[aaaAaaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHGHHH

*guilt and self-loathing intensifies*

I HAVE RETURNED, ASSHOLES

HERE'S MY SHIT. LITERALLY, THAT'S WHAT THIS IS—it's just filler, technically speaking—*scremS*

I TRIED MY BEST. ENJOY IT. AT LEAST FIND IT DECENT.

LOVE ME.

pls

my views are going down due to my inactivity—*violent coughiNG*—I'm actually dying

٩( ᐛ )و ♥︎

Alright, later you nERDS, I'm gonna go scream at birds.]

Stay Creepy, My Friends!~

Chapter 43

Elizabeth's POV

The moon looks so pretty tonight. Its full figure radiated so much light that it practically illuminated the forest like the sun would. I can't help but stare at it, unmoving, unthinking. Sometimes I don't feel like I'm breathing at all. It sets my nerves at ease; makes me forget about the residual pain in my limbs and the sticky, viscous blood on my skin.

I can't remember what I did. All I can recall is the aching hunger of the mouths upon coming home, then blackness, and then I found myself trudging through the forest covered in someone else's blood. The thing is, I didn't panic immediately like the last time I blacked out. Ironically, I was calm and kept strolling through the woods as if I was on a nature walk. The mouths weren't bothering me anymore; I was filled and numb. Pungent metal still burns my tongue every time I swallow.

Despite my lack of concern for the blood on me, I absolutely didn't want to track any of it into the cabin. Instead, I ordered Caedis to clean me off with water from the nearby creek. It was annoying to not be given any signal for when he would dump cold water onto me, but I got used to it eventually. Unfortunately, I failed to realize just how badly the blood had stained my body. I had to wait outside, half naked, shivering, while Caedis worked to scrub every bit of blood off me with rags he found in the cabin. So I ended up staring up at the moon to pass the time and give my mind something to focus on.

It's so beautiful.

What did I kill?

I could stare at it all night.

Who did I murder?

I can't remember. It's all blank. I can't remember.

I can't keep doing this, especially not with the plans I have in store. I'm so close to success. So close!

My helpful specimen has a done a good job of keeping watch at the mansion, observing how everyone operates, reporting to me whatever happenings go on. No one has a clue he's there, which is strange but lucky, I suppose. One of his main jobs is to keep an eye on Jeff and see how he's doing. I calculate how to prepare the cabin that way, to make sure it's a cozy place for him. I absolutely cannot stress him out. He needs to feel safe and content.

Right now, everyone has been keeping watch on him so it's hard for me to get him. Soon, though, soon. I can feel my opportunity coming, especially with the 'help' of the Corrupted. They're sort of hard to control but I've been working on it. Hopefully there will come a time when mostly everyone at the mansion has gone to deal with them, and then...and then...

I'm so, so close to my end goal! The excitement and eagerness coursing through my veins 24/7 is enough to compete against the mouths' spiteful pain. It's such a surreal thought to eventually have Jeff with me again. I'll be able to hear his voice again, and see him in person, and touch him with my bare hands! So many hugs and smiles to give him that he's missed out on for over a year.

I'll have him soon, and once I do I can be done with the mansion-spying and maybe even the job at Artem's auto-shop. He and Reese are good people, but I've got to move on so I can work on making life better for Jeff and I. Hell, maybe the both of us can go to Canada together, like I had wanted to. It's such a silly idea but it could work.

So close. So close...

I will have him, my love, my light, my happiness. Just you wait, Jeff. We'll have our home.

We'll be together soon̛͔͔̤̗̬ͪ̆̓ͪͧ́̃̋ͤ.͍̱̜͋̌ͫ͊̕

...

Rise and shine, my dear. You don't want to be late for work.

Instead of beautiful, cool moonlight, I was blinded by the lively radiance of the sun through my bedroom window. I squinted my eyes and stretched under my blanket, feeling the soreness from last night. Zalgo stood over me at my bedside, gazing at me expectantly with those crimson eyes.

"What time is it?" I croaked as I sat up.

Eight-thirty-six. Not too late. I suggest you get ready now.

With a sigh, I slid out of bed and shuffled over to the closet in the corner for a new change of clothes. I took this time to examine the mouths. At first, nothing looked disconcerting. Upon closer inspection, I noticed the faint, dark veins stemming out from them. Some were short, while others coiled around my arm. I ran my fingers over them to check if they were just dirt marks, but they remained intact. Shit...

