MUSIC STING

MARY: Diggs, load the water onto the boat, Walsh Scragg, forget the trench, load the food on as well.  We need to get off this cursed piece of rock as fast as we can!

DIGGS: Cap’n, what’s wrong?

 MARY:  Don’t ask questions man, move! Jenks, where’s Jenks? I need him to help me shoot you all if you don’t pick up the pace because before the sun gets any lower, you’ll wish I had! 

WALSH: Jenks and his men haven’t returned from gathering wood Cap’n.

SCRAGG: We figured he had lost his path a bit and was taking time to get back, you know how it is…What’s the problem? It’s not like this hasn’t happened before. 

MARY: (Suppressed rage) I am trying…very hard… not to blow you sky high. (Pause as she takes a breath.) Bailey! I’m promoting you to be in charge until I get back. Get everything loaded and ready to sail.  If Jenks and his men haven’t returned, we must assume the worst 

BAILEY: Cap’n, is it possible he and his men are just lost? It’s a big island, none of us know it very well.

MARY: If he is, then I may just tie him to the masthead for a few days. If he’s not… 

BAILEY:  Aye Cap’n.  Go, find Jenks, I’ll make sure we’re ready to leave in a hurry.

MARY: (under her breath) Oh I will, even if I have to tear this island apart until it’s nothing more than rubble

SFX: SOUNDS OF FIRE CRACKLING,

 MEN CHANTING IN A STRANGE LANGUAGE IN BACKGROUND

JENKS: Just keep calm men, once the Cap’n notices we’re gone, she’ll come for h’us. Remember that time in Spain? When we were about to be strung h’up and she blew open the jail doors with the ship’s canon?

PIRATE #2: (tiredly)You were.. saying that the whole time we were being dragged through the jungle…sir. And she’s still…not here.

JENKS: She’ll find h’us! You left a trail?

SMITH: Sure did, kicked up a fuss as they were dragging us to leave a nice clear trail, but it won’t do us much good if she arrives when we’re cooking in a stew pot.

PIRATE #2: Well…if we have to go down as dinner…I hope we stick in their throats. 

JENKS: That’s the spirit…

BOTH MEN CHUCKLE FEEBLY. 

CHANTING GETS LOUDER.

JENKS: They’re coming for h’us mates! Now, h’I don’t know about you, but h’I’d rather give ‘em a ‘ard time before I go. Who knows? We might be h’able to buy h’us some more time for the Cap’n to get ‘ere 

SFX: BUSHES CRASHING AS MEN MOVE THROUGH THEM.

MORRIS: Cap’n, I found Jenk’s knife next to a woodpile!

MARY: Good work Morris! All right men, spread out from this point, look for footprints, a trail, anything-

PIRATE #4: Over here! Trail as big as day! They sure didn’t think to cover it up.

MARY: That’s good! Forward men!

MORRIS: Cap’n wait-don’t you think…this is a bit too easy?

PIRATE#4: (scoffs) They’re savages that can barely rub two sticks together to make a fire. Stop worrying, lily-liver.

JONESY: Morris is right, Cap. Never saw no sign of them while we was trampling around, now we suddenly get a clear trail to their habitation? Something smells.

MARY: (with growing realization) They want us to follow the trail…Jenks and his men are just…bait. They want us all!

JONESY: What do we do Cap’n? 

PIRATE #4: Stop being such a yellow-belly. If they want us, they’ll get us. And I bet they’ve never seen cold pirate steel.

DRAWS HIS BLADE

SFX: ANSWERING BLADES ARE DRAWN AND GRASS RUSTLING

 QUIET CHANTING IN THE SAME STRANGE LANGUAGE

MORRIS: Well if they haven’t, it sure looks like they’ve seen them now.  They helped themselves to Jenks and his men’s blades.

MARY: well let’s see if they know how to use them. YeeeeeeeeeHaaaaaaa! 

SFX: MULTIPLE SWORD BLADES CLASH 

AS MEN SHOUT ANSWERING ATTACK CRIES

MUSIC STING

SFX: FIRE CRACKLING,

MEN STILL CHANTING, TALKING IN STRANGE LANGUAGE

SMITH: Well Sir, we held out as long as we could, but they’ve got us tied to a skewer now.

JENKS: My last h’act in life as a ‘andsome kabob. H’I wish me ol’ mum could see me now. She’d ‘ave a ‘issy fit, no mistake.

PIRATE #2: Sir, some more natives are showing up to watch the fun. Look Jenks, they’re toting around your blades. Is that blood?

JENKS: Probably cut themselves on accident. Ma’haybe if we’re lucky they’ll fall on them too. I can’t see ‘em. What do they look like? 

SMITH: Look a bit different from the usual crowd, sir. Wearing cloaks that cover ‘em up unlike the rest o’ these barefoot barbarians. Wearing war paint and feathers though. Look, one’s coming up to talk to us. Hey ugly! Don’t you know we’re busy being dinner? Go run your mug into a tree, it’ll improve your looks!

