner with the boys and Marco proudly showing off his cooking skill to Taehyung and Jin when he prepared the meal lately. The boys showering Marco with flowery words as they eat everything on the table, make me chuckled by how brutal they could be in front of the food.
"I think I'll come everyday for the meal, right Taehyung?" Jimin jokingly eat his beef and then watching Taehyung for the respond, but the guy he mentioned only looking at him blankly while munching his meal. The boys will always be boys.
"You can always come." Mom sweetly saying that to Jimin, earning his smile. "Soomi, you also eat well." Mom words make me look at the girl who got silent after we come, she keeps eyeing Jungkook like she is ready to eat him whole with her stare. She gave mom a tiny smile and then looking at me, but watching me who look at her first she looked away put his spoon on her bowl.
"I heard you fight the girl in your university." I look around startled when her voice come from nowhere, I am in my room after changing my clothes. She is on my bed, holding iron man's figure I had hide above my bed, the gift I should've gave Jungkook for his birthday.
"Put it down." I command her, she does nothing but look at me.
"Do you hate me?" she ask me and then put the figure down to my bed, standing in front of me.
"No. I don't hate you." I said make her snort on me. Why do I feel like want to slap her too now? "I just feel better when you are not around." I added make her stare changed in a split of second, she is terrifying. I can say by how she look at me now.
"Jungkook loves me." You are right. "He will keep come to me even when you are around." I hate it, but its all right. "No matter how far you reach for him, it's just an empty dream. Wake up."
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