When I exited my room, I found that Caedis' bedroom door was open. Inside, he sat patiently on his bed, legs folded, the ASL textbook right in front of him. I assumed he practiced all night. The Velveteen Rabbit also lay on the floor, just barely beneath his bed. I feel bad now. I forgot to read it to him last night, because of my black out.

My stomach growled once and I heeded its desire for food. I entered the kitchen to grab an apple from the fridge. As I bit down into one, I noticed something orange on the kitchen counter. Strange... A prescription bottle?

"What the hell is this doing here?" I asked aloud as I picked it up.

Zalgo appeared next to me to scrutinize it.

Perhaps your little spy gave you a gift.

Furrowing my brow, I said, "He dropped by the cabin? Was this last night?"

Possibly. I cannot recall. This must have been from him though.

While chowing down on my apple, I studied the prescription label. Inconveniently, it was scratched off where a name would be so I had no clue whose this was. It looked used though. Some pills left.

Fluoxetine. Isn't that that egg dish?

"That's eggs Florentine, you dumbass," I grumbled at the former Lord, "and this is anxiety medication. Is this from the mansion? If so then I can't have him taking more things. Who knows how particular every one else is? Every little detail counts."

Although, while you have it, perhaps it wouldn't be unwise to use it.

"What??"

You've been quite stressed, my darling.

"Ha, when aren't I?" I scoffed dismissively. Yet I found myself contemplating Zalgo's suggestion seriously. He wouldn't be wrong, but neither right.

"I don't have time to think about this," I said as I pushed the bottle aside.

Quickly, while I held the apple in my mouth, I put on my shoes and my eyepatch. At the front door, I finished eating my small breakfast and hollered, "You know the drill, Caedis! I'll be back!"

Have a good day at work, darling.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered at Zalgo before stepping out of the cabin and summoning the black web to take me away from here.

...

Ben's POV

My mind keeps taking me back to those memories. It itches just below the surface of all my thoughts and comes through when I'm at my most vulnerable. My stress doesn't help. I feel so tired but I don't want to rest—don't know how. I'd feel like shit if I relied on weed again. Interacting with Reese through the phone gets me by though, even if it's a text or two. Everyone else seems to be doing fine; Jeff is more active, Ao is acting more motivated than before with Kagekao's admittance, even the pets seem to feel more laid back and playful. Everything's fine everywhere else but in my head, because of those thoughts—those memories. I'm not even safe when I'm conscious; sleep isn't a factor of those strange dreams anymore. They just happen and, lately, at the most inconvenient of times...

I was sitting on the floor with a guitar in my lap, gently picking at the strings as I was learning new music. My throat felt a bit raw, like I had been talking a lot. Above me, on the bed, was that dark-haired, British boy I've come to know as Adam. He was counting the money we had collected today from performing on the streets. The smile on his face told me that we did good this time.

"Damn," he began, "maybe that harmonizing bit we did was worth it...!"

"I told you," I remarked cheekily, bumping his knee with my hand.

"You can't blame me for being skeptical. My voice ain't cut out for singing."

"You did just fine."

"You're just being nice."

"Hopper would agree. Right, girl?" At the mention of her name, the fluffy, burly dog looked up at me from playing with her chew toy. She dipped her head when she snorted, which I took as a nod. Hopper and Ben: 1. Adam: 0.

The British teen gathered up all the money and put it in a metal money box, which he hid in the space between his wall and mattress. Later, he'd turn it in to the bank for a check which he'd give to Justin Ford. We're still a ways away from our goal, but I've been getting better at performing so our chances are increasing.

"And so a day's work comes to an end," Adam sighed as he laid back on his pillows. The room was submerged in quietness as none of us talked and I had stopped plucking the guitar strings to write in my sheet music.

I felt a light tap on my head and Adam remarked, "Take a break, why don't you? You've been at that guitar since I gave it to you."

"I'm getting better. I need to work harder."

Suddenly, he snaked his arms at either side of me to take the guitar from me. I didn't even try to fight. All I did was give him a harmless frown.

Adam sat the guitar on his lap, placed his fingers on the neck, and played an awful chord. I just shook my head while he smiled proudly. A perfectionist urge within me made me grab his fingers to adjust them to an actual chord. When he strummed, it sounded just right.

"How's about you teach me to play?" he questioned playfully.

