Chapter 39

Shaw

       I didn't think I'd actually get a letter about a custody hearing so quickly but I did. Kendra really was going to be fighting for full custody but I was serious when I said I wasn't going to go down without a fight. I was going to contest it.

       "Are you sure it's the right thing to do?" Holden asked as I was making a sandwich to eat. "Trust me, I'm not happy she's depriving you from seeing your kids but this whole thing is going to get out of control. Maybe you and Kendra could just talk things out."

       "Seriously?" I asked. "Kendra and I talk things out? I've been trying and she's not listening. Me drinking was only a temporary setback. I'm over that now and it's clear but she still won't let me see my kids. It's not fair. I don't even understand why she wants to go for full custody when I haven't done anything wrong."

       "Then actually talk to her," Holden said. "You two need to communicate."

       "And you need to listen," I said, patting his shoulder before taking the plate with my sandwich on it to the living room. "I tried. I told her I'm sober and she refused to let the kids come over so if she wants to play it this way, then we're playing this way."

       Holden sighed but didn't say anything else. I get where he was coming from but I tried talking to Kendra. It didn't work. She's the one who didn't want to see reason. I was trying.

       Right as I was about to bite into the sandwich, there was a soft knock on the front door. I placed the plate on the coffee table before getting up to answer the front door, feeling completely shocked as to who was standing there.

       Mercy, Lucian, and Castiel.

       And there wasn't a single adult in sight.

       "What are you three doing here?" I asked, letting my kids into the house. "And how did you get here? Did you walk through the village alone?"

        "We wanted to see you and Holden," Lucian said. "We hadn't seen you in so long and Mommy won't let us see you."

       "Yeah, and we heard her talking to that new boyfriend of hers," Mercy said. "They said she's going to go for full custidy. Does that mean we won't be able to see you at all? That's not fair. You're our dad."

       I sighed and led them over to the couch, sitting down with them. "It's very complicated what's going on," I said to them, not wanting to fully tell them what was going on.

       "Why?" Mercy asked. "Why does it have to be complicated? Why can't we go back to normal where we stay with you and Holden every other weekend and when Mom is busy?"

       I looked over at Holden and he gave me one of his 'I told you' looks. He was right. Things weren't just going to get messy for me and Kendra; it was going to get messy for the kids.

       If Kendra still wanted to fight for full custody, I was going to fight back but this time for the kids. I was going to fight for them to get what they wanted, not what Kendra and I wanted.

       "I'm going to try to make that happen," I said. "I promise. But in the meantime, I need to take you back to your mom. She's going to be worried sick when she sees you're gone."

       "We don't want to go back," Castiel said. "We want to stay here with you."

       "And believe me, I want to spend time with all of you," I said. "But not when your mom doesn't know where you are."

       It broke my heart having to send them back to Kendra's because I missed them so much but if Kendra was going to keep this custody battle up, I had to prove that I was a good father. I had to be responsible.

       We got up from the couch and I put my shoes on before walking the kids' back to Kendra's house. When Kendra opened the door, she looked both relieved and angry. "There you three are! You can't just leave the house whenever you want!'"

       "We wouldn't have to leave the house if you would let us see Dad," Lucian said.

       "Why?" Castiel said. "He's our dad and we miss him."

       "Just get inside," Kendra said. Once the kids were inside the house, she closed the door and looked at me. "You do know why I'm going for full custody, right?"

       "Actually, no, I don't," I said. "It can't be because of me drinking because I was only drunk once and I'm sober now. That was just a temporary thing and I would never drink around the kids."

       "And how do I know that?" Kendra asked. "How can I trust you that you'll never drink again?"

       "Because I have a lot going on to let it destroy my life yet again," I said. "My marriage, my kids, my job. Why would I want to destory all of that? I've never been so happy but now, it's like you don't want me to be happy."

       "That's not true," Kendra said.

       "Then why are you trying to stop me from seeing my kids?" I asked.

       "Because you're unpredictable," Kendra said. "You've been arrested twice just this year."

       "Yes, one to protect my brother-in-law, a fragile sixteen year old who would never last a day in prison," I said. "And another time for stopping Roman from harassing Holden's best friend. You know Roman, right? The man who kidnapped your daughter and is getting away with it?"

       "And what if the next time it's not because of that?" Kendra asked. "What if you lash out again?"

       "Where's all this coming from?" I asked. "You've never been worried about me lashing out before, especially because it's not going to happen."

       "I can never be so sure," Kendra said before going back into the house.

       Seriously, what had gotten into her?

____________________

oof oof much drama going on and im nowhere to be found.

jk jk i'm probably standing with calvin watching from the sidelines because drama.