PIRATE#2: He’s got your knife sir! We’re done for!

MORRIS: (Whispers) You sure are if you call me mug ugly again. Keep lookin’ scared. The Cap’n has us in the camp and we move at her signal. Take the knife and start freeing yourselves wi’out catchin’ their notice. I’ll be back.

SMITH: (whispers loudly) Wait! What’s the signal? 

MORRIS: Trust me. You’ll know it when you see it.

SFX: SOUND OF GUNPOWDER BEING POURED ON THE GROUND 

MARY: (quietly) Hurry with that gunpowder, they’re lighting the fires!

JONESY: Aye, aye Captain. This is the last house. 

PIRATE#4: Morris is moving away toward the west corner of the village, Cap’n. Most of the men are in position. No one seems to notice our disguises.

MARY:  Good. Jonesy, how’s that fuse coming?

JONESY: Done Cap’n, just give the word.

PIRATE#4: They’re dragging Jenks towards the fire Cap’n!

MARY: (coldly) Light the fuses men. Let’s show these pagans some pirate steel. 

JONESY: Aye Aye Cap’n. 

SFX: SOUND OF FUSE BURNING. SLIGHT PAUSE, THEN LARGE EXPLOSSION 

PANICKED VOICES IN SAME STRANGE LANGUAGE, 

SFX: PISTOL SHOTS AND PIRATE SHOUTS.

JENKS: (chuckles) H’I’d say that was the signal.

SMITH: Watch out sir! One’s coming at you with a spear! 

WAR WHOOP BREAKS OFF WITH A GRUNT.

 JENKS: That kick to the stomach should keep ‘im down for h’a while. Gi’mmie that spear. H’I’ll ‘old them off h’until you get free. 

SFX: QUARTER STICK SOUNDS AND GRUNTS, PUNCHES AND KICKS, 

WAR WHOOP CAN BE HEARD AND JENKS GIVES A GRUNT OF PAIN 

PIRATE#2: Sir!

JENKS: Get moving! H’I’m surrounded!

MARY’S BATTLE CRY CAN BE HEARD GROWING

SFX:  BARRAGE OF KICK AND PUNCH SOUNDS MIXED IN WITH GRUNTS.

MARY: YEEEEEEEHAAAAAA!!!!! Run, you painted cowards! (panting) Here, Jenks. You left your sword in the jungle.

JENKS: Yes Cap’n, so’horry. H’it won’t ‘appen again 

MARY: I should hope not. (Tense) They’re starting to regroup for another charge, follow the others toward the beach. Now 

MUSIC STING

SFX: SOUNDS OF CRASHING THOUGH BRUSH 

 MEN BREATHING HARD AS THEY RUN. WAR WHOOPS CAN BE HEARD FARTHER AWAY

JENKS: (panting as he runs) Not that I h’ain’t h’appreciative o’ being pulled from the fire Cap’n, but did you really ‘ave to blow their ‘uts sky high?

MARY: (panting as she runs) Let me know the next time you want to be fricasseed freebooter Jenks, I won’t bother to save your salty hide. (chuckles) That’ll teach them to capture my crew.

MORRIS: They’re gaining on us Cap’n!

MARY: Keep moving! I see the ship dead ahead! Woop, watch out men! There are trip wires in the grass 

JONESY: Smith is down Cap’n!

MARY: Jenks, keep the men moving forward and tell Bailey to set sail! I’ll get Smith!

JENKS: Jonesy, keep the men mo’hoving forward, h’I’m ‘elping the Cap’n!

SFX: RUNNING SOUNDS START TO FADE,

WAR WHOOPS ARE GETTING CLOSER

MARY: Up you get, Smith, last one to the ship gets the last tankard of grog.

SMITH: No good Cap’n, I busted me knee in the fall. I can’t even stand. Just leave me, I’ll try and slow ‘em down.

MARY: Like heck I’m leaving you behind. I just saved your ungrateful arse, it’ll all be for nothing if I leave you to get stewed. Stand up man, and lean on me.

JENKS: ‘ere, let me carry ‘im Cap’n.

MARY: Hellsteeth, what in blazes are you doing here? I gave you specific orders to get my crew to the ship, Jenks! Is this mutiny 

JENKS: Wi’ all due respect Cap’n h’I thought you could use a ‘and. ‘E’s no sack of feathers 

SMITH: Cap’n, they’re getting closer!

MARY: Carry him, I’ll try to buy you some time.

JENKS: H’I ain’t leaving wi’out you Cap’n 

SMITH: Neither am I.

MARY: Fine. I’ll just slow down the front runners.

FIRES FOUR PISTOL SHOTS

MARY: Get running!

WAR WHOOPS AND CRASHING FADE AWAY, TO BE REPLACED BY