"Will you practice?" I inquired while I fixed his fingers to play a different chord.

"Probably not."

"Then?"

"It'd be an honor to hear the wise words of Benjamin Gallagher, the great and hard working," he teased.

I chuckled. "So you don't actually want to learn for the sake of learning?"

"Does it matter? Hell, if it works out, we can become a duo. Set off on the road, playing at venues, with nothing but the horizon ahead and our limitations far behind!"

"A life like that tends to be hard. Sometimes unattainable...," I murmured. Why'd I say that? Dad's words slipped out...

"Well, it'd be worth it with you as my partner-in-crime, Benjamin-boyo," the British boy countered positively, leaning his head on the guitar with that childish grin on his face. I smiled, as I always do with Adam and his devilish positivity.

I tried grabbing my guitar again but the British boy had pulled it away before I could. "I meant it when I said to take a break," he said.

"I can't even hold it?"

"No, because you'll start messing with it anyway."

"Just give the guitar back."

"Awww, Ben I'm so bored...! You're just gonna leave sweet ol' me alone with my thoughts? What's up with you?"

I rolled my eyes. "Nothing."

"You're more too yourself than usual, not talking as much," he pointed out. "

"Didn't you think maybe my voice is too tired to talk?" I retorted.

"Fine, then we can play some Majora," he suggested. Carefully, he set the guitar down to the side, laid down on his bed, and snatched up the Majora's Mask game case from his little games rack next to us. In a showy fashion, he waved it in my face and chimed, "C'mon, Ben. It calls to you. You can't resist that sweet, succulent Majora." Then, he proceeded to sniff the box loudly with an expression of absolute bliss and I giggled. He laughed too and flashed that cool smile of his.

"Seriously, what's wrong?" he asked again.

Looking straight into his dark eyes, I repeated, "Nothing. I just want to practice while I can."

"You can't do it at home?"

Hesitantly, I replied, "Not all the time. I have...chores to do sometimes."

"You do too many things, Ben."

"And that's bad why?"

"Because then you're too distracted to pay attention to me," he complained shamelessly, yet I couldn't be mad at him for it.

"Well, there's just stuff that I have to do," I argued gently. "You know how much music means to me, and how important raising money for Justin is. Both of those combined mean I have to work hard."

He pouted his lips. "There are limits to how much you can do."

"I'm not at that limit yet."

With a huff, he reluctantly pulled my guitar forward and muttered, "Alright, fine. Go ahead and keep on practicing."

"Thank you."

"Guess I'll just sit in silence, not talking to you...not telling you about the surprise I had for you..."

I knew him giving up was too easy. Interested, I asked, "What surprise??"

"No, no, you're busy practicing. I can't interrupt you when you're in your zone," he responded glumly as he laid down, his back towards me.

Furrowing my brow, I left my guitar to the side and poked Adam. "Tell me the surprise."

"No, I'm not allowed to talk."

"Adam," I whined, poking him faster. Once I figured that wouldn't work, I got up on the bed and tried nudging him hard. "Adaaaaam. Tell me! What's the surprise? Adam!" He remained silent and fake-sulking.

Just when I thought I couldn't get through to him, a mischievous idea came to mind. Grinning happily, I got off the bed and shuffled to Hopper's spot on the floor. Without warning, I grabbed her chew toy and waved it in the air. Immediately, she got up and began wagging her tail. "You want the chewie, Hopper? Yes? Go get it!"

A rush of faux villainy rushed through me once I tossed the chew toy at Adam's figure on the bed. He turned around with wide eyes and exclaimed, "Wait, no!" but it was too late. The big, fluffy canine leaped joyfully on top of him to fetch her precious toy, but her attention went to licking her owner's face instead.

"No!" he sputtered past Hopper's kisses, "You used my own dog against me! How fiendish...! Agh!"

He pretended to play dead and Hopper stopped licking him, but only for a second, and then she continued anyway.

"Tell me the surprise," I urged again as I jumped onto the bed too.

"Can't speak, I'm dead," he wheezed. In addition, he stuck his tongue out the side of his mouth. Unfortunately, Hopper found it and Adam coughed at tasting dog slobber. Still, his "dead" act continued.

"Adam, c'mon! Ugh, you're such an ass...," I groaned. This time I felt I wouldn't get anything from him at all. If Hopper couldn't make him fess up, then what else is there??

