I am afraid to go to canteen after my class ended, I am afraid that my step brother will come and talk to me. So I refused the three of my friends invitation to hang out at the canteen. I told them I have something to do at home. And they let me go.
I walked alone to the train station and looking for my card to buy the ticket. But I cant find it. God, did I just lost it, again. Just now? I cursed under my breath and sitting in a chair inside the station, taking my belongings out of my bag but no card to be founded.
"I'll make sure to glue it on my hand later." I said promising my self until I heard chuckled from my left which is make me startled. "What are you doing in here?" that's what I could process to say when I see him already in here with me.
"Its relieved, I though you will hang out with your friends again before going home." He said and then hand me something with his look – soft hand. That's my train card, I look at him, want an explanation why did he have it rather than me. It's mine by the way. "You gave it to me after you made me one." He said and then I take it carefully don't wanting to touch him, even though I wonder how soft it could feel.
"Thanks." I muttered refuse to look at him. I will took the next train, so I stay sit down on the chair waiting for him to go away. But he stay still. "You have something to say again?" I try to sound irritate to him, wanting to know why didn't he leave.
"Can you accompany me somewhere? I wanted to go there to visit someone." She said while looking at the front of us, one old woman and her grand daughter is playing around which make me feel warm.
"I can't, so go off by yourself." I state and then grab my bag, swinging it to my shoulder. I should run away before I lost my defend and do whatever he said. I am his slave as I promise to take care of him to my mom that day. But then I feel his foot step following mine until we reach the ticket machine.
"Noona~" he said make me cringe. I hug my self, because goose bump is all over my body.
"Stop calling me noona!" I state and then taking out my card from my pocket. But when I am about to set it in he grab my card and bring it until the top of his head. Why did he always manage to ruin my life?
"Noona please!" he plea but then my hand automatically hug my body again, why did the nickname he gave to me bothering my body. Goose bump already creeping until my neck.
"Don't call me that." I tell him again now a bit louder. I jump try to take my card on his had, but it's out of my area.
"Okay. If you accompany me, I will stop calling you noona." What kind of bet is that. Do I look a foolish in front of him? I drained my energy to jump and scream so now I touch my knee while take my breath harshly.
"This kid." I cursed pointing at him who's now standing with his smug smile. I wanna punch his cheeks so bad. God, help me.
"I pretend to not know you all this time in the university. So give my payment." And that's when I know that I lost.
And here we are, take the train to Busan sitting side by side. I want to sit on the other desk but he tied my hand with his bag string. His bag is on his laps, taking care of his bag as if he had something important like gold in it. What am I for him? A dog? He is so into his though looking outside the train until we reach the destination, so I don't bothering him. I always like when he is silent.
We walk and took the cab, to the funeral. I refuse to come to my father's funeral. Its only mom and Marco who went there, I cant believe I will ever come to here. He take something from his bag, that's when I clearly understand what he took care inside his bag lately, flower. He put it on one of his mother and then one to the fathers grave. He looked at me after that, raising his hand to reach mine. And I absentmindedly take his hand while sitting with him like kids.
"Dad, I bring her." My vision getting blurred when I heard his whisper to the stone in front of us. I looked at him who's now smile proudly to the stone.
"I promise him." He said after he looked at me back.
I heard familiar sobs, not fully understand whose sobs is that until he come and hide my face fully on his chest. "Stop crying, dad will not liking it." He said softly put my hair behind my ear and than stroking my hair.
So its mine. The familiar sobs I've heard lately is mine. The sobs that almost years I never heard is mine. Its mine.
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