You've Never Had Chocolate Like This (Hoverchocs)

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As dawn breaks over the glittering dome of the Galeries Gourmet, Willy wakes up to start his big day. He hums a little tune to himself as he walks down the stairs, excited to begin.

On the stroke of ten, uniformed doormen open the gates.

Willy makes his way past affluent shoppers to the centre.

He takes out an old bar of chocolate with his last name on it, slowly running his thumb over it, longingly.

"Here we go, Mamma." Willy said, quietly to himself, then he takes a deep breath and stands his cane on the ground, where it magically stays upright.

He leaps on top of his suitcase and presses a button, causing an arm flips out from the side and a tiny flag embroidered with W unfurls unimpressively.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE GALERIES GOURMET! My name is Willy Wonka, and I have come to show you a marvellous morsel, an incredible edible, an uuuun-beatable eaaaaat-able the likes of which this world has never seen, so quieten up and listen down." Willy said, pointing towards the ground then realizes his mistake.

"No. Scratch that, reverse it." He said, waving his finger in the air.

"I give you the Hoverchoc." He said, holding up a strange looking piece of chocolate.

Webs and piranha who happens to be passing with a laundry cart, stops to watch when they hear Willy blow a little tooter to get a note.

He then starts to play his one-manband and begins singing.

"In... a... jungle near Mumbai
There's a little hover-fly
Whose wings go at a thousand flaps a sec
And that's no lie!
These microscopic fleas
Like chocolate more than leaves
And when asked nicely lay precisely
One little egg in each of these!"

As Willy sings, a small crowd starts to form and he pulls out a full jar of Hoverchoc out of his hat.

Attracted by the disturbance, three sinister men come to the windows of the offices above their respective chocolate shops.

"When it hatches from its shell
It gives a happy yell!"

"Whoo-hoo!"

How thrilling to be living in A chocolate hotel!
It beats its wings with glee And then as you will see The chocolate will levitate
And float most gracefully..."

He opens the lid, and the chocolate quite impossibly rise up from the jar until they hang in mid-air.

The crowd gasp and the three Chocolatiers are visibly pale.

"Well there's chocolate And there's chocolate!
But only Wonka's make your eyes
Pop out their socke-let's!
Put your hand into your pocke-let!
Get yourself some Wonka chocolate!
Come now I insist
You've never had chocolate like this!
No, you've never had chocolate like this!

Piranha, webs and the crowd burst into enthusiastic applause as the Hoverchoc return to the jar.

"Miss Bon-bon?" Slugworth, one of the chocolatiers said to his secretary.

"Yes, Mr Slugworth?" She asked.

"Call the police." He instructed.

"Very good, sir." Bon-bon said and Slugworth turns to leave.

"Well, who wants to try one?" Willy asked the crowd.

"I will." Slugworth replied as he, Fickelgruber, and Prodnose emerge from their respective stores and push through the crowd.

"Mr Slugworth, sir! Mr Fickelgruber! And Mr Prodnose! What an honour! Ever since I was a little boooooy..." Willy said, but was interrupted by Slugworth clasping his hand in a bone-crushing handshake.

"That is quite a handshake!" Willy exclaimed.

"It's a business handshake, Mr. Wonka. Lets people know, I mean business. Now come along, let's try one of these so-called Hoverchocs." Slugworth said.

Slugworth, Fickelgruber, and Prodnose each pluck a chocolate out of the jar and as they pop them in their mouths, they struggle to hide their exquisite pleasure.

"Ooh! It's not just chocolate, is it? There's.... marshmallow." Slugworth said.

"Harvested from the mallow-marshes of Peru." Willy explains, smiling.

"And caramel. But... but it's..." Flickelgruber said.

"Salted. With the bittersweet tears of a Russian clown." Willy revealed.

"And is that... Surely not! Cherry?" Prodnose asked, amazed.

"Cherry-picked by the pick of the cherry-pickers from the Imperial Gardens in Japan." Willy said, proudly.