"Perhaps," Adam began quietly, "an apologetic hug might awaken the handsome, sleeping prince from his deathly slumber...?"

I rolled my eyes and stifled a giggle again. "Fine, fine," I surrendered. With no other plan, I leaned down to give Adam a hug. But the sentimental hug never happened, and Adam swiftly yanked me down in his place. He had gotten up now and dangled Hopper's toy above my head. Before I could protest, the burly canine sprawled herself over me for her toy.

"I thought we were a team, Hopper," I groaned melodramatically.

"Good girl! Kisses! Give Ben kisses!" he commanded as he tapped my cheeks. The loyal ball of love listened obediently and I got my share of her sloppy kisses. I tried my best not to let her touch my mouth, meanwhile Adam was having himself a laugh.

"Okay, that's enough, girl," he stated. Hopper gave me one last kiss before shifting off of me and focusing on her chew toy instead. I wiped off all her saliva and was displeased to find some fur in my mouth. Jesus, she sheds...!

"You alright there?" Adam asked me with a smirk.

"No," I spat, literally.

He kept smiling while he helped me clean my face with his jacket sleeve, and I couldn't really be mad. Seeing his smile always cheers me up; it's like magic. I found myself just staring at him, especially since he leaned so close to me. Even the way he brushed his fingers on my face made me feel content.

After he finished touching my face, I took him by surprise when I caught him in a hug. He froze for a second and then chuckled lightheartedly.

"Sorry for being a dick earlier and not giving you attention," I murmured.

Patting my head, he said, "Ah, it's alright. Sorry I was being a dick and begging you for attention."

I chuckled and pet his black locks of hair. Gently, he sunk his face into the crook of my neck more, and the unexpectedness of it made me blush. A few moments passed that he just held himself there and I could feel his soft breathing and lips against my skin. I didn't think he'd take this hug so seriously. We were joking with each other after all.

"So," I started, "um...what was the surprise?"

That got him to let go and he even seemed startled with himself. "Huh? Oh, right, that. Hehe, I almost forgot."

Adam sat up straight, allowing me space to move. With another big smile, he told me, "The surprise is...there's this concert in San Diego next month, just before the holidays. A few hours' drive. I think you'd really love to see it."

"A rock concert?"

"Hell yeah."

"What bands?"

"Oh, you know, a few local artists, underground groups...Guns N' Roses...."

My joy was instantaneous as I sat up faster than I could blink. "No way! Seriously?!"

"Very serious."

"Ahaha! That's—oh my god, that's amazing! You'd really take me? Oh, god, that's...! That's..." My voice trailed off as I began thinking about my father. Would he let me go? All the way to San Diego? I've never even left this city.

"That's great, but I'll have to see if my dad will allow me to go," I went on.

"And if he doesn't let you?"

I pursed my lips, trying not to think about such a prospect right now. "I don't know. I don't go...?"

"I need you to come with, Ben. There's no one else I want to go with but you."

"I know, and I want to go, but I still gotta ask. If my dad says no, then..."

"You're coming no matter what. We'll find a way," he stated determinedly.

"Adam, I can't just—."

"We're in our senior year, Ben. We've gotta do all we can! You can't let your dad ruin that for you. Hell, I'll take the blame for whatever trouble you get into."

"Adam—."

"Guns N' Roses, Ben," he said strongly, leaning towards me. "Just me and you! We've gotta do this. Nothing can stop us. We're a power duo, you and I. I'm not me without you."

A nervous chuckle slipped past my lips. "I'm not that important..."

"You are, among many other great things," the British boy countered. "Do you realize how much fun I have when I'm with you? I thought being in America would be bloody boring and aggravating, but then I found you! In detention of all places. You're my detention buddy! My first friend. I'm lucky that someone like you can even tolerate someone like me."

"You're not bad," I assured him.

"Are you kidding? I'm a fuckin' asshole. I've blackmailed people, Ben. Screwed blokes over since I was twelve. Kids here think I'm cool and all, but inside I'm a damn jerk. You're the only one who truly believes I'm good despite all the shit I do. You don't pretend with me. You're special, Ben. That's why I need you to share every great experience with me. Without you, it wouldn't be the same, if not absolute, utter shit."

At the end of Adam's short speech, I was so awed that I couldn't respond right away. There were a few seconds that I spent just staring into his eyes, seeing every last bit of sincerity gleam in those dark, brown eyes. His hands were placed at either side of me, his fingers tightly clutched onto the duvet underneath us. The only thing that set off this mood was Hopper squeaking her chew toy.

