You weren't sure if you could take it anymore.

You could clearly see Rin and the girl, who you soon learned was his girlfriend, sitting at the center fountain, eating lunch together from your dorm window.

When Rin held a bite of his boxed lunch up to her with his chopsticks, you quickly pulled the curtains closed.

Watching them was unbearable. You couldn't help but think that it should've been you getting fed his homemade lunch, not her.

By this time, it had been yet another week and a half since you had been to the cram school. You knew you were on the verge of getting expelled, as other students that wanted to attend for the classes were getting turned away because you held their spot.

Your mind seemed clouded by meaningless thoughts and worries, but you knew that if you didn't say something to Rin soon, you wouldn't be able to look at yourself ever again.

You could hear the bell signaling the end of lunch from your dorm room, and you by then had memorized the routine Rin had with the girl to say goodbye.

He'd give her a kiss to the cheek that'd make her smile. He'd whisper a soft, "goodbye," in her ear to make her shiver before pulling away, letting her smaller fingers slip through his own as she left to her next class.

While she was away, he'd wander the halls, waiting for her class to be over so he could take her hand and walk her to the next.

It sickened you, because you knew that he would never walk you to your next class and treat you like the princess his girlfriend was.

You grabbed your bag when you saw him head in the direction of the girls' dorms as he always did. You raced down the steps, skipping two at a time as you went.

You stopped to catch your breath at the top of the last flight. You could see all the way down to the floor, and then, there he was.

You felt your heart beat faster, anxiety getting the better of you.

It wasn't long before he was out of your line of sight.

Desperate to talk to him, you took a step forward. Your foot missed the step and your breath hitched as you came falling to the floor.

Your mouth was open, but no sound came out as you braced yourself for the landing you would inevitably fail. You held your arms out in front of you to catch yourself.

You couldn't remember much of what happened after that, except the snap of your right arm echoed through your mind as you hit the floor.

You felt tears burn in the back of your eyes as you lay there, watching Rin's back get smaller and smaller as he walked away.

When the pain became too great, you felt as though your arm was on fire, burning your consciousness away.

The room seemed to spin, round and round as a headache resonated in your skull, just before everything went black.

There was a gap in your memory where what followed after occurred, but you didn't mind.

You woke to the too-bright lights of the hospital above your head, your limbs feeling as though they were lead, too heavy to move.

You let your eyes drift down to the cast around your arm as it lay on your stomach.

"It really is broken," you sighed, letting your head drop back on the pillow, your eyes fluttering closed.

The hospital room you were in was dead quiet, not even the ushering of nurses and doctors outside the door able to break the silence.

There was no one there to visit you, not even the friend you missed more than you thought possible.

The image of Rin's back to you as he walked away again flashed through your mind like a lightning bolt.

You'd rather get struck by a real one. It wouldn't hurt as much.

Your eyes only opened when you found it hard to sleep. You used your good arm to push yourself up into a sitting position, not looking forward to more of the tasteless mush the hospital served as "food".

Your gaze scanned the room, which was as empty as you had predicted.

You prayed your time in the hospital would pass quickly, and it did. You were out not long after, but your cast remained.

The whole thing could've been a dream, had you no longer been forced to have a cast.

You wandered the halls, mind unusually calm, different from the normal surging waves of thoughts that seemed to crash against the beaches of your memory.

You kept your head down, watching the heels of your shoes scuff against the floor as you walked.

For once, you wished you had something to think about; something to break the quiet you felt as though you were drowning in.

Your eyes scanned your cast, wishing you had "get well soon" notes to read from your friends for what should've been the hundredth time.

But your only friend was gone, and the one you loved with all your heart forgot you even existed.

You dragged your feet as you leaned tiredly against the walls, guiding yourself up the stairs at the slowest pace you could muster.

You let yourself fumble with your key in your pocket before pushing it into the lock.

You turned it until you heard the familiar click, pushing your door open.

Everything was exactly how you left it; the curtains closed, bed unmade, a few instant ramen cups scattered on your desk from eating in your room to avoid any accidental encounters with Rin.

You picked up a book with your better hand, pushing the door closed behind you with your foot. You dropped your bag on the floor beside your bed before allowing yourself to collapse on the comforter that smelled faintly of coffee and cinnamon.

You flipped the book open to a random page, the paper crinkling under your fingers, and read the words that had been inked on it in black, Arial font.

"'I don't love him,' she whispered, but she knew she was only lying to herself. She loved him more than she had ever loved another person, and the sense of rejection was unbearable."