"Well, Mr. Wonka, I've been in this business a very long time, and I can safely say, that of all the chocolate l've ever tasted, this is without doubt, the absolute one hundred percent... worst." Slugworth said.

"WHOO! THERE WE HAVE IT, Ladies and Gentlemen! An endorsement from Mr Slugworth himself..." Willy said, excitedly until he realizes what Slugworth had just said. "Wait! The worst?!" He asked, turning back to him.

"We three are the fiercest of rivals and yet we agree on one thing. A good chocolate should be simple, plain, uncomplicated." Slugworth told him.

"Whereas this, with all its bells and whistles, well, it's just..." Fickelgruber said, searching for the correct word to describe Willy's chocolate.

"Weird." Prodnose finishes for him.

Willy suddenly seems totally crushed. "That's shame. If you thought the chocolate was weird, you're going to hate what happens next." He said, with a mischievous glint in his eye.

At that very moment, Slugworth starts to rise up into the air, followed shortly by Fickelgruber and Prodnose and the crowd gasps.

"What's happening? Whoa, what's going on?!" Slugworth asked, frighten.

"That's the hoverfly! It's broken out of it's cocoon and is flapping its wings like billy-o!" Willy replied.

Prodnose flips over backwards sending his wig falling to the ground, which Willy picks it up and throws it back to him.

"You mean a fly's doing this?!" Fickelgruber asked, horrified.

"Yes but don't worry, it'll be completely unharmed! In about twenty minutes, it'll get tired and exit through your rear!" Willy revealed.

"YOU WHAT?!" Fickelgruber exclaimed.

"He means we're going to fart them out of our botties!" Prodnose whimpered.

'Yes, I know what he meant!" Fickelgruber shouted.

Piranha and webs giggled trying to hold their laughter.

"You're off your rocker, Wonka! Who in their right mind would want a chocolate that makes you fly?!" Slugworth asked, angrily.

"Let's find out, shall we? Who's for a Hoverchoc?!" Willy asked, opening the jar and the Hoverchoc fly out as the crowd starts clamouring for chocolates and drop coins in his jar.

Willy smiles happily as one by one, people start rising upward. Piranha laugh, amazed by the magical sight in front of them.

Willy spins, relishing the crowd's joy, then tips his hat to everyone, then he spots webs crawling over to him, she was a little nervous about him.

Then he hands her the last of his chocolate, she was startled when he got close and back up a bit.

"It's ok, take it" he assured her and she didn't even have to pay.

So she quickly takes it and starts eating it slowly, savoring it, wonka smiled as he pets her softly.

But then suddenly from out of nowhere, a police whistles blows.

Piranha panicked, he ran and grabbed webs hiding her in the laundry.

Willy looks around as officers descend from all directions, led by the Chief of police.

"'Beat it, kid." He said to piranha.

They both shoots Willy an apologetic look, suspecting things are about to take a turn for the worse.

"Alright, folks! Nothing to see here! Just a small group of people defying the laws of gravity. Hook 'em, boys." Chief instructed.

"That's the Hoverchoc, sir. That's the point." Willy said as the crowd disperse and the officers pull still-floating customers out of the air like helium balloons.

One of the policemen approaches Willy. "I'm afraid we've had complaints about you, sir." Officer Affable said.

"Complaints?" Willy repeated, confused. "That you've been disrupting the trade of other businesses. I'm regrettably obliged to move you on and confiscate your earnings." Officer Affable replied.

At that moment, Chief takes Willy's earnings. "Hey! What are you doing?" Willy exclaimed, reaching out for the jar.

"Don't worry, it's going to a good cause. Sick kids or something." Chief said, in an uncaring tone.

"Sorry, Sir. Rules is rules." Officer Affable told Willy.

"Could you at least leave me a sovereign? I need to pay for my room." Willy said, with puppy dog eyes.

Affable checks nobody is watching and gives him a sovereign.

"Here." He said and Willy smiles brightens up a bit.

"Thank you."

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