Finally, I gulped and said, "You've made your point, but I still have to ask. If that fails...then we figure something out together."

A smile formed on Adam's rosy lips and he snatched me into another hug, seemingly burying his face deeper into my neck than earlier. "I already can't wait," he murmured excitedly.

"Me too," I chirped nervously. I couldn't help but worry about the talk I'd have with my dad. Hopefully, he'll be in one of his decent moods today. Please, let him give me permission. I don't care how much I need to clean, cook or do other chores around the house to keep him happy from then on, I'll do it all, anything, everything to have this concert with Adam.

"Hey," the British boy piped up as he let go of me. "Why don't we actually play some Majora, yeah?"

I nodded eagerly, completely forgetting about practicing my guitar despite my adamancy about it earlier. There are other opportunities for that, even if I have to make them. For now, I want to enjoy my time with Adam and give him all the attention he wants.

Later, when he dropped me off at home, I caught Dad at a good time. Well, he had still given me a disgruntled look but it was better than nothing or something worse.

Wash his car every week, mow the lawn, clean around the house more, those are my additional responsibilities to make up for going to the concert.

He let me go.

I'm gonna go to my first Guns N' Roses concert—my first ever concert—with Adam! I'm gonna go!

Yes, yes—!

"BEN! LOOK OUT!"

Ao's shrill, panicked voice called out to me. By the time I had snapped out of my senses, one of the last Corrupted had charged into me. Horns pierced through my stomach and my entire body rattled once my back had hit a tree trunk. I cried out in pain but was too disoriented to immediately teleport out of my predicament.

A bright wave of violet light was shot at the snarling Corrupted that pinned me, and its entire torso was sliced in half. Its cries of agony hurt my ears but were cut off as soon as they had started once its heart, surrounded in a blue aura, was unmercifully ripped from its upper body. With one tight clench of Ao's hand, the heart was crushed with her magic and the horned Corrupted screeched its death.

As it eroded to ashes, I fell from my place against the tree. My wounds began to heal now that they were free but my whole body still hurt. My throbbing headache didn't help either. Groaning, I curled up on the ground waiting for the pain to go away.

Ao jogged up to me, asking, "Ben, what happened? You just froze up all of a sudden. I called you for five minutes."

"I'm sorry," I said, then winced when I found it hurt to talk.

The brunette crouched down and placed a hand on my head. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted her blue, Purification magic glowing, and then I felt its calming effects wash over me like warm water. My wounds had healed by now. Everything was starting to feel better.

"S-Sorry I left you to deal with the Corrupted on your own," I mumbled.

"It's fine. I'm just glad they showed up in a woodlands and not in a city again. Those poor kids at that one school probably won't have a playground for a while, haha..."

I tried to laugh along with her, but I didn't have it in me.

"You've been doing this a lot," she commented.

"Doing what?"

"Freezing up. You end up in some sort of trance and no one can snap you out of it until you wake up on your own."

"I'm sorry..."

"There's no need to apologize. However, I do wanna ask if there's something wrong. What's making you freeze?"

"It's nothing..."

I could just sense the frown on Ao's face without looking at her.

"Ms. P has told me you've once been frozen for almost thirty minutes. This time was fortunately only five minutes. I need to know what's wrong so I can help; I can't have this happening to you again."

After staring at the dirt and grass, I finally lifted my head to face her. Her emerald eyes shined with so much concern, they were glowing (or could that be her magic?). She looked so much older staring at me like that. It feels like she could be over 20 but she's barely 17.

"Okay," I huffed, "I'll explain when we get back to the mansion, but...let me rest and get my bearings for a while. If you need to go back already, you can do that."

"No," she protested. "I'll stay here with you."

Bearing a gentle smile, Ao sat herself next to me and the both of us leaned against the tree I had been impaled against just a few minutes ago. I couldn't help but lean my head against her shoulder and let the forest ambiance immerse me. She rested her head on mine and patted my leg to comfort me. I felt the tired smile on my face and murmured, "Thanks, Sheba."

She chuckled hearing that nickname. "No problem, Casanova."