You slammed the book closed and threw it across the room. You heard it hit the wall, and turned away from it as it lay on its open pages.

You stared at the ceiling like you were looking for the answer to your existence among the microscopic bumps in the paint.

You heard Rin's voice from the courtyard, and couldn't help but get to your feet and make your way to the window.

You peeked through the curtains, your eyes immediately landing on him.

The days you spent in the hospital were long without being able to see him.

You leaned on the windowsill and stared at Rin helplessly, mind turning back to the time you tried to jump.

You felt your heart sink when you remembered what unfolded later that day.

The day he saved your life, was the same day he ended it.

You knelt before the window, propping your head up on your good hand.

"Rin," you whispered his name like it would enchant him, getting him to fall in love with you like he was three months ago.

You let yourself turn away from him, unable to look as Rin laughed and smiled with the beautiful girl that could call him hers.

It wasn't fair, you felt. He could live without you, but you couldn't even last a day without gazing at him like he was the only thing keeping you alive.

You got up just as the couple said their predictable goodbyes, and made your way to the hallway with your bag slung over your shoulder.

You closed the door to your dorm behind you before walking down the stairs.

Rin rounded the corner just as you had, but didn't seem to notice you.

When you got to the bottom, his back was to you, and you couldn't help but notice how broad his back was, just as you had the day you met him.

You hesitantly reached for his hand, but retreated, letting your head bow down as your shoulders shook.

"It's not fair," you whispered, and he didn't turn. He hadn't heard you speak, and you knew it.

Despite that, you felt tears sting your eyes and you tried to fight them back.

You didn't want to cry anymore. You promised yourself you wouldn't.

"It's not fair," you repeated, a bit louder. Again, he failed to hear you, getting further and further away with each passing moment.

If he had heard you, he was ignoring you. You didn't know if you could take that.

"Rin," you called softly, voice trembling with each syllable as his name rolled off your tongue like it was meant to be said by you, and you alone.

You clenched your fists, nails digging into your palms.

You reminded yourself of everything you had been through; the anxiety, the fire, the new girl, the loss, the pain, the anger.

It was all new. It was everything your parents had wanted for you; you to experience the pains and joys of life, because you weren't getting any of it at home.

Sure, there wasn't a lot of joy, and everything seemed so pointless, but as Rin's back seemed to disappear out of your view, your heart sank.

"Please," you begged, shaking as you pleaded with someone who wasn't even there anymore, "please don't go. Not yet, Rin. Please."

Your eyes fell closed, but you weren't sleeping, nor were you crying.

When you opened them, you ran.

You loved the way your footsteps sounded as you ran down the hallway, chasing after the boy you weren't ready to give up just yet.

You ran until he came back into your view, and you didn't stop.

You saw his back, dressed in the school uniform, drawing closer and closer. You held your hand out, reaching for him.

He slipped through your fingertips once before, but this time, you didn't plan on letting go.

"Rin!" You called, a desperate yet pleading cry that begged him to return.

He began to turn just as your smaller hand slipped into his.

You held his hand tightly like you never wanted to let go, and you didn't.

"Rin," you whispered to him, lifting your head to meet his gaze.

He looked down at you, silent as ever, like he didn't even remember you, let alone know who you were.

Your heart ached when his expression conveyed more words than his mouth ever could.

He didn't remember you.

How could he not remember you?

Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip, and your grip on his hand loosened, a look of horror spreading across your face.

'You could always back out now,' you reminded yourself, but the memories of the last time you didn't say the three words that would change everything, haunted you.

You couldn't bear the thought of losing him again.

"Rin, I—," you began, only to have him cut you off.

"You're crying," he mumbled. You hadn't even realized the salty tears staining your cheeks.

Rin brushed them away with his thumb gently, and everywhere his fingers touched felt hot.

You loved it. You didn't want it to stop.

"Rin..." you sighed, a smile appearing on your tired, red face for the first time in a very long time.

"I'm sorry," he smiled, pity radiating off him. "I don't know who you are."

You felt like crying again. You knew it was true, but you didn't want to hear it from him. You had been trying so hard to deny it, but you couldn't change the truth in the end.

"I know," you reassured him, lacing your fingers with his, holding his hand tighter. "But, Rin, I..." you trailed off.

He nodded, urging you to continue speaking. He seemed to love the sound of your voice as you loved his.

You took a deep breath, and looked into his eyes.

"I love you."