For @EmoElmo124

name: Onyx

Onyx is a canon name. I'd usually let it pass, but Onyx appears multiple times, so no

Gender: Female (BTW ill make up for it)

No problem

Tribe: sandwing

I like SandWings :3

Rank: Scavenger, on the run because she stole from the treasury

I thought you meant she was a scavenger as in, a human, and I was confused for a minute

Why did her mom make her steal from the treasury?

Residence: the sky wing palace a dear friend of Queen Magma

Cool

Appearance: staying true to her name her eyes are similar to that of Blisters in all but one way instead of pure black with a small white pupil her eyes are dark purple that have a way of refection that if any light shines on them they become a beautiful light purple, her base body color is a light sandy yellow with her claws and the flaps of skin in-between the bones of her wings being a almost dirt color brown, her body type is small and brittle but that allows her to have an extreme speed advantage over other dragons, her under belly is a swirl pattern of reflective yellows and dark almost black browns

That's very descriptive! I'm surprised, it's very good. I like it. The underbelly swirls are cool, same with her purple eyes. She is the right color for a SandWing, but at the same time she is very unique. I like the detail about her body shape.

Personality: is very untrusting and worrisome where you first meet her and even when you get her to open up she still is very timid towards other dragons because of the betrayal from her mother that happened when she was very young, she loves to learn and gain knowledge (in a good way) she is very kind towards people she trusts (which are very few) she loves the thrill of a good fight but, dose not have anywhere near the guts or the heart for killing, she is very impatient and extremely sarcastic

Ha, I like this actually! It's good that her trauma has effected her, some people forget to include that in dragon's personalities.. she has flaws, but is still very trusting.. I like it.

Family:
ex-mother, as she betrayed her whilst she was a dragonet
father, unknown to her until she was older.
Mate, a dragon known as falcon a Personal Guard to the Queen
Dragonets, not interested

Interesting

Back story: she was born into a commoner family with her father gone and her only family her mother she was very dependent on her mother for raising her in-fact that her mother betrayed her as in using her as a (this isn't very PG just so u know) a street whore and commanding her to steal from the queens treasury resulting in her being on the run for 4 years before finding sanctum with the sky wing palace

Oh. That's a bit.. inappropriate? For a fanfiction based on a children's story. Oh well, I haven't seen that before, so good job on originality I guess? Again, why did her mother make her steal? What was her life like at the palace?

I'm curious.

Overall
7/10. Her name is canon, so I have to take points off for that. I have a few questions about her backstory, it is quite short.. but, she's pretty good otherwise.

(P.S I made a book called Name That Dragon which is basically a Wings of Fire version of name the apprentice... u should check it out ;))))