From then on, the both of us sat in silence while the forest and all its little creatures continued thriving as it normally would. Every chirp, chitter, rustle and whistle sounded rich with life and made me feel more at ease. I refused to think about my daydream, or much of anything, right now. It was just me, Sheba, and nature. After everything, this little piece of tranquility feels perfect.

...

Reese's POV

Colors of red, blue, pink, and green danced across my vision, making the grand room more enchanting than it was. If you take away the pretty lights and the music, concerts are hot, stuffy, loud gatherings of sweaty, surging bodies. But you don't pay attention to that because everything looks like a dreamworld and the pulse of the music hypnotizes your heart, like its becoming one with you, infusing into your being.

Although I was fascinated by the concert, my focus always landed on the body beside me. He held my hand securely, our fingers intertwined. His shoulder always bumped against me when he would jump or squirm with joy for the music, for the beat that we shared. And there was the golden moments where I would dare to look at him, and he would be looking back, and I would risk sending my heart and thoughts into a frenzy of so many emotions. We were in public, but his eyes shined a beautiful, bright red anyway, and his pointed ears perked with delight. The multicolored lights played in his eyes, making them glitter more than usual, a trancing show in the iris.

We didn't talk much, mostly because we could barely hear each other over the music and the joyous cries of the people around us. We communicated with our eyes and with our bodies, often times playfully bumping into each other or tugging on the other to start dancing. At one point, the crowd began to push against us towards the stage, eager for the performing artists currently on. I had to hold onto my starry-eyed, elfin wraith to keep him in place. It didn't matter to us how close we were to the stage, so long as we could savor the music and atmosphere.

Seconds went on and it felt like everyone had moved up further than they should've. Our surroundings were more open, less stuffy, seemingly more private despite the spaciousness. When I tried to pull my wraith toward the crowd, knowing how much he wanted to see the concert, he didn't budge. Confused, I turned and looked into his eyes again for his wordless response. Slowly, he grabbed my other hand with soft, nimble fingers and came closer. His skin felt cool yet mine felt extremely hot. I grew self-conscious and tried to pull away from him so he wouldn't be bothered.

Retaliating my move, he tugged onto my shirt and pulled me back. And he kept pulling me and pulling me and pulling me, until he turned us around and my back hit a wall. His hands brushed against my neck and sent sweet tingles through my scalp. With a devious smirk, he pulled me down to bite my ear and was unrelenting. Pain made my skin burn up even more, but it felt good because it was him giving it to me. I closed my eyes and grabbed his slim waist, pulling him right up against me.

His teeth released my ear and brushed against my jaw as he pulled his head back. Firm hands gripped my hair and forced me to look down into his eyes. They burned bright like a gorgeous flame and deep down I knew I would gladly let it consume me. Every last bit of me can be his. His eyes can fill me up with their heat and burning love. Every bit of me; all of me is intertwined with him in those beautiful flames.

Contrasting to the thrilling heat I felt, my wraith's eyes seemed to cool and only shine with love and compassion. He pressed his forehead against mine and whispered something so close to my lips I could feel his breath. I couldn't hear what it was over the sound of my beating heart in my ears, but I sensed it was something endearing.

My chest was thrumming with nervousness as I closed my eyes and leaned forward to close that damned gap between our lips. When I expected to feel the overwhelming warmth of his lips, there was nothing. I opened my eyes only to see his mischievous, smirking face.
Desperately, I pressed my head against his and heard myself groan, "Don't tease me."

All he did was stick his tongue out and gently push my face away.

I felt myself frown. "So mean."

I saw his mouth move but I still couldn't hear him.

"What are you trying to tell me?"

Tenderly, he caressed my face and leaned his forehead dangerously against mine again. My heart was practically trying to escape the confines of my chest. I closed my eyes to relish in his presence and said, "You know how badly I want this. Please, let me...just once..."

This time, when he pressed his lips against the side of my face and murmured something, I was able to decipher it. 'Make you wait for it.'

"I'll wait as long as you want me to," I said longingly, needfully. "You have me. Only you."

Again, I tried to close the gap to finish this unbearable turmoil, but he slipped away from me for what felt like the hundredth time. His lighthearted chuckle warmed my heart yet I felt mocked at the same time. How can such a gorgeous sound be so dangerous? I feel like I'm going to combust. So mean.

