Author - dollylisha2002

Book - It Was Always You

Reviewer - polymath_land

Review

Title-

The title is good and quite apt to the plot, looks quite appealing to readers.

Neither too long nor too short, just perfect title for the story.

Cover-

The cover is good, but I suggest you, change it, pictures are good but not the effect. It's better to change the effect.

Otherwise, a good job at it!

Blurb-

The blurb was quite attractive and perfect, just enough to make me read further. Just some mistakes in grammar, edit the mistakes asap. Otherwise, a good job at it!

And, it is not needed to write "This isn't your ordinary story", even if you write, write it under personal blurb.

According to me, there is no need for that sentence, because it may reveal what your story is about.

Nothing of that sort should get revealed in the blurb. Readers may get an idea of what the content can be, hope you'd have a look at that!

Plot-

Before coming to the plot, you've published a chapter informing about suicide.

" Say no to suicide. It is neither your option nor a choice.", this particular line should be avoided. It is the moral of the story, what is the use if you reveal the moral even before starting the story?

I suggest you, avoid this, readers may lose interest, and reasons can be various.

Story and moral should keep the suspense intact, it should get revealed gradually.

Coming to the plot,

It is a sad story, not a new plot though.

But, what lead him(Sanskar) to suicide can definitely make someone read more.

Swara and Sanskar fell in love with each other, but unsure of each other feelings. The way Sanskar proposed her is beautiful. Their high school love, their friendship and relationship between Laksh, Sanskar and Kavitha is bliss.

'Money' and 'Status' didn't let Sanskar and Swara marry each other. Swara's parents being a status hypocrite, beating up Sanskar and hurting their own daughter in the process is something more than the hypocrisy Shame on them!

I don't want to talk about such hypocrites!!

Sanskar, being a sensitive middle-class man is
under depression, and it's not all surprising for me to find him having thoughts of suicide, after all, he is under depression!

But, Swara managed to make him live his life without any effect of insecurity and sadness.

Their college and married life was something which can be cherished.
Their life as a middle-class couple, walking on the road having no means of transport yet enough happy to cherish it for a lifetime! It was something that touched my heart. His struggle, his promise to Swara of a beautiful life, everything is bliss.

But, after Sanskar becoming a businessman, he was lost somewhere to earn and earn more. And he didn't even have a hint about it.

In this process, he doesn't know what he's doing with his wife. After what was done, he's realising it and can do nothing but regret!

Like, he gave more importance to the meeting than his wife, but as soon as he realised it, he was late. Yet, he went to her, in the process, lost his child.

It wasn't intentional, yet he is guilty that his carelessness is the reason behind his child's death.

Adding to it, the guiltiness of slapping her increased his vulnerability more.

I didn't think that Sanskar could be the cause behind the accident. It was definitely come as a shock. No doubt, he's depressed more. After all, he is the reason behind his child death.

He was stuck between his personal life and professional life. In order to provide his wife with everything, he didn't know when he started being negligent towards his wife, and when he realised, all he could do is regret and blame himself which lead him to suicide.

Instead of suicide, he should have faced everything, even if it will hurt them. They could have been a happy couple, now.

It's not that everyone is perfect, and so is Sanskar. He shouldn't act like a coward, but he did!

Swara trying to commit suicide is not surprising, but at last, she got a reason to live.

Every emotion is etched beautifully that it touched my heart.

Be it swara's, be it Laksh's or the conversation between them in their high school.

Ragini's care and Kavitha's care is supportive.

What I didn't like is Swara's parents accusing Sanskar's mother. I just want to kill them.

Sujatha is the one who lost her son, she can easily accuse them of her son's death. But, she didn't!

Swara's response to her parents is justified.

I loved how you portrayed that Sanskar is back to life just because of Swara. Yet, he lost his life because of the same Swara to save her from himself. It looked like Ashiqui -2.

I don't have anything to say more. It was not a rare one yet you made it beautiful.

I can agree with the title ' It was always you'.

Character development -

It's definitely good.
When the story flow is in the right path, character development will be good, definitely.

- Relationship between Sanskar and Swara.

- The friendship between Kavitha, Laksh, Sanskar and Swara.

- Swara's reaction and her actions after Sanskar's death.

These are justified.

But, you could have worked more on their emotions, it would be perfect.

I have a single drop of tear pooled up in my eye reading the book. Basically, I'm a hardcore woman. It has been four years that I've cried last time. You managed to let a drop out of my eye. But, you should work on emotions such that I'd cry and cry and cry, and end up with hiccups.

You can make it more emotional.

This was my respective view. But, if it did made others cry, you don't have to change.

Narration-

Your narration is good. Since you made it in characters pov, it's definitely Okay.

But, it is good to maintain a single character pov throughout the story, especially in a sad story.

Hope you'd have a look at that!

Grammatical errors-

This is where the story needs re-edit. You have missed using the correct format. Punctuations are quite off here and there. Sentence formation is good but needs proofread.

You have to sit down and proofread it for sure.

But, there are some words that are quite off, like when Sanskar's body reached home, Swara's feeling that she couldn't see his handsome face. It is not the correct word. It's not a happy moment but it is a moment of agony.

Instead of handsome, you could have been used full-of-life/ bright countenance.

Other than that, it is good.

Conclusion -

Positive points-

1) Blurb
2) Title
3) Character development.
4) Narration

Negative points-

1) Grammatical errors (a very less but important one)
2) Cover
3) Plot

I won't suggest this type of plot, it may leave a negative impact on the people.
But, if you can show the sufferings of Swara along with her child, it would be nice to read. At least, we can know how can someone live without a husband and father. What effect may it leave on the child? Etc..

Note:

You may find me rude, but it is for your betterment. I hope this review helps you and I'll be glad if it does.

All the best for your future works.

Payments:
• Permanent follow
• Mention in your book

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