The music resonating around us began to increase in volume, and so did my heart beat, and so did that addicting laugh. I felt like I was burning up more than ever before, and I wanted to pull away from the cool touch of the beautiful man before me. I think...I'm actually going to combust into flames. It's so hot. The music is too loud. His laugh is suffocating me but I want more, and more, and more. Can't let him touch me. Can't let him get hurt. Hot. Hot. Too hot..!

...

I woke up to the unpleasant sensation of being extremely sweaty while my blanket was tangled around my body. For a moment I thrashed, but when that didn't work I carefully slipped out of my cotton cocoon. Panting, I sat on the edge of my bed and absentmindedly stared at the floor. My thoughts were galloping, unsure of where to go—what to think of.

I had a very...interesting...dream about Ben. I'm not even going to pretend I didn't know what it meant. My mind finally had enough of shoving thoughts of that at the back of my head.

But he's my friend. I can't...

My chest felt tight at the notion of considering him a friend, or never letting what happened in my dream come true. That means something. All of this. I can't anymore. I fuckin' can't...!

But before I decide to ruin my mental stability with thoughts of Ben, I need food.

And I need Hunter.

...

While I sat at the kitchen table enjoying a bowl of cereal, Hunter came out of his room looking disheveled from sleep. He went straight for the fridge to get orange juice and slurred, "Mornin', Reese's puffs."

"Morning," I murmured and silently watched him get his breakfast.

In the middle of toasting his waffles in the toaster, he turned around and asked, "Why are you staring at me?"

"Ah, no reason," I replied awkwardly. I stuffed a big bite of cereal into my mouth to avoid having to say something else right away. Hunter narrowed his dark eyes at me before taking a long sip of his OJ.

Once he had his waffles and juice and was seated across from me, I mustered up my courage and asked, "Hunter, can I ask you something important..?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "What is it?"

"It's, uh...personal, but I need your complete honesty. I don't want you to...make fun of me."

Hunter stared intently into my eyes, and I would feel intimidated if not for his extreme case of bedhead that made him look silly. Suddenly, he gasped and reached across the table for my hand. "Oh my god, Reese...!"

"Wh-What??"

He put a hand to his mouth. "Did you finally become a furry?"

I grimaced out of confusion and surprise. "Excuse me?"

He blinked. "Did you not?"

"No! Why'd you assume a furry? And finally??"

"Look, I don't know what you're into."

I stared at him for a bit before scowling and adding, "Is that why furry related stuff shows up on my Google account?"

"What?"

"Were you trying to make me a furry?!"

"Listen, let's move on to the real discussion at hand."

"You fuckin' asshole...!"

"I never said I was a saint—look, let's get on with this important, personal question of yours!"

After shaking my head in disappointment at him, I leaned back in my chair, crossed my arms, and took a deep breath. "It's...about Ben."

Immediately, his lips curled into a smirk and he nodded. "Alright..."

"Don't look at me like that."

"I'm not doing anything.~"

"Hunter...!"

"You wanted me to be honest."

"You're honestly an asshole."

"Okay, okay, just tell me what it is. I'll stop being a jerk."

I spared a moment to eye him with suspicion before continuing. "Okay, so...I'm not sure how to describe this. Ben's my friend, right, and he's an amazing person."

"Mhmm."

"Often times we get...really close, and...I mean, I didn't think anything of it at first but ever since the indie concert I've been...having these thoughts."

Hunter was in the middle of drinking his orange juice when he choked, coughed, slammed down his glass, and blurted, "Do you have wet dreams??!"

"What? No!" —I thought about it for a moment— "Well.."

"Oh my god! You do!"

"No! It doesn't really count since I didn't, ya know, but it was a little—."

"AHAHAHAHA!!"

"HUNTER!"

A couple of minutes passed that I spent enduring Hunter's hysterical laughter. He slapped the table, covered his face, took breathers only to burst out laughing all over again like an idiot. I sat in silence, feeling done with everything.

Finally, Hunter ceased his cackling and wiped at his eyes. "Ahh, aahhhh, hehe, that was a good laugh. Alright, so, where were we?"

"I think I'm gonna go back to bed."

"No, no, no, stay," he pleaded with a smile, tugging on my arm when I tried to leave the table. "What are you trying to tell me, my man?" he questioned.

Crossing my arms again, I looked down (found it easier to talk that way) and went on, "Basically...I think I'm..."

"Gay."

"No, I was gonna say into Ben!"

".......Gay."

"Hunter, can you please??"

"Sorry, sorry."

I covered my face and muttered into my palms, "I shouldn't have talked to you."

"Okay, look, I'll stop being weird," he said. "Is there anything more you want to share with me?"

After muddling over it, I admitted, "I've tried to tell him but...it's hard. I get choked up. I feel choked up just thinking about him. I...I don't want to fuck something up. Not like the other times."

"First of all," he began, leaning forward, his bitch face on, "those girls you dated before were hoes. Especially that Miranda-bitch."

"Yeah, she is a bitch."

"They weren't right for you. And you were younger, less mature, less experienced. You didn't know what you were doing. You were flying on the seat of your pants, and those girls let you crash and burn. Personally, I don't think Ben would do that. He's a cool guy. I really like him. I trust him with you, and I don't say that about just anyone. You're my only brother, and my best friend, and there's no one else who I think would cherish you as much as Ben would."

"But what if I—."

"Yah! Cállate with the 'what if'," he chided (oh shit, he pulled out the Spanish). "You're not gonna fuck something up. I guarantee that if shit doesn't work out, Ben would be the type of guy to still care about you. But I have faith that things can work out. Sometimes I see this light in his eyes when he looks at you, and how he carries himself when he's around you. I didn't start teasing you about being with him because of whatever you did. I teased you about that stuff because of him."

Easing up, I twisted my lips and mumbled, "Really?"

"Yeah, dude. I'm surprised you never noticed."

"Well—."

"You're fuckin' blind, my dude."

"Okay, I get it," I grumbled.

He smiled at me again and said, "Reese, you never know things will work out until you try and see for yourself. I say talk to Ben, confess your feelings in their entirety. Go for it. It's your last year, buddy. Stick with him while you can before high school ends."

For a second I was confused as to what he meant, until I remembered that Ben is a "student at my high school". Regardless if he's a student or a ghost boy who'd be with me even after I graduate, I should listen to Hunter and take my chance now. But how can I do it? I shouldn't admit everything to him straight up. I mean, I should, but it would be jarring for him, without warning. Maybe...maybe I should take him on a date. The prom. The prom! It's...oh my god, it's two weeks from now. It's in two weeks and I haven't even seen Ben yet. Shit! Aahh!

"Shit, Hunter! Prom!"

"Prom??"

"Prom!"

"P-Prom!!?"

"Prom!"

"PROM!"

"PROM!!!"

"Why are we screaming prom?!" he exclaimed.

Like a bolt of lightning, I grabbed him by the shirt and blurted, "It's in two weeks already! That's when I tell him!"

"For real?"

"Yes! And-And, maybe I could do something else for him. Is dinner too cheesy?!"

"You're very loud."

"I'm very nervous..!"

Playing a nonchalant grin, he patted my shoulder and chimed, "Buddy, relax! You can't stress out before anything's even happened. How about you take a chill pill and let the wise words of Hunter 'el guapo' Montemayor talk you away into romance land?"

"Your middle name definitely isn't and shouldn't be el guapo."

"Just roll with it, Reese 'el grosero' Montemayor," he muttered.

Hunter finished up whatever was left of his waffles—and by that, I mean he practically stuffed everything in his mouth—before getting up to put his dishes away and open the cupboard adjacent to the sink. Without looking, he tossed me my Zoloft and reached in for something else, probably his own medicine. As I took my medicine, I watched him curiously search through the whole cupboard.

"That's funny," he started, "my medicine's not here."

"Is it in your school bag?" I questioned.

"No, I don't take it with me. Maybe...Mom misplaced it? But... I don't know, man. Damn, and it had plenty pills left in it, too."

"Wanna try getting another prescription?"

He sighed and casually closed the cupboard. "Nah, not today."

"But you need it..."

"What's one day without a dose gonna do to me? I'm off today anyway. Nothin' to make me nervous."

Although I was perturbed by his nonchalance over his anxiety medication, I didn't carry on with the subject. It's not like he's a nervous wreck without them. Still, it might take a while to get a refill.

"Call your doctor anyway," I advised.

"Alright, buddy," he relented. Ruffling my hair he said, "Hey, set up the TV. I wanna play some games with you on my free day. Plus, we can discuss your Benny-Boo while we're at it."

"Don't call him tha... Ugh, fine."

There's just no winning with Hunter and his mischievous tendencies. That doesn't mean there's no winning with him when it comes to video games. I'm totally dragging that nerd in GangBeasts; just you wait, Hunter!